Boston Be Better...I'm Not Talking to the Team

 

Since August 15th numerous members of the Boston sports media have been shitting on Bruins goalie, Tuukka Rask...Also that gas-bag, jackass Milbury...Rask decided to leave the NHL playoff Bubble and go home to be with his family...Rask has three young daughters...It was kept very vague why Rask left, other then to be with his family...

This vagueness lead to many fans and media to attack Rask for being soft and mentally week, that he couldn't handle the situation...That he chokes...Feel free to look at his STATS ...Most teams would be fine to have him as their goalie...But let's be honest, this is Boston we are talking about...The city is right behind Philly and New York for having a fanbase largely compiled of assholes!

Eventually, it came out that one of Rask's daughters had a medical emergency...Many backed off...Some even apologized...But there were still assholes calling him a quitter....FUCK ALL OF YOU PEOPLE! And yes some of the comments were still coming out that he chokes and he's not that good...

Yeah, well he sure as fuck was better than that hack, Halak! How'd that go for ya?

Oh yeah, the Bruins lost 4 games to 1 against Tampa Bay last night...And the anti-Rask talk came out again...Lead by this asshole....

Marc James and other like him...and there are others like him, want hockey players to care more about playing hockey then they do about their families...Their kids...Marc James if you don't know, is best known for sexually harassing women...And now he is best known for being an asshole to a hockey player who decided to be a father first and a hockey player second...

I love the city of Boston, but dipshits like this makes the whole place look like shit! You should be embarrassed...I hope none of you ever have to deal with a child having a health issue and have to make the decision to be with your family, knowing that a whole fucking city is going to shit on you for being a good parent.

Change the name to all your sports teams to the Boston Cunts! 

Boston College...A Joke in Their Own City

Yes, that is a football field in historic Fenway Park...And it sure looks like a home field for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish...

The Irish will be playing long time rival, Boston College at Fenway Park...This year the game was thrown under the "Shamrock Series" label, which is something the Irish have done for the last five years...It's supposedly a big thing for alumni around the country, but I think it has more to do with recruiting....They play at a neutral site, and wear a completely different uniform from the traditional ND style...

This year, it isn't a neutral site...It's in Boston...But for some reason, the field sure looks like a ND home field...And the Irish special uniforms...They have been dubbed "the Green Monster uniforms"....

"Green Monster" uniforms...The Notre Dame Fighting Irish written in the end-zones...Hey Boston College, did you also say, 'Hey Notre Dame, could you please fuck all of our girlfriends and sisters while you're making yourself at home!?!'

I get it...It's good for fans...It's good for Alumni...It's good for recruiting...It's good for the city of Boston, especially hotels and bars...People will actually pay attention to Boston College football for a few minutes...It's great...But it sure makes BC look like bitches!

Bill Burr on Sports ( Volume: I lost track!)

This time around we listen to Bill celebrate the Red Sox World Series victory, Boston Sports, trash Yankees fans, talk 'roids, Hockey, and more...






The Beeze

Monday Moaning

 

It is the Monday after the NFL Draft, and I don't know about you, but I need a bath...Why you ask? Well, I live in Cleveland...And after this draft, it really fucking stinks in here! 

There is this thing in Cleveland when everyone gets their hopes up when the Draft rolls around...Sadly, since 1999 the Browns have had a lot more misses then hits...In April Browns fans are blindly optimistic, lead by the Cleveland media that is more often than not blindly swinging on the nuts of the team, and believing everything they say to be gospel...There are very few who are willing to criticize the team on draft weekend, and those who do, like me, get shouted down....

Example: When the Browns took Notre Dame Safety Jamoris Slaughter in the 6th round, I voiced my displeasure with this move...You know I love ND, and I like Slaughter, but kid played 3 games, and tore his Achilles last year....The year before he missed most the season after a shoulder injury...He was only in the draft because the NCAA disallowed a second medical redshirt...Yes, he's a big hitter...But he's a small guy, just under 6 ft. and 195 pounds...So of course it was tweeted at me that in 39 games he made 98 tackles...Big fucking deal...Former ND safety, now Vikings safety made 93 tackles in one season...Another ND Safety, Zeke Motta, taken in the 7th round by the Falcons made 77 tackles this year...Why the fuck wouldn't you take the heavy hitter that he is, instead of the guy who has been hurt the last two seasons?

Another asshole tweeted at me, "You know it's the 6th round?" Yeah dick face...I also know there are better players and players who aren't hurt out there!  Everyone at 92.3 the Fan are fucking idiots, who just got the rights top air the Browns games this season, so they're all afraid to be fucking honest...

Then they start tweeting that Mike Mayock was raving about the Browns getting Slaughter...Well no shit...He gets one of his paychecks doing color for Notre Dame games...He's not gonna blast a ND guy...Fucking tools!

The Browns first round pick, Barkevious Mingo, DE from LSU...Fine pick there...They had no 2nd round pick...They gave that up when they took Josh Gordon in the supplemental draft last year...Fine...Kid has skills...3rd round they took CB, Leon McFadden from San Diego St....WTF!  Kid is 5-9...I like my corners a little taller...Kid ran a 4.5 40...I like my corners faster, especially if they are short...Kid was projected as a 6th rounder....Of fucking course he was!  Then they show a quick video of him...The clip showed him getting beat by a WR 4-5 inches taller and if the QB could hadn't overthrown it, it's a TD...

No worries, the Browns have more picks...Wait, they traded a 4th and 5th to the Dolphins for Devone Bess...Okay, so adding him, plus the recent acquisition of David Nelson, the Browns are okay at WR...Then they traded another 4th round pick to Pittsburgh for their 4th round pick next year...Then they traded another 5th round pick to the Colts for their 5th round pick next year...Okay, so they are already throwing in the towel on this year's draft...Got it...

In the 7th round they drafted two guys, one DE and one OL, both from division 2 schools...Listen, no offense to D-2 guys, but if you wanted them, you probably could have signed them as rookie free agents...The DE has a great history of getting busted for selling dope to undercover police...TWICE!  Great pick...Then the Browns went and signed Notre Dame C/G Braxston Cave...(Finally a smart move)...They also locked up Bess for 3 years...

The media kept saying this draft was weak...Light in star players...So maybe be smart and load up on depth...Like the Patriots who traded out of the 1st round (29 overall) for a 2,3,4,and 7th round picks...Oh, and they made a trade Jeff Demps and a 7 for LaGarrette Blount...The depth they added...2 WR, OLB, ILB, CB, S, and DE...3 players, all on Defense from Rutgers...I guess Bill liked something he saw from the Scarlet Knights D...

All I know for sure, is a couple months back I talked about me and my sports fandom being free agents when it comes to the NFL and MLB, because the Browns and Indians make me sick...I gave my baseball fandom to The Nationals with an eye on the Orioles and Pirates...In the NFL I talked about the Seahawks and Patriots...Yeah, sticking with that...The Browns proved me right this weekend...All I had to see was what the Bengals and Steelers, and Ravens were doing in the draft...Ravens looking to fill holes and maintain...Steelers and Bengals looking to get better...And they both did...The Browns look like they are maintaining...Only problem is, no one should want to maintain when you are a perennial loser!

-Other Draft news...Matt Barkley proved something I've known for awhile...USC QB's are overrated...4th round to Philly...Ouch...Which of their 4 QB's will stay and which will go?

Geno Smith doesn't go in the 1st round, which is hilarious since both ESPN and NFL network filled their promo shit with him...Lucky guy then goes to the Jets...Clearly the Jets wanted to lead the league in drama again...6 QB's now...Including the hack, Mark Sanchez, and the media darling Tim Tebow, now adding Smith who has already shown what a twat he is by tweeting his smarmy feelings to scouts and draft "experts"...Kid is going to flop...Especially going to that environment...

What I watched of the draft I watched on the NFL Network...ESPN is awful...I can't stand Berman, Gruden, and Kiper...How is it old Mel keeps his job...All this guy does is analyze players for the draft, and he is religiously wrong...Mayock is a douche, but he's right a lot more than the dopes on ESPN....

But then the NFL Network guys got on my nerves when they wouldn't shut up about Manti Te'o...People, you want to know why he slipped?  Watch the National Championship game again...Missed tackle after missed tackle...Found himself out of position to make plays for the first time all year...On the biggest stage...With a cloud of lies hanging over his head about a fake, dead girlfriend...It's not the girlfriend shit...It's not even the slow 40 time...It's that game, and how he got owned...I knew he'd get drafted...There is too much potential there not too...But 1st round...No way...hey, lucky for him, he's going to San Diego...Wasn't his girl in the Hospital there!?!

-The NHL playoffs will get started this week...My NY Rangers are playing well and seem to have it all together at the right time...They'll start off with The Washington Capitals...Hopefully they roll right through them...Rick Nash finally gets to take his game to the Playoffs...Looking to see him shine...

Chicago is the favorite out West, but they open up with the Minnesota Wild who have been a pain in their ass this year...The Wild have invested a lot this year...They want to win now...Should be an interesting goaltending battle between The Wild's Backstrom and The Blackhawks' Crawford...Both teams have firepower, so it will come down to which goalie can steal a game or two.

-This coming Saturday we have the Kentucky Derby...I love Derby day...We get the kids together and all pick horses...The kids have done well the last few years...Always a good time...Maybe I'll give them a couple Mint Juleps...Make it easier to take their money!

-One last thing...Last week I wrote about my love of Boston, and about how awesome that city was in the face of tragedy...I meant every word of it...But I have to say, I'm kind of getting sick of the media and Boston itself patting themselves on the back for singing the National Anthem at sporting events...No offense Beantown, but where I grew up, that's what you're suppose to do...Be proud, but no need for a curtain call for doing what you're suppose to.

Have a week...

The Beeze

Monday Moaning

Here at You Gab Sports we have guys from all over the country talking about sports and sometimes other stuff too...But to be honest, we are a Boston heavy crew...I know there are people already sick of all the Boston coverage, but shit impacts people differently...So I suspect you'll see a bit more Boston talk here...Sully while trapped in Georgia, is from Boston...Mo, Harry, Lanz, are from Boston...Radatz, and Hal too...Frag is in Vermont, he's a New Englander, so he's close to Boston...And while I'm from Cleveland, my favorite city to go to is Boston, thanks to my wife, who is originally from Beantown...Her sisters and their families are there, so when the events on Monday at the Marathon happened, the first thing I did was call her...Then we reached out to her family there to make sure they were all okay...They are thankfully...

Then came everyone's heightened awareness/fear...Check you local Metro sections from last week...Tuesday was full of bomb scares throughout the country...There were couple scares/evacuations in Cleveland...There were all over...Which proved to us all, that what happened in Boston can happen anywhere...In other parts of the world it happens all the time...Here we don't think about it much...While that may make us look or feel naive, it should also make us feel lucky, that we live somewhere that doesn't have bombs going off every week...Or day...

Then, as I was about to dig into this story about the new Browns owner, Jimmy Haslam's company Pilot Flying J being locked down with warrants from the FBI and IRS, a fertilizer plant in west, Texas exploded....The first video of the explosion was horrifying...The amount of damage was frightening...Multiple blocks just leveled...So far, 15 dead...Still many missing...While this didn't seem to be an attack, it was still a horrible loss of life and shattered families that left me wondering what is going on here?

Then came Thursday...The FBI released pictures of the suspects in the Boston bombings...5 hours later, between 10:00 and 10:30 PM, news broke that a MIT police officer was shot and killed...Then a carjacking...For some reason the news networks chalked it up as a coincidence and didn't think it was linked, and moved on...I thought it was linked, and so did many others on twitter...Links were posted for Boston police scanners...I along with many other were all in...listening to the scanner and tweeting about what we were hearing...There became no doubt in our minds that these were the guys when over the scanners, Watertown police started calling out "Shots fired!"  followed by "They're throwing grenades!"..."Loud explosions!"..."Shots fired!"...Then the worst call of an "Officer down."
...And then there was the call that the had one of the suspects was down...Shortly after that the scanners confirmed it was the bombers when the call went out that the suspect still loose was "The suspect with the white hat, from the pictures."

All the news was breaking on twitter...CNN didn't bother to cover things until well after 1:00 AM...The other networks didn't bother to jump in until almost 3:00 AM...Me, I was listening to the scanner and watching twitter until 4:00AM...Then I got myself a quick 3 hours of sleep before getting the kids to school and myself to work...All day, checking twitter for updates...Boston was locked down looking for this scumbag...

Friday evening came...He was still loose...The lock down was lifted...And thank God...Because a Watertown resident went outside, saw something odd with  his boat...Saw blood...saw a body...And let police know...Police swarmed the yard...More shots were fired...Police and FBI took their time...They were careful, in case this asshole had more explosives...They took him alive...And the news that he was in custody, again came first from twitter...All the TV news guys got off their smart phone, or from their ear piece, being told via twitter, asshole was captured...I had just taken my kids skating...I kept checking my phone...When I saw the BPD tweet, I texted my wife at home, letting her know...She asked how did I know, since she was watching on TV..."Just got the tweet"...A minute or two later she texted back that the TV just announced it...CNN starting to look more and more irrelevant!

While I know people want revenge and would like to see this asshole dead like his brother, I'm glad they took him alive, in the hopes that they git information out of him...The suspects may be caught/dead, but there are still questions...As for myself, the restraint shown by the police is something I wouldn't have had...I would have shot the hell out of his legs, so he could feel just like those he attacked...

And while these stories were unfolding, that little prick in North Korea must be pissed because know one is talking about him anymore...And our politicians voted down a a bill that at least 75-80% of citizens supported...Getting 80% of Americans to agree on anything is bitch, yet the DC douchebags managed to screw that up to...And yes, the conspiracy theorist are out there in full force...Yes, they are back, saying the government is behind the Boston bombings...These people need to calm down...I don't like the government either, but I just can't buy into that stuff...Yeah, they politicize the hell out of horrible stuff, but I can't buy them blowing up innocent kids....So Alex Jones and Glen Beck, shut the fuck up.

As for sports...I don't have much there this week...I watched The New York Rangers knock the New Jersey Devils out of the playoff hunt Sunday...The Rangers seem to be clicking on all cylinders...Good timing...Hopefully they'll ride it through the playoffs...

But the sports highlight came when I was taking a break from the news...Little Ms. Molls working on her baseball swing already!

That can always take your mind off the bad shit...

Saturday Boston celebrated their first responders, their wounded, their dead, their unity as a city and as Americans...And much of the country celebrated with them...The best way to celebrate, is keep on going...And I gotta get going...I'm a single dad for the first half of the week, as Mrs. Beeze is in Pittsburgh for some training for her new job...

It would be easy to play a standard "Boston" song here...But I'll give some of the young rockers coming out of Beantown...Mean Creek, with two members who grew up in Watertown...

Have a week...I'll try to find you "Left of the Dial."

Some More Wisdom from Bill Burr

This video is from a few months back, but in under 5 minutes, Bill Burr sums up the change in Boston sports and sports fans...The bullshit Politicians spew...And Lars was right...





The Beeze

Monday Moaning

 

There's been a lot of talk and little debate about control, and the second amendment...Too many shootings, and I'm not just talking about the mass shootings that get all the media coverage...I think we really need to have some honest talk about guns...But not in this post...I'm just pimping one hell   of a calendar...The Hot Shots 2013 calendar...

I'm not a gun nut...But I don't mind these gals making these weapons look a little sexier...

Now, lets get into sports...As I had predicted in our pal IHM's NFL pre-season post, the "Super Bowl" will be the 49ers vs. the Ravens...Yes, I love to pat myself on the back when I'm right...Although, I didn't actually enjoy seeing the Patriots get worked by the Ravens...But I'll be okay...

That said, I'm not looking forward to the non-stop Harbaugh coverage we're going to get...And even worse will be the Ray Lewis nut-swinging...And could some one in the mainstream-media please call out Ray when he's preaching about God's Will...Was it also God's Will for Ray to father 6 children with 4 different women...I guess the rest of us have been going to the wrong church...Ray must go to the Church of the Holy Hood-Rats!

As for the folks in Boston, I'm not sure if they'll be okay...I was texting with my brother-in-law during the game...He was getting pretty pissed...I love those moments when people in Boston say "Brady sucks!"  The guy is one of the best, all-time...He's not the only Bostonian to lose it like this...I've known of other Boston fans like that...I was talking to Sully, a Boston native, and he's noticed this too....

The problem is, after so many years of sucking...Boston has gotten spoiled...The Patriots have been to five "Super Bowls" in the last 12 years...They won 3...My wife, a Boston native, and I have been married for 12 years...So I have become more in tune to Boston sports...In that 12 years, the Patriots have won 3 titles...The Red Sox 2...The Celtics and Bruins each 1...7 pro sports championships in 12 years...5 trips to the "Super Bowl"....You people in New England need to fucking relax...

The last time the Browns won a Championship was before there was a "Super Bowl"...The Indians haven't won a title since 1948...The Cavs haven't won shit, ever!  And we lost multiple pro hockey teams...Do you know how many idiotic people in Cleveland would give their first born for a Browns "Super Bowl" win...Shit...Some would give a nut just to make the playoffs...

Alright Bostonians...Take a breath...Relax...Have a Sam Adams...Checkout the latest Smokeshow on Barstool...It will be okay...We'll all be watching the Patriots in the playoffs again next year...

-Now last week I gave lance Armstrong the beating I felt he deserved...And that was before I saw some of his bullshit with Oprah...Believe me, he didn't win anyone over with that...He actually made himself look worse...He doesn't need anymore beating from me...He's worthless...But I found this, and thought it was great...

That's just a great way of sticking it too the douchebag!

I also gave Notre Dame LB, Manti Te'o a beating...I'm standing by what I wrote...Sitting in a room with his lawyer, feeding Jeremy Schaap a story, off camera, doesn't make him look any bit innocent to me...Even if he was fooled, he continued to do interviews where he referenced his dead, fake, girlfriend...The kid is a scumbag...And he's going to pull a softy move just like Armstrong...My old friend from grade school who is a producer for Katie Couric, posted on facebook that Te'o will be on her show Thursday....These fucking guys...Unreal!  I hope she asks him what magazines he reads...She's used that before to trip some one up!

I do have some good news people...Very good news...Normally we think it's those Ivy League Schools, or MIT, or Stanford, that do the really important studies...Well, it's time to look outside the box people...Star looking at the studies they're doing at NC State...

Just so you know ladies...If you're not getting you one to two loads of semen a week, the Beeze is here for ya!

Lastly, the NHL is back after it's idiotic labor dispute...I'm not real pumped for it yet...I didn't see any this weekend...That's a whole other story...But I saw this, and got a little tingle...





Have a week...

The Beeze.

The NBA Can Eat My Ass!

Alright, I honestly pay no attention to Basketball during the regular season...And really, for most, if not all of the playoffs...But for some reason I found myself watching the Oklahoma City Thunder polish off the Lakers...Shit, the Thunder look good...So I started popping in on their games with the Spurs, and my built-in hatred for LeBron James, had me watching bits and pieces of the Heat and Celtics games...As these two series went on, I was watching more and more...And here are a few of my observations...

Basketball players are fucking pussies...It's not like these are a bunch of little guys...Look at LeBron James...He's 6ft 8...250 pounds, and he cries like a bitch about any and all contact...But it's not just him...I've seen it in all these games...These fucking guys get bumped and bitch for foul calls...The slightest, shit is called a foul, and there is no consistency in how the refs call this shit...Fuckers in the media rave about what great athletes these fuckers are, and all I see is a bunch of cunts over 6-5, and 200 lbs. crying that some one touched them...These ass-hats couldn't handle playing a real contact sport like Hockey or football...

And the shit that is called for a foul is gay as fuck...A fucking guy from Miami drives to the basket, his arm brushes a Celtic, and it's a foul on the Celtic...WHAT!?! I saw Westbrook from OKC catch a pass in stride, and stop as soon as he had the ball, and some twat from the Spurs ran into him, and the refs call a foul on Westbrook...WHAT!?! Fucking James just threw his Shoulder into Rondo, and they called a foul on Rondo...WHAT!?!

This shit is retarded...And it's not like the refs in The NBA have the best rep, after one of them wrote a fucking book about fixing games...And how many fucking time outs do you get in Basketball...I swear to God it seems like each team gets 30...The last 4 minutes of a game takes a hour...Fuck you and play cunts! In Hockey, you get 1 time out, for the whole fucking game...Basketball is for twats!

And why the fuck does everyone talk about LeBron James...And why the fuck did he win the MVP...Fucking Kevin Durant just won his 3rd scoring title...He's 23 and has 3 scoring titles...Holy fuck the media is stupid...LBJ can suck balls...And no matter who wins the Heat Celtics series, they're fucking toast...The Thunder are fucking Monsters...Young, Hungry, more talented monsters then, the heat or Celtics can put out there with them...

Shit I was rooting for Boston, but after seeing THESE_3 videos, I'm hoping the Heat squeak in to the Finals...Then Durant can take James to fucking school...And fuck Dwayne Wade...He's a cheap shot throwing, cry-baby, clutch 3-point missing, bitch!

And as I sit hear ranting about how stupid, and shitty Basketball is, I glad to know, I'm not alone...I just found this clip from Bill Burr's podcast on Monday...




See, Bill gets it...Too Bad Boston's retarded mayor doesn't have a clue...Could you people vote this moosh mouth out already...What a fucking idiot...




Basketball and Mayor Menino can all Eat My Ass!

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

They're getting really good at throwing Championship parties in Boston! Nice B-Cups!


Yeah, they have every right to run smack...Boston has been doing some serious ass-kicking over the last ten years...I saw one sign being held by a little kid, that said something like, 'I'm 8 years old and I can die now!' Then it had Pats Championship checked off...Sox Championship checked off...Celtics Championship checked off...And Bruins Championship checked off...I'm just hoping to see 1 championship in the Cleve, before I drop dead!

I would have posted that picture, but I came across this one...


Like I said, they've got this Championship party thing down in Boston!

Oh and here's one for Burrows and his buddies in Vancouver...



Oh, how's your city doing assholes? What too soon? What a STAIN...

So now that Hockey's long-ass season is over, and we're waiting for Football, we have Baseball, and their grossly, way to long season to help kill the time...There has been all kinds of talk about realignment and rule changes and blah, blah, blah...Here's what I would do if I was the all-powerful, ruler of Baseball...

1. DH for everyone...Screw the National League and their purists...DH in both leagues creates more jobs...The Union would love it, and that's good 'cause at some point we're gonna need their support on something...With the rare exception, watching Pitchers hit is like watching a retarded monkey try to hump a Football...

2. Shorten the season...No more cold ass April games...Season will start in May...No more World Series on a cold October/November evening...Season will end 1st week of October at the latest, so passionate, purists can still say "Fall/October Classic"...

3. No Interleague play...The beauty of the "All-Star" Game and World Series is not having seen your opponent...Us vs. Them...These ass-hats want the "All-Star" game to count for home field in the World Series, then this adds to the competitiveness...

4. No fan voting for the "All-Star"...If it's gonna count, then the teams should be picked to make it count, and it should be played to count...And then you wouldn't have a douchebag like Jeter ahead of Asdrubal Cabrera in the voting...Since Cabrera is fucking killing it! Not just with the bat either...10 years ago, Jeter wouldn't have made this play the Cabrera made Sunday...




So that's my plan...What do you got?

Sunday was Father's Day...Often Father's Day seems like an afterthought to many people...Bu not at the Beeze's house...After I got up early with the baby, once everyone else woke up, the Mrs. sent me back to bed...About an hour and a half later, the Little Beeze woke me up and said, "Dad, don't come down stairs yet, I'm not done with your surprise!" I of course obliged, and went back to sleep...And hour later he woke me up, and put his wrapped up surprise in my face...I got up and opened it...My boy who loves his arts and crafts, made me a poster full of pictures of him and his sisters...I was very proud, and I was happy to see the pictures of him when he was much smaller and didn't swear so much!

The wife made dinner later in the day, which is always rare, and exciting...Yes, it was good...It a fun and restful day with the kids...What else can I ask for?

There is another Little Beeze story I have to share...Every Friday is Pizza night here...This week, when the delivery came, it was female driver...He heard the voice, and when I closed the door, he asked, "Was she hot!?!" I replied "No" He was bothered by this, assuming all women are hot, and asked why...I had to say, "she just wasn't." He really had a problem with this, so I told him, "Hot girls don't have to deliver pizza." The Mrs. didn't like this response, but come on now gang...It's true...

So the boy asked, "What is a hot girl?" SO I showed him the end of my blog from a couple weeks ago...You know the one, with Kate Upton doing the "Dougie"...This is a hot girl...




The wife again wasn't happy, when her 6 year old boy kept saying, "She's so hot!"


That's it for now...Have a week...

Later, The Beeze.

Back from Vacation (part 2)

So here is the second chapter of my family's vacation to Martha's Vineyard...If you missed the first one...Stop, scroll down, read it, then come back to this one...There is one thing I forgot to mention in that post...Right before we left we got the news on what the next little Beeze will be...It's gonna be a girl...Now to chapter 2...

So I had talked about my 5 year old son's ability to swear, and quality comedic timing...Well once he saw he had an audience that enjoyed what he was saying, he was all in...Kid couldn't stop swearing...e started quoting lines from the Family Guy Star Wars, "Blue Harvest"...Yes, I let him watch it! Bitch, Son of a Bitch, kick your Ass, kiss my Ass were flying around a lot...There was one F*ck you, when he was playing a game on my niece's iPod touch...We tried to ignore it, and didn't here it again...Oh, and the iPod touch, great to keep the kids occupied for awhile, and he was a wiz with it...Guess what he wants for his birthday?

DAY 2

All day on the beach...sandwiches, beers, ocean, throwing the football around...Good stuff...Although I almost wrecked my knee...I was covering my 14 year nephew, my Brother-in-law throws him a pass...I try to stop on a dime, hard to do in sand, and jump for it...I had it timed perfectly...Except my knee said no, and just buckled...I walked it off, then we saw my saw pull a chair right up to the water...Kid is smart...We crabbed a couple chairs and a couple beers and followed...


The other highlight from the boy, after riding in on some big waves, on a boogie board, he gets up, picks up the board, and says, "BULLSHIT!" It was hilarious...Dude was talking shit to the ocean, and I loved it!

DAY 3

This was the first day that I got down on vacation...Another day on the beach...As I said in the first chapter, I'm not a beach person...But I try to deal with it, this is more about the kids, and the wife, and family, then it is about be me...I'm okay with that...So I'm on the beach, and I'm trying to read a book...Except, with my son, you always have to be on high alert...I've always been a worst case scenario guy, so I tend to get tense and stressed easily...It's hard to get through a chapter, let alone a couple pages, when you feel like you have to keep your head on a swivel...Always making sure he stays out of trouble...Plus there is this constant, "hey dad!" or "hey mom!" ...Both my kids talk, a lot...

But my niece and nephew were great...They spent tons of time playing with my kids, and keeping an eye on them...Watching my 14 year old nephew with my 5 year old son was amazing...By the end of the trip, they were inseparable, and funny as hell!

DAY 4

We headed in to the town of Oak Bluffs...We wanted to get the kids out of the sun for a day...On the way in, the little Beeze started getting car sick...Everyone headed to the arcade, while the boy and I hit the bathroom...He was on the shitter for 15 or 20 minutes, crapped his brains out...Then I carried up the street to meet up with everyone else...I saw a sign for a place called SHARKY'S ...They also had a store...I pointed it out to him, and he got down and walked...I knew I was about to spend some money, but he had been feeling miserable, so if it picked him up a bit, I was in...We walk in the store, and it is a kid, shark lover, heaven...Shark f*cking everything! After about 20 minutes of checking everything out, he picked out a rubber toy, Great White Shark...

As we headed up the street to the arcade, he now had a little more pep in his step...He showed everyone his shark...Then he saw a "Terminator" video game and he wanted to play it...It had two guns...So I got $5 worth of tokens, and we dumped them all into that game...We were shooting the hell out of those bastards...When we were done, he said, "This is the best day ever!"

Sharks and pretending to shoot shit can make any bad day better...

That's all for now...Stay tuned...

Later, The Beeze.

Back on the Grid and Back from Vacation

This is right down the road from where we were for a week...The town of Aquinnah on Martha's Vineyard...It's also known as Gay Head, but we'll go with Aquinnah...Let me start by saying, I'm not a beach person...I don't swim, I never liked the whole hanging out in the sun getting skin cancer all day thing...Yes I always go to the worst case scenario...It's just never been my thing, but it is easier to do when you know you'll be drinking all day! It also helps to love hanging with the people you'll be there with, which I do...

This trip was important to my wife...She needed it...We couldn't really afford to spent the money we did with the baby on the way, but she needed to get away...She needed to relax, which she did...She needed to spend time with her sister, niece, nephew, and brother-in-law...Her parents were there too... Her family is great, and I love spending time with them, and it's always hard to leave...Once a year is not enough, and we are really trying to figure out a way to get there full time...Winning the Mega Millions would be the easiest way...Buying tickets today!

So I had no Internet for 10 days...My system was in shock...Although it was kinda nice, until I realized I had no control of my fantasy teams, I couldn't checkout my favorite sites, I couldn't blog, NO PORN!!! What was I gonna do? I got a notebook and kept a journal...Surprisingly as I read through at, I wasn't going nuts about not being able to tweet, check facebook, or YouGabSports...There are ups and downs in it...Like I said, I'm not a beach person...So I had a couple days where I was stir-crazy, but at the end of the week, I was bummed about leaving...

I'll be posting this in a few different segments...Here's the first...

TRAVEL DAY

We left on Thursday night, and stopped at a hotel in Rochester, NY. The next morning we got up and got on the road...6 hours left...Then it started raining...Every trip we have ever taken to Massachusetts, it's rained...I hate driving in the rain...Night time is worse, but it still sucks...It was 6 hours of hard, sideways, rain...Then of course the kids spent 4 of those hours asking if we were almost there yet? I never thought I'd say this, but for my birthday, I want a Minivan...Get those kids as far back as I can! Two hours in, the driver's side wiper broke...Got a new one at a rest stop...$18 dollars...Just the first screwing of the trip!

Now a public service announcement for the people driving through New York state and Massachusetts...If you are in the left lane, the fast lane, the passing lane...YOU SHOULDN'T BE STEPPING ON YOUR BRAKE PEDAL...DRIVE ASS-HATS!!!

45 minutes left, and we hit a traffic jam...Rain is pouring down...Traffic starts to pick up and this gash in front of me slams on her brakes...I get on mine, but I'm gonna at least tap her...I swerve slightly to the right where there is a gap in traffic, and then back into my lane...The car behind me got on his hard and went left...We both avoided a pile-up and people give us dirty looks and yell at us...I wanted to grab the woman in front of us and throw her in front a of a semi!

We get to my Brother-in-law and sister-in-law's house...We ordered Chinese food, which according to my wife is a tradition...The little Beeze was throwing around his favorite line from "Jaws"...Yes, he's see it, thanks to his mother...He's into Sharks big time right now...About a month ago he woke me up by saying Chief Brody's line right before he kills the shark..."Smile you son of a bitch." He was sharing this with his cousins, and they made sure he shared it with everyone...He was getting plenty of laughs with that, but he took to the next level at dinner...

He counted in Spanish for my brother-in-law, so then my B-I-N said something to him in Spanish...The Little Beeze looked at him, paused long enough to have the whole rooms attention, and said, "KISS MY ASS!" We were all laughing our asses off...It's hard to correct him when he shows that kinda perfect timing...My B-I-L was in a shocked, yet joyous place...The kid just knows how to make you laugh, and he kept us all laughing, except my near saintly, mother-in-law, who got up from the table and left the room...I think she laughed, but she didn't want to show it...

THE NEXT DAY (Saturday)

This day was all about packing up for the Vineyard, loading up on booze and groceries, and spending money...The little Beeze and I showed the rest of the family the "drinking out of cups" video...



...and much of that became a theme for the week...Besides, "Kiss my ass" and "Smile you son of a bitch"...

DAY 1

Sunday we head down to the Cape to catch our Ferry...It was a 8:15 AM boat...Now I tend to have some stomach issues early in the morning, so of course on our way down I had to pull into a MacDonald's and blow some mud...Kids again were asking how long? God help me...We get there about 10 minutes before our boat left...40 minutes on the boat, the stomach calmed down and the kids enjoyed the ride...We got on the Island, and had to kill a couple hours...We don't get the house until noon...Killing time means killing money...The Little Beeze got a fishing game in some store...Then he wanted a copy of the book...Wait for it..."Jaws"...Kid is obsessed...Then we hit a candy/ice cream store...Pure Heaven for kids...Okay, us adults didn't mind much either!

We got to the house, unpacked, loaded up a couple coolers, and hit the beach...Yes, this place comes with a private beach...The kids were loving it...They both had so much fun in the ocean, and so much fun with their cousins...They didn't want to come out of the water...The Little Beeze has never been on a boogie board, but he looked like a pro...He was riding the hell out of that thing!

It was great seeing the kids so happy and having so much fun!

The evening closed with a traditional card game her family plays...Little Beeze asked by his cousin if he ripped a fart...He replied by pointing and saying, "Next time my fart gets stuck, you can rip it out!" Everyone laughed, and just then the glow of the sunset shined right on my mother-in-laws face, reminding us of what sinners we are...

After that it was off to bed...There's plenty more to come...

Later, Beeze

I Should Be in Boston

I've felt this way for awhile now...But after last night, I know it's true...I should be in Boston! In case you missed Monday Moaning , yes, I'm rooting for the Celtics...

Last night was great at the Beeze House...First I watched The Bruins beat the Flyers and take a 2-0 lead in the series...Anytime the Flyers lose, it's a good thing! Then the Wife and I had some good ole fashioned pregnant sex...Don't have to worry about where I blast for 8 months!

After that we enjoyed watching the Celtics beat up on LeBron, his stupid elbow, and the rest of the Cavs...

So far 2 wins for the town I hope to live in one day, soon. Then I popped on the end of the Red Sox game...Shocked, and excited I was...As the Sox put up 17 runs...Holy $h!t they started hitting!

Some of you may wonder about a Clevelander being such a Boston fan...1st, I blame my wife...She's originally from Boston, so the first time we went there, we had been married for a few months...I would be meeting her sitsers and their families for the first time...They were all great to me, and treated me like they had known me for years...Then my brother-in-law started his Boston Sales pitch...Showing every bit of greatness the City had to offer...Hell this was before the Sox had broken the curse...When you compare cities...Boston vs. Cleveland...the Cleve doesn't stand a chance...



2nd, I've grown tired of the poorly run sports franchises in Cleveland...You can try any excuse you want...I know them all, I've used them myself...But these teams have been mismanaged for years...Yes, the Cavaliers have turned it around, but that never would have happened if LeBron James hadn't fallen in their lap...

Don't worry, when it comes to hockey, The New York Rangers are still my team...But once they were no longer in it, I jumped o with the Bruins for the playoff run...It would be morally bankrupt to root for Pittsburgh!

Oh, I'm sure this happens every where, but I've noticed it a lot lately...Can you stop saying "WE" when talking about your city's sports team...I must have heard 5 people today, while talking about the Cavs losing to the Celtics, and having to hear my taunts, say, "We played awful lst night." Really? What f**king position were playing last night dummy? Oh, you weren't...Then stop saying "WE"...You're a fan, you did nothing! If you're not on the team, you aren't part of the "WE".

Now, all I need is for the housing market to recover, just long enough for me to sell my house...Sadly, my wife that works for Wells Fargo says that may be a longer wait then we would like... Here's something positive to close with...

Okay, Boston haters...Have at it...

Cleveland lovers, do your worst...

Later, The Beeze.

Boston Trip (volume two)

So the day after we arrived in the great state of Massachusetts...We went into Boston...Every time we do this I am wowed...When you live in Cleveland and then go to a BIG city...A real city...It blows you away...My town is a joke for a reason, and it's made clear to me every time I roll into Boston...

This time we went to check out the USS Constitution, also known as "Old Ironsides"...For those who don't know the Constitution is the country's oldest commissioned ship... Here's a shot of it's back end...

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Then we went over to the Constitution Museum....http://www.ussconstitutionmuseum.org/ I was surprised at how much the kids enjoyed it...If your kids like climbing on stuff they'll have some fun there...

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Then we went over and checkout the USS Cassin Young...Walking around this ship, you get a greater respect for what our sailors do...When I went into the galley...WOW! I've worked in some small kitchens, but Damn! This little sweat box is designed to pump out food for the whole ship...But my God it must get hot in there...

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The sleeping quarters were pretty tight and stuffy too...It can't be easy living on ship like that...So to all the men and women in the Navy...God Bless You!

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I can't forget my thought while standing next to some of the weapons on this destroyer...They can really f**k some shit up! And this is just a destroyer...I can't imagine the fire power on a battleship...

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And While we were down there...I had to snap a shot of the TD Banknorth Garden...
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After that we headed to Quincy Market for lunch...We ate a place called Quincy's Place...They're a Ice Cream, Candy, and Sandwich place...I had a great bacon cheeseburger with fries...Then everyone started mooching around...I hit a LIDS kiosk and scored another Sox cap...This one is a blueish gray...Except for the two front panels...they're tan...It's sweet!

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Then the little Beeze and I went back into Quincy's Place...He wanted ice cream...Chocolate...I ordered a shake for myself...Which the lovely young lady behind the counter politely corrected me...What I wanted, is called "Frappe" in Boston...I apologized, having been taught that by my wife, I said..."I'm sorry, I forgot...I'm from Cleveland." That got her chatting about Trot Nixon with me, since he played a season here...Everyone loves Trot...How can ya not! (I'm sorry...That rhymed, and sounds gay!)

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Then little Beeze and I went to meet up with the rest of the group, which was my wife and daughter...My sister-in-law, brother-in-law, niece, and nephew...They were all out front, watching the "Yo-Yo guy." Dude could do some wicked yo-yo tricks!

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He said that normally his wife performs with him, but she was at home with their newborn baby...We were thinking he was full of sh!t...But then i checked out his website... http://www.yoyoshow.com/

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The kids loved it...The highlight was when he dragged my brother-in-law up to be an assistant...First he had him hold a match...Dude swung his yo-yo out there and lit the match...Then he stuck a quarter behind my b-i-l's ear, and knocked it out...It was funny...Funny, because it wasn't me!

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After that....You'll have to wait for tomorrow...I gotta go now...The wife is on me to get something productive done...

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Later, The Beeze

Back So Soon!?!?

Well, I'm back...The family is too...We had a great time and spent too much money...I plan on sharing all the details in multiple posts...So here's #1...

We got in a few hours ago...The drive is a b!tch...But the way home wasn't as bad as the trip there...

Little Beeze suddenly became care sick just before we got to Buffalo...He kept looking worse and worse...So we stopped somewhere between Buffalo and Rochester...We went to a Red Roof Inn...It was full...Full on a Wednesday night, in nowhere New York! WTF!?! So then we went to a Motel 6, because they left the light on...Except for the one in our room...Seriously...The light when you first walk in and flip the switch...Not working...Nice...1/4 of a roll of toilet paper in the room...Awesome! F**k Motel 6!!!

20 minutes later little guy is feeling okay...What the hell? So we all get some sleep and we'll hit the road early...A couple hours in...He's feeling sick again...just as we're getting to a rest stop...He Pukes all over himself, the seat, the floor...Wow did that suck...We clean him up...Get him changed...Clean up the van the best we can...What does he say? "Can get an ice cream cone?" "NO!" I say...My wife chimes in with a "Honey you just threw up. You gotta wait until you're better." Little did we know...he was...That is until we got back on the road...

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Hour later, he's not looking so good... Stop...Puke...Drive...Stop...Puke...Drive...Stop...Puke...Oh this vacation is gonna be awesome! Each time after he puked...He was asking for something to eat...Everytime he was out of the car...he was fine...So the 10 hour drive took a little longer then expected...

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Once we arrived at my Sister-in-law's house...He was fine, and having a blast with his cousins and their dog...The four adults all put our heads together and decided that it had to be car sickness...This was cured for the trip home today with drugs...

Thank God for Chewable Dramamine...We told him it was candy...He took it, and he slept for almost 6 of the 10 hours...And he's sleeping now...See people...Sometimes drugs are good!

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That's all for now...Came home to find out the Central Air unit is p!ssing all over the basement floor...Like We've got the money to fix that now!

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Later, The Beeze.

Going on Vacation

Well gang...The Beeeze Family leaves tomorrow evening, after I get done at the Fish House...Getting away to see family and friends in Boston, and Cape Cod...The Beeze will be off the grid for a week...No twitter...No facebook...No Beezewax...No You Gab Sports...Just drinking, spending quality time with the family, and enjoying a great city....

I can't wait to get there...Just gotta get through that 10 hour drive...Take it easy..."I'm shipping up to Boston!"




Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

How's it going gang? Time for so more Monday Moaning...here's how the weekend started....It all began with a nice steady snow fall Friday afternoon, that carried on through Saturday night...Friday night I spent some quality time talking trash with my brother-in-law in Boston....The Cavs were playing the Celtics, and even though I don't really keep up on basketball, and I don't really care for LeBron, (that whole wearing a Yankees hat thing) I'll never pass on a chance to talk $h!t....

Next, Saturday started with some snow shoveling, so I could get to work...After work was more shoveling and playing with the kids in the snow...they love this crap...The evening was filled with watching Football, and Hockey...I can't believe the Cardinals beat the Panthers....And so convincingly...I knew the ex-Browns, I mean Ravens could handle their business against the Titans....they are looking hard....

Saturday night we found out our son is a bit of a freak like his old man...It was time to get ready for bed, and he wasn't listening to my wife....Now 99% of the time I'm the "bad cop", beacause he just laughs at her...Well she starts getting mad and tries to be the "bad cop"...."Tomas if you don't start listening I'm gonna spank you!"...Now for the record she doesn't spank...he knows this...So what does he do....He turns around, bends over, and says...."spank me, spank me, spank me hard." I couldn't stop laughing...My wife was in tears she was laughing so hard....Although ther could have been a little sadness there too...Now that she realized her son is a perv like his old man....

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On the Hockey front, there's something that's been bothering for awhile now....each week I watch Hockey Night in Canada...I'm not Canadian, but from what I know, it was always a big deal for our neighbors to the north...But what's bugging me is that 99% of the time, the Prime-time game is a Maple Leafs game...There's other teams in Canada fellas, try spreading the love around...By the way, the Leafs aren't that good...Please stop cramming them down our throats....

My beloved New York Rangers lost Friday in a shoot out against Buffalo...Saturday they came back strong and blanked the Ottawa Senators....






Then Sunday came, and so did I....Oh sorry...More fun out in the snow with the monsters...My son hasn't figured out how to snowball fight yet...He seems to like getting hit...He makes a very good target...My daughter was getting revenge finally for all the crap he gives her...He took one in the face, that gave him a shiner and he was just laughing....The kid is insane...
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After that it was time for more football....The Eagles got it done again, and I know I shouldn't but, I'm saying they're going to the "Super Bowl"...I'm so glad the Giants lost....I can't stand Eli Manning, or the whole Manning family for that matter....Then the Steelers knocked off the Chargers...They seemed to be firing on all cylinders today...Ravens vs Steelers next week....This is gonna be a good one folks.....



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Next up, my favorite part...Notre Dame Hockey....This weekend the Fighting Irish took on the Nanooks from Alaska....
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Friday the Irish won 2-0...The goal scorers were....Ryan Thang, and Senior, captain Erik Condra....Goalie Jordan Pearce made 16 saves to earn the shutout, and the victory.
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Saturday night Pearce recorded his 4th shutout of the season, and 8th of his career on, as the Irish beat the Nanooks 3-0....The goal scores were...Christian Hanson, Ben Ryan, and Ryan Thang.

This weekends victories take the #1 ranked Irish to a 18-3-2 record....Next weekend Notre Dame travels to Lake Superior State for two games.
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I hope everybody had a good weekend...I'll catch you later,
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The Beeze.
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One more thing...TCP, you may want to check this out for your little, and anyone else who has a Thomas the train fan in their house.....
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http://thomasthetankenginefriends.blogspot.com/

The Beeze's Happy New Year, Hump day Survey

Happy New Year!!! It's time for a quick Hump Day Survey...Here we go...

1. Who will win the Rose Bowl?

a. Penn State

b. USC

2. Were the Jets right in firing Mangina?

3. Should the Browns hire Mangina?

4. Who will win in the Baltimore vs Miami playoff game?

5. Who will win in the Atlanta vs Arizona platoff game?

6. What is your best memory of 2008?

Mine is of our trip to Boston this fall for the little Beeze's birthday.

7. On this New Years Eve I'm skipping the Traditional 7th question....It's New Years Eve, just get out there and Hump somebody.

Happy New Year!!!

Later, the BEEZE