Monday Moaning

This week we'll start where we should...It's Memorial Day, and the only reason many of us aren't at work, and taking the kids to a parade, and firing up the grill, and knocking back some beers with friends and family, is because of the brave men and women who have served our country, and far too many lost their lives...So take a moment to stop and think of them...Think of their families that don't get to spend this day with them...And be thankful for the life you have...If you see a veteran, shake their hand, let them know you're thankful...

I want to share a clip from the show, "The West Wing"...Martin Sheen had better speech writers then anyone...While the storyline doesn't have anything to do with Memorial Day, I think it works anyways, and it fits where we are as a country...



Now, I will move on to much less important things...First, Phillies, pitcher Roy Halladay threw the 20th perfect game in MLB history on Saturday night, as the Phillies beat the Marlins 1-0...Gotta suck if you're Marlins pitcher Josh Johnson, who pitched seven innings, with 6 strikeouts, and 0 earned runs...Oddly, I don't give a shit about Halladay's perfect game...Maybe because it was Hallady, and he's a great pitcher...When Dallas Braden did it just a couple weeks ago, it was exciting, it was fun, and it was against a really good team (Tampa Bay)...Maybe it's just 'cause I hate Philly!

Speaking of Philly, Saturday Night the Stanley Cup Finals started...In the battle which goalie could suck more...Philly won that part, as the Chicago Blackhawks beat the Flyers 6-5...For years now the NHL has been trying to get the goal scoring up...This series may be the marketing gold they've been looking for, because neither of these two teams wanted to play defense Saturday...The rest of the series should be interesting...

In our HOLY F**KING SHIT MOMENT of the week, we have Indians pitcher David Huff, taking an A-Roid line drive off the head...



The ball went off his head and into right field! Indians 1st baseman Matt Laporta said, "I panicked, I didn't know if I should go for him or the ball."
Surprisingly Huff is okay...He was released from the Hospital the same day...Cat scans were negative...

In the NBA, the Finals have been set...The Celtics and the Lakers...The league's second choice, after LeBron and the Cavaliers shit the bed...Predictions have started, and I'll go with this one I saw on twitter...

"MrRaineMaida: so there it is....lakers/celtics...i can feel kobe stressin!!! boston in 6!"

This leads to my next topic...I've been enjoying twitter this week...All the celebrity douche bags come out of the woodwork when some one dies...And they were going strong when the news of Gary Coleman's passing broke...The douche-baggery was making me sick, until I saw, Opie from the Opie & Anthony Show just blasting these dolts...He's been beating on Ashton Kutcher all week for his douche bag tweets, but Friday he was killing it!

"OpieRadio: Question @aplusk(Kutcher) Were you a fan of his dwarfism, his weak kidneys, the fact that he had NO money when he died or his loneliness?"

"Opie Radio: Hey @janetjackson You can at least take solace in the fact that Michael will have a knee for the little fella to sit on."

"OpieRadio: Hey @paulaabdul you slur-ring space cadet! He had no family! He hated his own parents. Don't you have a cartoon to dance with?"

Even jesus got in on the fun...Yes people, jesus tweets...

"jesus: Was sent a tip to remind Michael Jackson that Gary Coleman is not a child."

And I can't forget Kenny Powers take on Gary Coleman's death...

"KFUCKINGP: Can't believe that little black kid died. Guess that deal with the devil to stay young forever didn't fucking pan out too well."

Sadly Gary got upstaged Saturday by Denis Hopper...But don't worry big guy, that's the only mention I'll give that old hippy!

Those were some good tweets...I just pimp blogs, and tweet goofy shit like this...

"TheBeeze34: Is it wrong that I want to squeeze one off as I watch @maddow sexually dominate @secupp while @andylevy and @JimNorton do the play-by-play?"

Okay, enough of the twitter nonsense...

After finding out we were going to have another child I started doing some serious thinking...This wasn't in the plans...We're kinda restarting with this baby thing...I was looking to get some perspective...So I pulled out a couple of old books...

The first was "On the Road" by Jack Kerouac...I don't know why, maybe just because some people love this book, and some people hate it...The first time I tried to read it, I was bored and thought it was crap, and never finished it...I thought, 'why not give it another try?' I get why people like it, and I get why people don't...I'm still undecided...That's because I was also mixing in, "The Expectant Father"...Essential reading for a new dad, and I felt I may need a refresher course...

Then I got Jay Mohr's "No Wonder My Parents Drank"...The wife had pre-ordered it months ago, before we even knew about this new bundle of joy...I have to say, it's Jay Mohr's book that seems to be helping the most...Yeah, he's famous, but he's a regular guy...They way he writes about being a father, is how I feel...Thoughts he's had, I've had...I'll be honest, I've been trying to make myself feel good about this...Push myself to be excited...Now, after only half of Mohr's book, I am excited...And I feel like I can do even better with this kid...How can I do worse then I have with the little Beeze...Kid copying every swear word I say, running around with his pants down, describing his little boner, "Look at my pee pee...It's huge!" Third time's a charm, RIGHT?

That's all for now gang...Have a safe and peaceful Memorial Day...



Later, The Beeze.

I'm Not Afraid of Muslims

Yes, I went there...

You see, I have had enough...This politically correct bullshit has got to stop...This week I have reached my breaking point...The news that a Muslim Community Center near Ground Zero is in the works has pushed me far enough...Now I'm pushing back, unlike the Manhattan community board that backed the proposal...Don't believe it? Click the LINK

Yes, I believe in the freedom to worship, and I believe in religious tolerance...But it's hard to be tolerant of people who are intolerant...Yes, I know, NOT ALL MUSLIMS ARE BAD PEOPLE WHO CRASH PLANES INTO BUILDINGS, AND WALK INTO CROWDED AREAS WITH A BOMB STRAPPED TO THEIR CHEST! The thing is, I never see a good Muslims getting on the news and calling out these bad Muslims for f*cking things up for the rest of them...WHY? Really, I'm asking you dopes, WHY DON'T YOU CALL THEM OUT? You'll call me out for this post, but you won't go after the dolt blowing people up, because he's an intolerant ass...Are you scared, like so many Americans, and people around the world?

A cartoonist pokes fun at Islam, and has to fear for his life...South Park rips on the Muslim religion, as they do to all religions, and they get death threats...Funny how it seems nobody has a problem laughing at Father John Kid Toucher jokes, but don't mention Muhammad...

Muslim extremists hijack planes and crash them into The World Trade Center...Day in and day out all we see and hear about the Muslim faith is hate...Yet we are suppose to be tolerant...We are suppose to let a Muslim Community Center be build right next to the place that has become the crowning achievement for nut-job, asshole,Muslim Extremists...I don't think so pal...

This is a slap in the face to all the families who lost loved ones on September 11th...Bin Laden heard about this, and now he is pointing and laughing...If this happens, guess what? The terrorists won!

The people who keep saying not all people of the Muslim faith are bad, need to get these good Muslims in front of cameras and microphones...They need to finally admonish Muslim extremists...People of New York need to stand up and say NO! You won't build this here! We won't be threatened anymore! We won't be politically correct! We're done appeasing everyone!

I sure as hell am!

I'm the Beeze, and I approve this message!

Scary How Little Has Changed in 30 Years

There are very few cable news shows I still watch...But on occasion you can actually find some real news...One of the best in my opinion is The Rachel Maddow Show...Yes, she is on the uber-lefty MSNBC, but she is more then willing to jump all over liberals, including the PRESIDENT, when they are out right lying, or just being dumb...So for that, her honesty, and her intelligence, I enjoy watching her show...

Last night on her show I learned that in the 30 plus years since an oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, back in 1979, nothing has changed...We are not prepared at all for a major oil spill...Watch, it's f**king scary!




I would have to assume that a major factor in this, is that we don't police oil companies...We have let them done whatever they want, and now we are gonna pay for it, in more ways then one...We're also letting them take charge of the cleanup...How about they pay for it, and we get somebody who has a clue on how to fix these problems...

Throughout this post, I keep saying we...I have nothing to do with the oil business except for a customer...I'm not a member of any oversight committee...I f**king should be! I keep using we, because it's time for us to start calling out our elected officials...It's time for them to stop lining their pockets, and start doing the job they were elected to do...These dolts work for us...They don't see it that way anymore...We have to make them see it...

I'm the Beeze, and I approve this message!

More Douchebaggery From Westboro Baptist Church

Yes, I'm here to write about the Westboro Baptist Church...These f**k-tards have been out of the news for a little bit, and they have a great excuse to get back in there...The passing of Heavy Metal singer, Ronnie James Dio...That's right, Westboro Baptist Church will be ProtestingDio'sFuneral ...You know, because Heavy Metal=EVIL!

You see, the Westboro Baptist Church has made it's name by protesting funerals...Their favorite funerals to protest? Those of fallen American soldiers...They stand outside, or across the street from the funeral with their anti-America, anti-gay, anti-Jew, anti-f**king everyone signs, and taunt the friends and family of the fallen...

I have always supported free speech...I have often blogged about it's importance...And while that part of me feels these assholes have the right to say what they want...There's another part of me that thinks the only right they should have, is the right to stop breathing...If it wasn't for the soldiers who have continued to sacrifice their lives for this country for generations, f**k-stains like these people wouldn't have free speech to fall back on...

It's not Ronnie James Dio, or Heavy Metal that are evil...It's the Westboro Baptist Church...I don't know who the f**k their hate filled god is, but my God would let Dio sing in his church anytime...

-

Oh, and little word of advice to these wastes of sperm...When you protest a military funeral, you're dealing with a number of very disciplined people...And you've been lucky that you haven't taken the beating/bullet to the head, you deserve...But now, you're may get a different animal...Some die hard Dio fan from Iowa is gonna spend two paychecks from his shit job, stocking shelves at the grocery store, to pay his last respects to one of his idols...He's gonna see you f**k-sticks, and not give...Not one drop of discipline in this guy...And he's gonna bash your head in...And I will applaud him, and the only bit of regret I'll have, is that I wasn't there to help him...

-

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

So why am I starting this week's post with that picture...Why not? They're delicious and they look alike...Just had me, and that's a hell of a sandwich! But honestly, I've had Katy Perry's song, "I Kissed a Girl" stuck in my head for two days...And I'd love to see her kissing Zoe, as I'm in the corner abusing myself!



Sorry folks, but I'm pretty horned up this week...Maybe If we talk a little sports it'll take my mind off of it...

First there was Hanley Ramirez booting a ball into the outfield, not hustling after it, and talking sh!t about his manager, because the manager yanked him from the game for being a douche...Then Saturday Nyger Morgan of the Nationals almost made a great play on a fly ball...It looked like he was gonna take away a home run...But he botched it, and had a temper tantrum...Instead of keeping his head in the game and going after the ball, he threw his glove and acted like a pissy little kid...Afterward he said he thought the ball bounced off him and went over the fence...Nonetheless, he looked like a dolt!



Another somewhat big story in Baseball...Astros pitcher Roy Oswalt wants to be traded...Who wouldn't want to leave that team? He feels he only has a couple years left, and want to be on a team that can contend...Now the question is, what teams are gonna be going after Oswalt?

Other baseball news, I spent a lot of time this weekend playing some ball with the kids...Spring training at the Beeze house...My daughter was catching the ball well, in her dress, and Hannah Montana bike helmet...But she throws like a girl!

The little Beeze was fielding like that hack Marco Scutaro...He's no Ryne Sandberg like his old man...But he's got a good arm...I told him, there's no DH's in this house...Gold Glove or you're running laps...

Since I mentioned I mentioned Red Sox shortstop Marco Scutaro, I have hit another topic involving the Red Sox...This past week the Sox cut loose lefty Scott Schoeneweis, the day before the one year anniversary of his wife's death, do to a drug overdose...I know business is business, and that Schoeneweis had been pitching like crap, but damn, that seems pretty cold blooded to me...Am I getting soft in my mid 30's?

Now on a very sad note, former major league pitcher, Jose Lima died Sunday at the age of 37, from a heart attack...Lima had just a few really good years, but it seemed like everyone loved him...His personality on and off the field became legendary...Rest in Peace "Lima Time"

In Basketball, The Celtics are beating the living sh!t out of the Magic...Right now they have a 3-0 series lead, and the Magic look stunned...I wonder if they'll just tap out like Lebron and Co. did?

The other Basketball story people have been talking about...A ref...A stupid ref, named Joe DeRosa tossed a ball at a fan that was giving him sh!t...What did the league do...One game suspension...Something tells me, if this was a player, the penalty would have been harsher...It's time to start smacking refs, and umpires around more when they f**k up...They represent the game, and the league too...What do I care? It's basketball...

In the NHL, the Chicago Blackhawks swept the San Jose Sharks...It seemed like this might be the year for the Sharks...Then they ran into the Blackhawks, and got steamrolled...I wasn't sure about the 'Hawks goaltending, but Antti Niemi stepped up big time...Now Chicago will wait to see
who they'll face in the finals...The way the Philly, Montreal series has gone, it will most likely be the Flyers, unless the Habs can pull off what the Flyers did to Boston...But I don't see that happening...

Next up, cycling...WHAT!?! Last week Floyd Landis admitted to being a cheating piece of crap...Then threw Lance Armstrong under the bus too...First, as an American I must say this...WHO THE F**K CARES!?! You're riding bikes, and I could give a sh!t...(sorry EK) Second, throwing some one else under the bus like that is a gash move! Third, I could give a sh!t about Lance and his stupid yellow bracelets...Don't be a b!tch Floyd, just because he can ride a bike better then you, and he's only got one nut...I wouldn't be surprised if all these silly, wannabe frenchies, have cheated...And stop leaving your bike in the driveway!

One more note about the Little Beeze...Sunday morning we were all hanging out, watching TV, and all the sudden he pulls down his pants and says..."Why does my pee pee keep getting bigger?" The wife and I looked at each other, and tried to hold in our laughter...I finally told him, "If you keep pulling on it, that's what's gonna happen." He seemed to be pulling on it more the rest of the day!

Now we're gonna close with something different...You all should know by now, that I'm always searching for odd, and messed up stuff...Well it seems there is a trend in porn these days...Beard Porn...Here's a video from a couple of the guys from the Ron and Fez show, on beard porn...



Thats just some creepy, sick, sh!t.

Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.

Some Hump Day Rants

Okay, so I started this last night...I got sidetracked...Had an important call I had to take...Sorry it's a day late...

It's Hump Day and I need to do some ranting about a few things...

First, people say I am disrespectful towards Cleveland...Well I think this VIDEO is disrespectful...The fact that City, and County officials, and the Governor took time out of their jobs to make this crap! Do your jobs assholes! Oh, and LeBron is gone...Give it up!

Next HSBC...My wife got a new HSBC credit card...She got it because it had a offer for a balance transfer...She got a $1000 limit, then transferred $500 from a couple other cards with high rates...Then they lowered her credit limit to $300 without telling her...Then they did the balance transfer...Then she got a call saying she was over limit...Listen f**k-tards, don't piss off a pregnant woman...She kept getting passed from one person to another...Each of them got an ear full...Did it help? Not at first...

Then I picked up the line and informed the 4th gash that my wife was speaking to, that I was Mrs. Beeze's lawyer, and everything was being recorded...Including the last costumer service agent, who said, "That's wrong. We can't do that. We'll get this fixed." I informed her the better business bureau had already been contacted, and we would be seeking legal action if this problem was not resolved immediately...

They raised her credit line to $750, and waived any and all fees...Then an hour later, the wife closed the account...HSBC, go F**k yourself!

After that The Mrs. and I went to the movies...We saw IRON MAN 2...I was hoping for a popcorn handy, but no such luck!...The movie was good...Like many sequels, it wasn't as good as the first one...But it was good...I kept hearing Mickey Rourke was great...Not really people...He looked like a creep and mumbled some Russian from time to time...Not hard considering he already looks like a creep, and mumbles half the time already...

You know who was good? Scarlett Johansson! She is delicious!

Ryan Reynolds rules! He's a good actor...Funny as hell...And he gets to pop that!





Now, onto some baseball...I'm a Red Sox fan, but I gotta say, I find it just insane that the Red Sox and Yankees are constantly on ESPN and the MLB Network...yes, they mix in a Mets game, and a couple games from the Phillies and Cardinals...But that's it...And people wonder what the hell is this East Coast bias that people speak of...Give me a little variety...Hell the way the Sox are playing, I may as well watch the Indians blow games!


Next up, Connecticut Attorney General, and Candidate for the senate, Richard Blumenthal has been caught in a lie...Not a little white lie either...This prick has been repeatedly talking about his service in Vietnam...One problem...He never served in Vietnam...He got at least 5 known deferments...If there was ever a douche he need a thorough skull f**k, it's this ass-hat! Now he says he mis-spoke...Yeah, the whole part where you said I served in Vietnam! F**k-stick!


Lastly, If you know me, you know I don't like the Philedelphia Flyers...Some I'm holding out hope that the Montreal Canadiens can pull out a victory...



Although I wouldn't pull out of this Hab!


Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

There are certain things that fathers pass down, from generation, to generation...One of those things that my old man passed down to us was, Duct Tape can fix almost anything!

And well, after this past week, I've realized that there are a lot of people out there, whom it would serve well, if they spent some time Duct Taped to a chair!

You see, I've had bit of a battle this past week with some people at Sporting News...That's where I first started blogging...I still post there once a week...This past Wednesday I wrote a blog blasting LeBron James, the Cleveland Indians, and the City of Cleveland...My displeasure with the city I live in is well documented...I re-posted it at SN...This post rubbed people the wrong way...One person who lives in Washington state, but calls herself a Clevelander was very unhappy about it...She responded and called me an "Underachieving Jerk"...Not really that harsh, but I reacted, as I often do, by over-reacting, and going for the throat...

This lead to many people blasting me, and ignoring the point of my blog, and that she provoked me...So I posted another blog, trying to get people to understand where my opinion was coming from, and backing it up with facts...It didn't matter...They kept coming after me, and some taking shots at You Gab Sports, even though I was the only Gab member involved in this...

So this lady posted a blog about the incident, and apologized, while still getting in some jabs...More people commented and blasted me...I responded, and apologized for what I called her, but nothing else...We both seemed to be done with it...But since then 3 blogs have been posted by 2 people, about it...And well, about how I'm the asshole...

I had planned on walking in here with my gasoline shoes on,and dropping matches all over the place...I was ready to light everyone up, and continue burning bridges...
But then, this afternoon I realized, it's not worth it...1. that's what they want...They want me to go off, so they can keep poking at me, and say what asshole I am...2. There's no winning...I'll never change their minds, and they sure as hell aren't gonna change mine...So f*ck it!

You know what, I will win...Because they're still gonna come and read my blogs...They can't wait for the next one

Say hi to Lindsay Marie...

(yes it's random, but some people will get it)

Moving on...I had another losing day at the track as Lookin at Lucky won, and my horse Jackson Bend came in third...I also had money on Dublin, who shit the bed right out of the gate...Sorry Little Beeze, you may have to get a job soon! Especially after signing the kids up for swimming lessons today...Last year our local rec center, funded by our tax dollars, charged $23 dollars a kid, for lessons...This year $40...this really pisses me off because they cut the rec center hours 6 months ago to save on the costs...This is what happens when your Mayor is drunk and sexually harassing people all the time!

Then we signed the little Beeze up for T-Ball...that was $35...Then the lady started pushing me to coach...Apparently they haven't had many volunteers...So I agreed...I don't know how good our team will be, but we'll have the best swearing bunch of 5 and 6 year olds around!

But at least I won't be teaching them to shake their asses like a bunch of cum dumpster strippers...In case you haven't seen this shit, I'll let you check it out, then I'll break it down like John Madden, without blowing Brett Favre...



I'll start by saying this...For 7 year olds, they dance well, and you can even see a bit of gymnastics in play here...But they're dressed like strippers! They're 7 years old, and dressed like strippers! I know how strippers dress! Then there is the song selection...Beyonce's "Single Ladies"...The basic idea of the song, at least what I get out of it before I turn it off, is it's suppose to be an empowering song for women...But every time you see women or girls dancing to it...They're dancing like strippers...Dirty cum bucket strippers...And this f**king crowd is loving it...'Look honey, Our little girl is gonna be rockin' the pole one day!' And I'm the asshole!?!

In hockey news, Friday night the Boston Bruins finished off an epic fail...After taking a 3-0 series lead over the Flyers...the boys from Philly came back to win 4 in a row...As much as it hurts, I have to give the Flyers some credit...They continued their winning ways, blowing out Montreal 6-0 in the first round of the conference finals...

In the West, Chicago took a 1-0 series lead after beating San Jose 2-1...This series is packed full of talent...San Jose has collapsed repeatedly in the playoffs, but seem to have it together this year...Chicago is young, and I don't have a lot of faith in their goatending...I see this one going seven games, and being a real knock-down, drag-out fight...

On the home front, we're still looking at names...I think we've settled on a girls name...Molly Kathleen...For a boy, Finn is the front runner, but we needs solid middle name for that...Yeah, I'm Irish if you couldn't tell!

This pregnancy has been a tougher on the wife...the first two she never got sick...This time she's puking a bit, and feeling run down...Although the 20 hours of OT she worked last week doesn't help that...All of this isn't helping me need for sex either...I'm spending even more time at xHamster ****(before you click that, it's a porn site)****

This next video I had to share...Countdown with Keith Olbermann pulled this from The Daily Show...Olbermann seems to have lost his marbles, but this may have been the most sanity his show has aired in awhile...It's Lewis Black, losing his shit over how f**king insane and obsessed with Nazis Glenn Beck is...Olbermann and Beck should get together and choke each other out!

Christ, one day Black is gonna have a heart attack on stage!

Now, on a sad note, Sunday singer Ronnie James Dio died after battling Cancer...He was 67 years old, and had one of the most incredible Rock & Roll voices ever...Rest in Peace.

Later, The Beeze.

Grinning From Ear to Ear

Well it happened! I won my bet with a co-worker from the Fish House...The Celtics won, just as I said they would!

I have to say, I was a little surprised by how the Cavaliers played...I can't believe the number of turnovers in the game...The Celtics D'ed up, but it wasn't all the Celtics...The Cavs couldn't hold onto the ball...9 turnovers by James...

Then at the end of the game, the Cavaliers gave up...No hustle...No trying to foul, and see what they can do...They just gave in to defeat...Hell, it looked like they gave up Tuesday night!

There's no doubt in my mind that LeBron will be leaving...I assumed it years ago...And I really don't care...Clearly I'm not a Cavaliers fan, and honestly, I'm not a basketball fan...This is the most basketball I have watched in years...And now I remember why I don't like it...Foul after foul...Maybe it's the hockey in me, but my god, some one gets touched ever so gently and it's a foul! I need more contact...More contact without a foul being called, and without these giants putting on their whining little b!tch face about it every time...

Now that I got to see the Celtics take down "The King", and I will be collecting some money tomorrow, I'm done with basketball...That is until I make another bet!

Later, The Beeze.

Witness...Me Laughing

HAHAHAHA! Wait, this guy does it better...



That's right I'm a Clevelander, happy about the Cavaliers losing last night to the Celtics...I think I've made my loyalty clear lately, and it isn't to LeBron and The Cavaliers...Way to come out looking like the MVP last night...Douche-bag! Yeah I said it! Hey, "King James" why don't you go out to another restaurant, order an expensive steak, cooked well done, ask for ketchup, then ask the server to cut it for you, and finish the night by leaving a shitty tip!

Hey Cavs' fans...How does it feel to think that last night's performance could be LeBron's last one at "The Q"? Looks like the ECONOMY in Cleveland will be hitting the crapper some more....Again I laugh!

I know it drives some people crazy that I have become the anti-Clevelander...Tough shit! It doesn't matter where we live, or where we were born...It matters that we were born with freewill...A wonderful gift that lets us make choices in our life...The biggest choice I made as to be a realist, and not walk through life with blinders on...I'm willing to see the crap!

I also chose to cheer for teams from different cities...There is no law that says I must cheer for my hometown teams...I cheer for teams I like...I fell in love with hockey and the New York Rangers when I was very young...I had no idea the misery I was in for...I cheered for the Browns until they left...I tried to after the fake Browns arrived, but my God that has been a disgrace...I cheered for the Cubs when I was a kid...Why? Because WGN, afternoon Baseball, and Ryne Sandberg! I gave the Indians love too, but Mark Shapiro and Eric Wedge sucked the life out of that team, and I moved onto the Red Sox...Why? The wife, and the city is awesome...

I won't sit here blindly believing everything some dope politician tells me...Nor will I do it for some asshole owner, and his idiot GM...Since I mentioned them...In the past few years, the Indians traded away C.C. Sabathia, Cliff Lee, and Victor Martinez...The tribe got a couple below average outfielders...A horrible catcher...Some average pitchers...And some minor league junk...Martinez and Lee both still had another year on their contracts, but management felt this was the best they could get...Shapiro told the Red Sox he wanted Buchholz...The Sox said NO! Shapiro said okay...Same thing with the Phillies when he moved Lee...He wanted X ,Y & Z, and they said A, B, & Z...Shapiro took it...Why would I blindly follow this bitch anywhere...Now the Indians have starting lineup that has 3 players hitting .300 or above...The rest below .260...Go Screw!

Yes, I'm a Clevelander...Yes, I'm a sports fan...I'm just not a Cleveland sports fan...And I'm not that big of a fan of Cleveland...At this point angry Clevlanders like to tell me to leave...I would love to! For God's sake I have found myself daydreaming about living in Rochester, New York, and stalking Lilly from the Brother Wease Show! But right now, life requires me to live here...

With that said, I laugh again, as I say Go Celtics!

Now let's close on a positive note...Here are three women I would have sex with...How about you!?!

Later, The Beeze.

The President Had His Say, Now I'll Have Mine

I had heard some talk about this on the radio today...But I like to be well informed...So of course I got online and starting searching the STORY ...Clearly by that link I found it!

So President Obama gave his two cents...Now I'll give mine...In the past I've supported him on issues...Others I haven't...I won't be supporting him on this...Why? Because he comes off as a ass! The opening of the article was all I need to be pissed...

"US President Barack Obama, in his latest criticism against modern media, expressed grief Sunday that in the era of iPads and Xboxes, information had become a diversion that was placing new stresses on democracy."

What!?! Now information is a bad thing!?!

While speaking to the graduating students at Hampton University, The President told them "the key to progress is education." Yet he also said, "You're coming of age in a 24/7 media environment that bombards us with all kinds of content and exposes us to all kinds of arguments, some of which don't always rank all that high on the truth meter.”"

Heaven forbid we be exposed to more the one view point...God knows I'm not gonna go with just what FOX News and MSNBC say...Because if MSNBC said the sky was blue, FOX would say it was red...If FOX said MSNBC was right, they'd say they were wrong! So yes Mr. President, those of us who try to stay informed will seek out more then one side of the story...

The President feels blogs and radio shows sharing their thoughts and opinions, puts "new pressures on you, it is putting new pressures on our country and on our democracy," Why? Because their view differs from yours...Because it may cause some one to think...Because they may have to click another link to try and get the whole story...If I can find a blog knocking you, I can find one praising you, and I know to take them both with a grain of salt...The President thinks so highly of the American people, that he doesn't think we can handle information from more then just the stupid cable news outlets...

Another thing that makes President Obama sound like a dolt to me on this topic...His campaign was so deeply rooted in technology, and getting the word out any and all ways...He started a TWITTER account...They started the WhiteHouse Twitter account...So clearly, it's okay when it works in his favor...But if it isn't, then it's bad!

Well Mr. President, it's official...You're a real politician, because you're acting like a f**king child!

I agree with President Obama on the importance of education...

I also agree with Thomas Jefferson's thoughts that, America can only work if each of us stays informed and engaged, if we hold our government accountable, if we fulfill the obligations of citizenship...So I'll keep my technology, so I can keep tabs on President Obama and all the other untrustworthy politicians in this country.

Later The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

You may be asking, what's with the opening pic...Let's not forget folks, this is "Monday Moaning"...And if she isn't moaning, she will be soon enough...But will get to that in a bit...

I was planning on starting out with some Baseball talk, but I didn't expect it to be this...

Sunday afternoon, Oakland A's lefty, Dallas Braden threw a perfect game...Braden, an average pitcher, with stuff, that isn't overpowering, shutdown Tampa Bay, earning the 19th perfect game in MLB history...

Braden, best known for telling A-Roid to "get off my mound" a couple weeks ago, after the cheating Yankee disrespected Braden, by trotting across the mound on his return to first base...Braden pulled no punches as he pointed out A-Roid's douche-baggery...The 'roid boy, tried to blow it off, and said, "let him enjoy his 15 minutes." Looks like he may get a few more c*nt!

Now the name Brayden has been on our list of Boys names...After today, if Dallas happens to break A-Roid's jaw, or shatters his knee-cap next time they meet...It's a done deal! Dude was great, and the fact that the first thing he wanted to do after Sunday's game, was hug his grandmother...Well that's just awesome...

Friday was a rough night for Boston fans, as the Red Sox got throttled by the Yankees...The Bruins lost to the Flyers...Don't worry, The B's will finish the boys from Philly off Monday night...Then the Celtics got thumped by the Cavaliers...

Well Rajon Rondo, his triple double, and the Celtics got that game back Sunday...series even a 2 games each...I'm sure it will go 7 games...And I'm still confident the Celtics will take it...

Damn though, Cleveland sports fans get fired up...Any slight glimmer of hope, that there could be a winner in this town, and these people go bat-shit crazy...And I just listen to the clock tick, and wait for the dreams to be dashed again...

Here are a few examples of Cleveland getting overly hopeful....

I call these dolts, "The Pasty Gangsters" 'We won't look so dorky and white, if we throw some wine and gold paint on with our stupid Andy Varejao wigs!' ...F**king f**k-stains!

Yes, we get it...We are all Witnesses...Witnesses to another deflating defeat! And soon you'll be a "Witness" to a lawsuit for copyright infringement...Oh, and then the city will hit you with a huge fine for illegal advertising! Enjoy!

'Hey guys, I got an idea...Let's put a Cavs headband on the giant dude, on the Lorain-Carnegie Bridge!' ...Really!?! This is just f**king gay...Don't get upset, people...Not 'put a c0ck in my mouth gay.' You know, 7th grade gay...How about this...It looks stupid! Henry Hering and Frank Walker are rolling over in their graves after some dope did this to their BRIDGE ...

Now a couple notes on the little Beeze...My boy is really excited about the upcoming baby...He wants to learn how to change diapers, and feed the baby...But the most exciting thing to him right now is this...As he puts it, with an amazing amount of energy in his voice..."I'm gonna be the middle child!!!" Yes, I have what I'm sure is, the first and only child to be totally excited about being the middle child...The Jan f**king Brady of the house, and he's pumped...God love him!

Another bit about the boy I haven't shared, but I've been meaning to...He plays Chess...He's 5 and he plays Chess well...He saw me playing on the computer, and wanted to get in on it...After a couple weeks of realizing he couldn't beat the computer, he played my wife and beat her...He then gave me a run for my money...We got a cheap Chess set, and started playing every day...Seriously, if you don't pay attention closely, he'll beat you...He's beaten my Dad, and me...It's scary how quickly he's picked it up...Here's an example of his skills...



Okay, he's not there yet...But he's pretty damn good...And cocky...He got on the phone with my brother-in-law in Boston, and informed him that he was gonna whoop his ass!

Now, I'm gonna get into a topic they may bother some people...It has been often said, by many people, that America sucks...Well, it doesn't...But many Americans do...Example: Saturday my wife picked up a Pizza from our local Giant Eagle Grocery store...It looked great on top...But then, as I picked it up, I noticed the dough on the bottom was basically raw...What the F**k!

This is a problem in this country...The "Average American" is who we go to for most of our goods and services...Sadly, the "Average American" is a lazy f**k, that sucks at their job! If you make pizza for a living, make it right! If you fix brakes on cars, like my wife's, they shouldn't be making a God awful grinding sound 6 months later...Yeah, I'm talking to you NTB! If you're waiting on a tables for a living, don't spill my coffee!



Okay, that may be an extreme reaction, but it's such an over-the-top ad, it cracks me up!

Now, before I go, I said something at the top about moaning...Well folks, audio has been found of the conception of the latest member of the Beeze family...I thought I'd release it before the media jumps all over it...



Now get back to work before your boss catches you checking out porn!

Later, The Beeze.

Legs & "Side P*s$y"

This post is a simple one...The title says it all...LEGS...There's something so wonderful about legs...Strong and firm, but yet, so very soft...(Unless you're dealing with some unf*ckable creature that doesn't shave her legs)

YUCK!

There's nothing like starting at her feet and slowly working your way up to that sweet, sweet, lunch pail...Legs are the Yellow Brick Road, that lead to the promised lands...(yes, I said landS)

As Al Pacino said in "Scent of a Woman"...

"Women! What can you say? Who made 'em? God must have been a f*ckin' genius."

Now the second part of this post...

-

Sound designer Troy Quan from Sirius XM put this together recently...A song called "Side P*ssy" ...He used clips from comedian Patrice O'Neal...Patrice has some strong and funny opinions on women, relationships, and sex...You may not laugh, but I sure as hell did!

Have a good weekend...

Later, The Beeze.

I Should Be in Boston

I've felt this way for awhile now...But after last night, I know it's true...I should be in Boston! In case you missed Monday Moaning , yes, I'm rooting for the Celtics...

Last night was great at the Beeze House...First I watched The Bruins beat the Flyers and take a 2-0 lead in the series...Anytime the Flyers lose, it's a good thing! Then the Wife and I had some good ole fashioned pregnant sex...Don't have to worry about where I blast for 8 months!

After that we enjoyed watching the Celtics beat up on LeBron, his stupid elbow, and the rest of the Cavs...

So far 2 wins for the town I hope to live in one day, soon. Then I popped on the end of the Red Sox game...Shocked, and excited I was...As the Sox put up 17 runs...Holy $h!t they started hitting!

Some of you may wonder about a Clevelander being such a Boston fan...1st, I blame my wife...She's originally from Boston, so the first time we went there, we had been married for a few months...I would be meeting her sitsers and their families for the first time...They were all great to me, and treated me like they had known me for years...Then my brother-in-law started his Boston Sales pitch...Showing every bit of greatness the City had to offer...Hell this was before the Sox had broken the curse...When you compare cities...Boston vs. Cleveland...the Cleve doesn't stand a chance...



2nd, I've grown tired of the poorly run sports franchises in Cleveland...You can try any excuse you want...I know them all, I've used them myself...But these teams have been mismanaged for years...Yes, the Cavaliers have turned it around, but that never would have happened if LeBron James hadn't fallen in their lap...

Don't worry, when it comes to hockey, The New York Rangers are still my team...But once they were no longer in it, I jumped o with the Bruins for the playoff run...It would be morally bankrupt to root for Pittsburgh!

Oh, I'm sure this happens every where, but I've noticed it a lot lately...Can you stop saying "WE" when talking about your city's sports team...I must have heard 5 people today, while talking about the Cavs losing to the Celtics, and having to hear my taunts, say, "We played awful lst night." Really? What f**king position were playing last night dummy? Oh, you weren't...Then stop saying "WE"...You're a fan, you did nothing! If you're not on the team, you aren't part of the "WE".

Now, all I need is for the housing market to recover, just long enough for me to sell my house...Sadly, my wife that works for Wells Fargo says that may be a longer wait then we would like... Here's something positive to close with...

Okay, Boston haters...Have at it...

Cleveland lovers, do your worst...

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

Well, if I learned anything this weekend, it was, never bet against Calvin Borel in the Kentucky Derby...Never again! This guy has a knack for winning "the run for the roses."

The Beeze family headed into Erie, PA to see my wife's parents, and of course...Hit the track...Best thing that town did was put in slots and a horse track...Table games are coming soon! They saw Ohio approved Casinos last year and figured they better stay ahead of the curve...Don't worry PA...This damn town hasn't even broken ground on this big money maker we've been promised...City and state officials are spending too much time with their heads in their asses!

So Derby day is always fun for us...I take my children's college fund, and try to make a little extra scratch...I let them play too...Why not get them started young...The boy...The famous, little Beeze, was the only one to make any money this weekend...He put all his money an Paddy O'Prado, so he made a few bucks...Now he has another reason to bust balls!

After the race we stopped at a great little place called Sara's ...Old school in every way...It has a classic drive-in feel...Excellent burgers, and dogs...The best onion rings...Great fries...Even better shakes...And the prices are great...Especially after you blew too much money at the track!

Awhile later, we got the kids to bed, and told grandma and grandpa, "see ya later!" We headed out for snack...A little pricier than Sara's...Without a doubt the best restaurant in Erie...AltoCucina

We both got our favorite appetizer, Fontinella Cacchione...Baked Fontinella cheese in puff pastry topped with mushroom ragu...Incredible...We sat at the bar, eating, me drinking, and watching the Cavs vs. the Celtics...These people were rooting for the Cavs...Then after some chit-chat, and it came out that I was from Cleveland...The questioned my green Boston red Sox cap...I had to inform them, that until Mark Shapiro is fired, I won't be Johnny Indians fan...Then I was asked if I was rooting for the Celtics..."Yep!"

They questioned this also..."How could I not want 'The King to get a Ring'?" Okay, first, I'm really sick of this f**king slogan...People in Cleveland and God knows where else, all acting like LeBron James has suffered through a 15 year career with no shot at a title...Bitch please, grow the hell up!

Second, there is only one king! Elvis...Costello!



F**k Elvis Presley! That no good, hillbilly, lump of shit...All he did was take other people's songs and shake his ass...

Third, I'm a hockey, fan and could really care less about basketball...But I bet on the Celtics, just to piss off some co-workers!

Fourth, I'm sick of the LeBron love fest! Everyone wants to tel you what a great young, man he is...Let me give you a couple tidbits you may not know...He's a shitty tipper...When you work in the restaurant biz, that's a big deal...Rich douches that tip for shit, can go eat a dick!

Now let me ask you this...How many kids does Lebron have? The media would like you to believe 2...they don't talk about the other one...Who's mother was paid off, and told to shut and and go away..."The King" isn't so squeaky clean people...And he isn't "The King."

LBJ, you want to be the king? Meet me on the ice!

Speaking of Ice...The NHL Playoffs continue to not disappoint...In the West, San Jose has taken a 2-0 series lead over the Red Wings...Could the Sharks actually be putting it all together? Vancouver is is up 1-0 on Chicago...Both teams have good firepower, but the Canucks have the advantage between the pipes...

In the East, Montreal and Pittsburgh are tied at 1 game each...This one looks like it may go seven games...Saturday the Boston Bruins took a 1-0 lead on the Philadelphia Flyers after a game winning, overtime goal by Marc Savard...That's the way to come back from a serious head injury!

Last, the wife and I are taking suggestions in the name department...I'm sure it will be easier once we find out if it's a boy or girl...Right now, on top of the boys list is, Finn...On top of the girls list is, Anna...Let us know what you think.




Nothing like pounding away while she snacks, and people talk shit to ya!

Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.