Getting In the Mood: Best Christmas Albums (vol. 4)

 

So, our latest edition of Getting in the mood: Best Christmas Albums we're going a different direction. This is the first on our list that isn't an album full of standards. 

JD McPherson: "SOCKS" has an oldies vibe and nods to tradition Christmas songs, but it's from 2018 and is so much more. Original, humorous, with heart and rockin'. Let's start with the opening track, "All the Gifts I Need."

I mentioned humous...When I heard the next song, "Bad Kid," I honestly laughed out loud at some of the lyrics. And it has a great groove to it.

We can't skip the title track, "Socks" a true anthem for the kids out there, unsatisfied with some of their gifts.

And who hasn't had the "Ugly Sweater Blues"

I also mentioned this album having heart. If you didn't hear any of it yet, here's some of it. "What's That Sound?"

Besides Socks, JD McPherson has released a number of Christmas singles. He also does non-Christmas music. He's doing a Christmas tour this month, if he passes by your town, check him out.

Track List:

1. All the Gifts I Need

2. Bad Kid

3. Hey Skinny Santa

4. Socks

5. Every Single Christmas

6. Ugly Sweater Blues

7. Holly, Carol, Candy & Joy

8. Santa's Got a Mean Machine

9. What's That Sound?

10. Claus Vs. Claus

Republicans, Trump and His Cult Have Ruined My Wife

 

It's a proven fact that my blogs get more views if I start off with some eye candy, and with the state of our country, I feel more people, especially the dolts need to be reading what I have to say...Not because I have a big ego, but because I'm right...So now that you've seen the wife, we're moving on...

If you've been here before, you know I'm a Democrat...I lean Left...A Liberal...I'm not offended or bothered by that term, the way people on the Right wish I was...Most of us aren't...My wife, she is the "Bleeding Heart Liberal" they are talking about when they try to use that as a slur as well...It's not...

The thing...Ok, one of the things I don't get about the Right, is how they always look down on the "Bleeding Heart Liberal"...And yes, I'm looking at you "Christian Conservatives"...The things you say you believe in are the the things the "Bleeding Heart Liberal" fights for...How they live their life...(Now I agree with my wife but this post is about her so...) 

My wife wants equal rights for all...Fucking EVERYBODY...All races, genders, religions, you name it she wants them all treated fairly and equally...She wants people to get paid a living wage so they can feed their family and have a roof over their head...She donates money to charities or "Go Fund Me's" when we have it...She wants to help people...She wants great education for everyone and she doesn't want everyone to be paying student loans for half their life...She doesn't want to see our government take kids from their families and lock them in cages...Nor does she want to see our government put immigrant women through forced hysterectomies...(That's some Nazi shit)

She believes in being kind and giving...All shit the "Christian Conservatives" should be agreeing with and fighting for, right by her side...I'm saying this based your "Good Book"...WARNING : going off on a side note....You religious right dummies...Trump this morning was tweeting that Joe Biden and the Left want to close all churches permanently...Hey stupid! Between these two guys, Joe Biden is the only one that goes to church every single week...Trumpy goes golfing and lines his pockets with tax payer dollars while he's overcharging for the rooms his staff and Secret Service have to use...

She believes women should have the right to choose what to do with their bodies, including getting an abortion, even though having an abortion would never cross her own mind...She believes that religion has no part in government, but you are ALL free to believe whatever hocus pocus you want...Just keep it in your place of worship, and in yourself...WARNING: Side note...I know all of you “pro-life” people must be upset that Trump took a drug made with Stem Cells...Oh, you don't follow Science...Regeneron, one of the "therapeutics" Trump has been getting treated with, that no other sick American could legally get, is made with fetal tissue...So that means you can't vote for him right, you hypocritical cunts?!?

My wife, for years has told me, when I was having a fit of rage about anything from politics, to an asshole picking on one of our kids, to some one fucking up my order at a restaurant, "Don't say that...Don't wish death on people"..."Don't wish bad things on people"...She'd tell me how I don't want that type of Karma on me...She'd say how that shit comes back on you...I would try, around her to ease up on it...Honestly, I always felt and I'm sure I wrote in a blog somewhere, that Karma is for weak minded people who just need an excuse to blame bad shit on, because they can't handle the reality that life is often a big kick in the dick...But over time, she got me to change a bit...But honestly, my rage still gets the better of me too often...

....

Then Trump happened...And Trump was bad enough before 2020...Then 2020 mixed with Trump...All the Trumpers, the sick fucking cult that they are...Fucking #MoscowMitch McConnell, lying, closet case, Lindsey Graham...(Yes, he pays young men for sex...There's a book coming out, unlike him!) And racists, murderous cops, be protected and defended by Republicans, Trumpers...And the White Supremacists, being openly proud, and threatening...And COVID...And the lies and misinformation spewed by the White House...And 210,000 dead Americans and counting... 

And the lies, on top of lies, on top of lies...Did I mention Trump, Kushner, Ivanka, Pence, the Idiot brothers, and Melania....

Fuck me running...

So we hit October 2020...Trump fakes getting COVID as a campaign stunt and he's playing "reality TV"...You can read my last three blogs all about that...But a switch flipped in my wife...This kind, loving, caring person, who puts everyone ahead of herself...Who tries to see the good in everyone...Who wants the best for everyone...She has had enough with Trump, his enablers and his cult...

No one would be surprised if I told you I smiled and said "I hope the lying cunt dies" when Kayleigh McEnany tested positive...No one was surprised when I wished death on Trump and his "Whore wife" in my blog, on Twitter and Facebook...But if you know my wife, you may be surprised that she has applauded and been happy as a pig in shit when all these Republican, science denying, 'COVID is like the Flu' assholes started coming down with it...

You mother fuckers are so fucking corrupt and evil...You lying mother fuckers, got one of the sweetest people in the world, hoping you all die...Maybe that's karma...They're all so fucking awful, they even have good people hoping they die and rot in the Hell they believe in...

Thanks, Trump, Trumpers, Right-wing assholes, morally bankrupt "Christian Conservatives" and the majority of the Republican party...If it wasn't bad enough my kids had a father constantly losing his shit about you assholes, now their mother is too...My wife is the greatest person in the world and you fucktards have driven her to the edge...

Actually, her rage, not aimed at me, is kinda sexy!

Question: Sleep Number Beds

 For some time we have been hearing about "Sleep Number Beds"...They seem to have become popular...you know the commercials where him and her share what their " Sleep Number" is...I've also talked to friends who have them and they love it...

 The basic idea is you and your partner can set your individual sides of the bed to your specific settings for optimum sleep comfort.... But there is a question that no has come out and answered about these beds....

 What about sex?

 I know, I'm a pig...But I like to be comfortable when it's time to get some stank on the hang-low...I'm sure most of us prefer to be comfortable when it's time to bump uglies...So how are you suppose to set your "Sleep Comfort Bed?"

 Does it depend on who's on top, or bottom? Or is there specific settings for each position?

 I'm sure this seems trivial, but these beds are a big investment and I'm sharing this bed...I want us to be comfortable not just when we're sleeping, but when I'm laying the wood too...

The salespeople don't answer this question...The website doesn't...We all aren't lazy, just using this thing to sleep...I plan on driving this bitch to Pound-Town! So help me out...

 What's your sex number?

Breaking News: Browns Rebuilding....

....AGAIN!

Yes, in a not shocking at all development, last night Browns owner Jimmy Haslam fired idiot GM, Ray Farmer and in over his head, Head Coach Mike Pettine...

In more shocking news from Cleveland...The Browns organization also isn't happy with QB Johnny Manziel who didn't show up for his mandatory concussion protocol stuff Sunday, after it was widely reported that he was seen (shockingly) partying in Vegas....

Will this criminal fuck Haslam cut ties with this ass-clown Manziel finally?  Who knows...Who cares...They're both fucking retarded!

I will tell you all what I have for the past five years...Walk away from the Browns...The do nothing but take up your time and money....You would keep going back to a restaurant that kept serving you awful, rotten, spoiled, food, with grossly inflated prices...So why the fuck do you keep going back to the Browns!?!

Oh...Wait there is one more piece of breaking Browns news...You see those two ladies at the top correct...Shockingly, Steelers fans manage to be sexier then Browns fans...

Saturday Breakfast in Bed

So so being the swell dad that I am, right after school Friday I took my oldest back to Ohio to see the last home game of the season for our Brooklyn Hurricanes...She wanted see her friends, and see the fantastic band one more time...she even had hope that the 1-7 'Canes would pull out a win...

But with a minute left, they blew it, and lost 24-21...

She had fun and was happy to see her friends...Then we went to the old house and grabbed some odds and ends that were "non-essentials"  in the move...got gas, and a coffee and headed home...

I unloaded a few things and said screw it...It was midnight and I had been up since 6:45 AM....Then the damn dog starts bugging me for a walk, because he didn't get our standard late evening stroll...After that I caught some scores and passed out on the couch...woke up at 3:00AM and dragged myself off to bed...

For today, I have to take the kids to get pumpkins, and hit the grocery store so I can make some grub for friends that are coming over...

Yeah, I could use some breakfast in bed!

Who the hell said three's a crowd!?!

Enough with the PC Bullshit!

I in no way approve of hitting women, and would never do such a thing, but I thought the picture was funny, based on the topics this post is going to hit...Political Correctness, Humor, Caitlyn/Bruce Jenner...And how this PC shit is running wild and needs to stop...

First to Jenner...I have seen it on TV, heard it on the Radio and Podcasts, in day to day interactions...If someone happens to refer to Jenner as Bruce, (his given name) or says he instead of she, there is someone else right there to chime in and tell you how you have misspoke...That you are possibly intolerant, and offensive...Listen dipshit, Jenner has been known as Bruce, a dude, for what, 65 years...Fuck off, and give people a chance to get use to calling him Caitlyn and she, and her...Yeah, I said him...You know why?  Because the Cunt still has a cock! Until he lops that dick off, grows a puss and fucks himself with said dick, I don't care if people call him he, or him, or dude, or whatever the fuck!

Now we move into the humor area...Spike (the guys network) cut Clint Eastwood doing a joke about Jenner at some bullshit awards show, because suddenly they have a "No Trans Joke policy"...What the fuck ever...But they aren't alone...The Late night comedy shows have been sidestepping cracking jokes about Jenner...Seth Meyers said he wouldn't do any...So now I give you a long video, but worth the time...It's Opie and Jim Norton, along with comedian Sherrod Small talking about all this and then watching a clip of Jerry Seinfeld on Meyers' show talking about how people are getting carried away with the PC shit...Seinfeld, who has always been a clean comic...They stop the clip a couple times for Norton to go off on his own rant, and praise Seinfeld...The video is 15 minutes long, but worth it...They get into the Seinfeld clip around 2:50...As they get back into the clip around 8:00 some guy from the New Yorker chimes in, and Seinfeld eventually grills him about the PC shit, before calling out Meyers about not doing Jenner Jokes...





America, do you understand how far we have taken this bullshit...Jerry fucking Seinfeld, has had enough...If Jerry Seinfeld, a clean, safe, TV friendly comedian is telling us we have taken the PC shit too far, then I think we better listen...

In closing, Fuck off!

Bill Burr on Sports ( Volume: I lost track!)

This time around we listen to Bill celebrate the Red Sox World Series victory, Boston Sports, trash Yankees fans, talk 'roids, Hockey, and more...






The Beeze

Some More Wisdom from Bill Burr

This video is from a few months back, but in under 5 minutes, Bill Burr sums up the change in Boston sports and sports fans...The bullshit Politicians spew...And Lars was right...





The Beeze

Monday Moaning (A Day Late and a Dollar Short)

Yes, I took a personal day...Needed a Monday Moaning breather...But here I am, back for more...Back with more to say...And since I took that breather, let me give you all just a little extra of the good stuff...

Now that I've taken care of the sexy, I am happy to say that Notre Dame will be playing in the BCS Championship game against Alabama...I think I made my thoughts clear HERE...There isn't a doubt in my mind that ND can beat Alabama...I'm not calling a blowout...But they can win...It should be a close game...

The Bowl game that most people seem excited about is the Fiesta Bowl...Kansas State vs. Oregon...A Championship game many wanted to see, before both teams lost...It should be a fun one...

But the Bowl causing all the controversy is the Orange Bowl, which has Northern Illinois taking on Florida State...The 12-1 Huskies did everything required of them to earn an at large bid for a BCS bowl...All the other conferences knew about this rule...ESPN knew about it...It was many of their talking heads that kept raising a stink about the likes of past Boise State, TCU, Utah, and Nevada teams not getting a fair shot at BCS bowls...

So now, a MAC school does it, and everyone is pissed...They keep screaming Oklahoma should be there...WHY?  Because they're a big name...So what...They lost to Notre Dame, and Kansas State...They win both those games, they're playing for it all...They win one of those games, and maybe they win their conference and get the automatic bid...College Football has always been clear...You have to win...Win...There's no playoff (yet) so you have to be perfect, or nearly perfect to go anywhere...Otherwise, go fuck yourself...So stop with this Oklahoma, Georgia, LSU, should be there instead of NIU...

NIU is 12-1...You're not...NIU won their conference...You didn't...NIU finished in the top 15...They hit the requirements...NIU's QB is better then yours...NIU is giving their students 1 free ticket each to the Orange Bowl...Your school isn't/wouldn't....I'll take the Huskies over you crying cunts!

-Sunday, my NFL viewing options were the Lions and Colts and Packers vs the Vikings...I could care less about these teams...The Lions have been a bust...The Colts are rebuilding...I don't care about Andrew Luck and his come backs...The Packers have been overrated, or underachieving, or both...And the Vikings are trying to get their shit together...I just don't care...The NFL just really bores me...So the kids and I went ice skating...We've been going twice a week for a few weeks now...Maybe I'll start getting my ass back in shape...

When we got home, the Browns game versus the Raiders was on...Guess what?  I didn't fucking watch it...Two of the worst teams in the NFL going head to head in the battle of who could care less...No thanks...I made meatloaf, mash potatoes and corn instead... (the Browns won)

-The big story this week in the NFL was Chiefs LB Javon Belcher shooting and killing his girlfriend and mother of their 3 month old daughter...Then he went to the Chiefs facilities, and killed himself in front of his coach and GM...It's an awful story, and while many have touched on it, no one has said something that needs to be said...I don't care if you were his friend of a family member of his, and you're reading this...FUCK JAVON BELCHER!  Anything good he ever did in his life was voided Saturday...He got off easy taking his chicken shit way out...Fuck this fucking fuck...His daughter has no parents...And one day she'll learn about what happened, and what will that do for her?  Break her heart...Fill her with anger...God knows what else...Javon Belcher is/was a piece of shit....That's all his head stone should say...

- And since I'm already angry...I'm sure everyone has heard about the homeless guy who had no shoes...So a NYC cop bought him a pair of water resistant boots and some socks...The picture of it all has become huge...

Well once again, this guy has no shoes...When he was seen without the boots, barefoot again, he was asked about it...His story..."They're hiding." He feels that they are expensive, and could get stolen...

Well kids, I'm calling bullshit!  You're fucking homeless...Where the fuck are they hiding?  I hate to be cynical, but am...I don't believe this shit one bit...This fucker sold those boots for some drugs or booze...This cop did a great thing...I have to wonder how he feels about this...Probably gonna think twice before he thinks about reaching into his pocket for some one again...

-A year ago this past weekend, the comedy world lost a great...If you have a hour to kill, come back and click on this video, and listen to great interview with Patrice O'Neal...It's not just about comedy, it's a real, honest, and funny conversation that gave great insight into a hell of a comic...




That's it for now...Have a week...

The Beeze.

Who Knew "Peanuts" Was So Offensive?

It's Halloween, and even though Trick or Treat has been pushed back to the weekend because of the storms here, there's no reason not to celebrate the day a bit...

 What I'm about to post, many will find very offensive...With out a doubt, it is full of racist stereotypes, and fucked up sexual comments...Seriously, if you don't like "Blacksploitation" you shouldn't watch...If you are easily offended, you shouldn't watch...Seriously, it's fucked up...

Me, I can get past that shit...Yeah, racist humor can be offensive...Sure feeling can be hurt...Maybe it's not nice...But I disagree with the douchebag at my work who nearly cried as he said, "Not everything is a joke!"  I replied, "Yes it is...If you can't come here and have fun, bust balls, and laugh, go home and eat a gun."  I really try not to take everything so damn seriously...I can see past the shit in this video that will offend many, solely because it is hilarious to hear this shit coming out of Charlie Brown and his Peanuts pals mouths...

 Thanks to my pal Lew who sent this to me last Halloween...






Happy Halloween!

The Beeze.

Change We Can Believe In

In the past I have talked about running for President...It's all been written with humor, and a touch of seriousness...The things I have said I would push to do, are actually things I would love to do...Things like legalizing pot, and taxing it like we do with cigarettes and alcohol, and legalizing prostitution, and taxes those chicks and regulating that shit...Yep, I'd really do that shit...

Well, I have something else on that to-do list...Get rid of pennies...They taught us all about rounding our numbers in school when we were tiny tots...Shit my kids have learned that shit too...Well lets put it to use...Fuck pennies...FACT: It costs 3 cents to make each of those stupid ass 1 cent pennies...Right off the rip, we're pissing money away...Get rid of stupid pennies...Round prices up or down...Enough of this X number of dollars and 99 cents shit...Round it up to the next dollar...

Loose change is just an annoyance...I'd be all for getting rid of nickles too...Shit, the hell with dimes...Quarters may have to stick around a little longer, but I'm all for getting rid of all coins...The majority of us, when not using cash, are swiping our cards...ATM cards, and credit cards...We've all seen the guy buying $6.84 of shit at a corner store or coffee shop, or gas station...And what does he use...A card...So fuck the coins...Round the prices, and stop losing money making stupid fucking pennies!

I approve this message!

The Beeze.

Mike Polk Jr. Killing the Browns Again!

Yep, Cleveland's favorite funny-man/angry Browns fan, has made another excellent video...Mike has pulled out his big, funny, sick of this bullshit, hard cock, and slammed it right up in the Browns' stupid ass...




Great job!

Mike Polk Jr. once again, saying what needs to be said!


Later, The Beeze.

Hey Cleveland, What About The Beezewax?

So apparently Cleveland Magazine is having some kind of "March Madness" Bracket for the best Cleveland Blogger...And these assholes didn't include me...HERE'S a look at their bracket...Clearly these snooty East Side pricks aren't reading the right shit!

The Beezewax has always given an honest view of Cleveland, from some one who has lived here his entire life...ME! No pretty skyline picture up top there...A quality shot of the good ole days, when the river banks were on fire from the insane amount of oil and pollution in the water...

No pandering to the sports teams in hopes of getting an interview...I don't need to interview Mike Holmgren to know he prefers to be in Seattle...I don't need to interview anyone from the Indians...I have 162 games to watch and see how poorly they spend the little money that they do spend...(Great deal they gave Hafner...Hack is a part-time DH who hasn't hit shit since MLB cracked down on 'roids, and he's making more money then Jesus!)

And let's not forget that I nailed the Heisman winner back in JULY!

No fluffy restaurant reviews...Fuck Matt Fish and Melt! Honest reviews from a guy who has been in the business since he was 13...By the way, South Side has a good one coming their way...Long wait...Hate when places that don't take reservations...Decent service...Good food...Good drinks...And the wife blew me on the way home, so mostly positive!

Open and and honest talk about politics and and current events...Like THIS and THIS and THIS and THIS...

And let's not forget about my feelings on CHINA...

Yet, I still find a way to mix in some light-hearted stuff as well, like THIS and THIS...

But I expect nothing less from those hacks at Cleveland Magazine...That rag is one of those pieces of shit, that if you buy advertising, they'll suck your ass...It lacks integrity, and kisses the asses of the well-off Clevelanders, and could give a shit about the hard working, grinders that really make up this Godforsaken place...

They can all Suckle me...This is the best blog in town you dolts!

Later, The Beeze.

Bill Burr on Sports (volume: Fuck, I Forget where we're at)

Fucking Tim Tebow...He's got everyone going...Including Bill Burr...Take it away Bill...





Later, The Beeze.

SHOCKING NEWS: Marines Piss on People!

First, let me start by saying this...The blurred boxes over these guys cocks, is being very generous...

Second, am I the only person not shocked by this? News broke Wednesday that there was pictures and video of U.S. Marines pissing on some insurgents they took out...Seriously, I just assumed that on occasion, military personnel, who have seen some serious combat may have to let off some steam...And possibly some piss on the bastards they've been battling...And I doubt that U.S. troops are the first and only to do this...I'm not saying all have done it, I'm just saying some probably have...

I've never served in the military...I've never been in combat, and had mother fuckers shooting at me...The most intense battle I ever had was chaperoning Little Beeze's kindergarten class to the Zoo...Now I didn't piss on anyone, but I was frazzled...So I would guess that if I made through a fire-fight in Afghanistan, I might piss on some one...Shit, I've farted in people's faces just for shits and giggles! (Little Beeze included)

Here's the video...It's been removed from YouTube a few times already, so expect it to get bounced again...




Yeah, maybe it was wrong, but what might be the bigger problem, is the fact that these Marines were willing to pull out those tiny dicks in front of a camera!

Later, The Beeze.

Rest In Peace Patrice O'Neal

Word broke today that comedian Patrice O'Neal (41) had died...He had suffered a stroke back on October 19th...Since then there had no talk of his recovery as his family has kept things quiet...All of us who are fans of his comedy were hoping for good news soon, but sadly things didn't turn out that way...

I first learned of Patrice O'Neal from the Opie and Anthony Show...His open and honest takes on women, relationships, race, and everything else were not only funny, but brilliant...It's not just a sad day for the comedy world, it's a sad day for the world.

Here are a few examples of Patrice bringing us laughs and thoughts...




From his last stand up special, Elephant in the Room"










Here Patrice breaks down the song "Creep"...It's hilarious, because it's true!




Here's Patrice standing up to dolts about what funny is...




Listen up ladies...




Here's the Classic, "Side Pussy"





Rest In Peace Patrice O'Neal.

"Factory of Sadness" Going Viral

The last couple weeks I've been going off on how awful the Cleveland Browns have been...Including calling for fans to stop wasting their money on such a horrible product...Well after Sunday's embarrassing performance against the Texans, Cleveland comic, Mike Polk took to the streets and expressed his thoughts, and the thoughts of so many of us on the Browns...




It's funny because it's true...Adding to the humor, Polk is out there rocking the jersey of Butch Davis' best draft pick ever...Long Snapper, Ryan Pontbriand!

Polk's "Factory of Sadness" hit a home run, and just hours later, the image at the top, Cleveland Browns Stadium turned "Factory of Sadness" was born...The video has hit news shows, and is all over Facebook and Twitter...Mike Polk finally getting some love...Too bad the Browns have to suck so bad for Polk to get some attention.

Later, The Beeze.

Bill Burr on Sports (Vol. 7)

It's been awhile since we leaned on Bill Burr for some sports coverage, but lets be honest...The usual talking heads on ESPN and on Sports Talk Radio can get really tired...Sometimes it's better to get the view of an everyday, ordinary, regular guy...Who just happens to be a comic, and does a podcast every Monday...

And this week, Bill Burr talked a little Football! Let's start with his take on Raiders fans...




Next, Bill took on the topic of Mark Sanchez...




He really has a quality view on shit...Let's close with Bill showing his slightly crazy side...A side I fully understand...




Later, the Beeze.

Honey Badger is a Bad-Ass!

What, you don't know about the Honey Badger!?! "Honey Badger don't give a shit!" Just ask Randall...




Like I said, he's a Bad-Ass!

Later, the Beeze.

Tebow Has Been Replaced

That's right Tebow...ESPN has a new golden boy, and his name is Tony Romo...After Monday night's game, suddenly Tony Romo can do no wrong...Every Mike, Mike, Scott, Chris, Linda, and everyone else at ESPN is swinging on Romo's nuts...

Yes, Romo played with his cracked-up ribs, and banged up lung...He we all up in everyones' shit on the sidelines, looking like Johnny Leader...Dez Bryant even said he only played because Romo was going out there banged up...Suddenly Romo is the ultimate man!

Really, last I checked he still had his pinkie, and Ronnie Lott has his lopped off and went back in the game! Okay, I'm not trying to shit on Romo...Guy played well, while in plenty of pain...Yeah, it's nice to see a quarterback act like the rest of the guys in the league...But it is the amount of ball licking done by ESPN and other talking heads that makes me sick...

But enough about me...How the hell do you think Tim Tebow feels...Not only is he not a starting quarterback, but now this week no one is talking about him not being a starting quarterback...Tim you better get hurt at practice and then show up Sunday ready to hold that clip board all day...Shit, this is Tebow we're talking about...He better die, and rise from the dead...Then maybe ESPN will be back on his ball-bag and forget about Romo.

Later, The Beeze.