Showing posts with label Louis CK. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Louis CK. Show all posts

Monday, June 29, 2020

America, Stop Listening to Joe Rogan




That's the look on Joe's face when he's falling into a trance from his latest guest....

-I'll start by saying, I like Joe Rogan's standup comedy...And I did like his podcast for awhile...Rogan always put a variety of people on with a wide range of topics getting covered on the podcast...He loved going down conspiracy theory rabbit holes, and bought into many...But then will bash certain people for buying into certain conspiracy theories...But as he does this, in the back of your mind you have to remember, he has repeatedly defended Alex Jones...The leader in pumping out conspiracy theories...Jones who screamed that the Sandy Hook massacre was a hoax, and his minions then taunted families of the victims...The victims being 6-7 year old children...While Rogan has repeatedly tried to say he didn't believe this and Jones shouldn't have said it, he still defended Jones and would say, "But look at all the stuff he was right about."



We're still looking and haven't found anything Joe!

-Joe Rogan has also defended Roseanne Barr for her racist, Trump-like tweets...Before she was even on his podcast Rogan was doing damage control for her on nearly every episode, saying "She's been working hard on her show, not sleeping well, on Ambien and drinking".....When she did the podcast he continued to give his full-throated support...

Not surprisingly, he has a soft spot for fellow comics...Yes, he defended Louis CK...He'll say what CK did was gross and inappropriate, but will hammer home how "Louis asked the women first," before he pulled his dick out and jacked off in front of them...He tries to ignore the story of CK jerking off while on the phone with a female comic...

Recently Comedian Chris D'Elia was outed for being a creep and trying to bang and groom underage girls...He's been on Rogan's podcast a number of times, and many shitty comedians who are in Rogan's circle, Brendan Schaub, Bryan Callen, Andrew Santino, Theo Vonn, have all made comments saying they didn't know anything like this was going on with D'Elia and they "hope he gets the help he needs"...Never mind the young ladies...The problem is, this fucking idiots, like Trump, don't seem to realize there is a permanent record of the shit they say...Because they all record podcasts and there are clips of all of them joking about D'Elia fucking young girls...So far Rogan has been quiet about it...I expect him to wait until it dies down and then he'll be defending his pals right to do standup and acting again, and he'll attack the "cancel culture" because people being pissed at a guy for creeping on young girls are far worse then the creep in his eyes...

-Joe Rogan has always prided himself on being in the middle Politically...You can see it in his comedy...There are things that lean left, and there are things that lean right, and to be fair, comedy is comedy and you go where the joke is...But on the podcast he often let both sides on issues get heard....And I felt his "I'm in the middle" thing was legit when he had put Tulsi Gabbard on the show multiple times, and vocally supported her...Of everyone that was in the massive field she was hands down, the most centrist...

But it seemed like there was switch...Rogan made a very strong stand against the Trump administration policy of taking illegal immigrant children away from their parents and sticking them in cages...There are a couple of powerful clips from his podcast on and it's great...But really, let's be honest...That topic seems to be an easy one to take a stand on and not get much backlash on...Anyone giving you shit about that one is an asshole...

Then, as it was clear that Tulsi Gabbard didn't have a shot, Rogan started talking about liking things Bernie Sanders was saying...Liberals, myself included loved this...You can't get much lefty then Sanders...Then he had Sanders on the Podcast and he ate it up....And then on a podcast after Sanders was on, Rogan said he'll "Probably vote for Bernie"...

The Right was pissed and went nuts and attacked...And the Anti-Sanders left went nuts and attacked....What did Rogan do...He hid in the corner...Mr. Tough Guy whined about the backlash he was getting...He had finally taken a political stance and didn't like that idiotic and misogynists things he had said were being dug up...He didn't like jokes were being picked apart...Honestly, I hate when people try to attack comedians over jokes, I think it's ridiculous...But instead of standing up like he did for Roseanne Barr, Louis CK and Alex Jones, he sulked...Then ran right and said he'd "rather vote for Trump over Biden"....

-How far right has Joe Rogan run? Well folks he is the leader in promoting anit- ANTIFA bullshit...Not Donald Trump, but Joe Rogan...I know that's shocking, but Rogan is in the lead because he's been spewing his bullshit against ANTIFA for a couple more years then Trump, thanks to his good buddy Alex Jones...What all three of these fucking idiots (and many others) don't get, is ANTIFA means Anti-Fascism...Here's the definition....Antifa is an anti-fascist political movement in the United States comprising a diverse array of autonomous groups....

So if I'm Anti-Fascist and you oppose Anti-Fascists, that makes you Pro-Fascist...You remember the most popular Fascists the world ever saw...Those would be the Nazi's...Joe, Alex, Donny, you guys are all fucking idiots!

The biggest problem with Joe Rogan is, he falls under a trance with any guests he perceives to be smarter than him...When it's idiot comics like Schaub, Callen and Vonn, he knows he's the smart one in the room, plus he's higher on the comedy food chain...He commands the room and speaks with authority...When it's a doctor, scientist, an author, a reporter, he lets them say what they want, and absorbs it, trying to grab onto a talking point he can use to make himself look smarter later down the road...

The worst cases are when he fan-boys out, like he does with Elon Musk...Recently, Musk, always try to make more money as he promises the world, but rarely delivers, and a Trump lover, was on Rogan's podcast stating his case on why his facilities should be allowed to reopen during the COVID pandemic...Musk informed the world that people, doctors, scientists weren't reading the numbers right...Only he reads them right and it's not that bad...This gave Rogan the firepower to play the percentage game...

Rogan and Musk and too many others like to give the percentage of COVID cases and deaths compared to the the population...It's easy to make it not sound as bad that way...But the facts are, globally there are now over 10 million cases...Over 500,000 deaths and of those deaths, the United States alone are about to hit 130,000...And the cases are surging, because of people like Rogan who have a huge microphone...It's shocking and sad because early on in this COVID mess Rogan took it seriously and repeatedly talked about his friend, comic, Michael Yo who had a very serious case of COVID...But as it often happens, Rogan's view changes when a guest shows up with a different take...Especially if it's his buddy Elon...So Musk spews his bullshit, Rogan eats it up and starts saying COVID isn't that bad and you don't need to wear masks...He has even, said people wearing masks are "bitches"...

Exactly what we should have expected from the true meathead he is, deep down inside...130,000 dead Americans and the numbers are growing every day, because you're afraid to look like a "bitch"....

Here's a clip, a rare time a guest calls Rogan out on his nonsense...Bill Burr tries to shut Rogan's bullshit down...Now they're friends and Burr went easier then I think he would have on a regular idiot, but you hear Rogan saying people wearing masks are bitches and Burr smacks him for it...It's one of the few times Rogan can't Alpha Male another comic...




-Rogan's podcast is a monster...He had a doctor on who said "take Vitamin D," it will help you beat COVID...Rogan repeated it...In two days Vitamin D was sold out everywhere...And hey, Vitamin D is good for you...But for all the times he promotes Vitamin D or says we shouldn't take kids away from their families and lock them in cages, there are for more moments of misinformation...Lies and cluelessness about ANTIFA, Elon Musk's skewed numbers, defenses of Alex Jones, masks are for bitches...He does as much harm than good...

And now he has signed a multi-year deal for his podcast to be exclusively on Spotify...It is rumored to be a $100 million deal...So as much as fans want to make him out to be a maverick and not part of the establishment, he's just like John McCain...He's no maverick, he is the establishment...They guy made his early big bucks hosting Fear Factor...Now he's to Spotify, what Howard Stern was/is to Sirius Satellite Radio...The Spotify deal solidified my growing unhappiness with Rogan...

Spotify is an evil corporation...They built the company on streaming music and now have moved hard into the Podcast game...I have never had a Spotify account and refuse to do so...Why? They made their name and money streaming music, but they don't pay the artists...Spotify does not pay the musicians/writers/artist...They pay the labels...Which is you know anything about the music business, they religiously fuck over the artist...Many artists have tried to fight against this system...They keep running into a brick wall...Rogan's wasn't the first podcast that I have walked away from because of an exclusive deal with Spotify...I'm sure it won't be the last...

At one time, Joe Rogan was good for us...He was great for the Podcast industry...Now, he's become a buffoon...He has started playing down to the lowest common denominator...And at this time, in this country that is the last thing we need.


Sunday, May 17, 2015

Monday Moaning



There are a few things I have to write about this week...A couple we will discuss here, and another will be given it's own post...The first thing I am going to touch on is comedian Louis CK and his appearance Saturday on Saturday Night Live...Twitter was exploding Saturday during the broadcast, and Sunday morning the Internet was covered with columns, and blogs, and blurbs about how offensive Louis CK's monologue was...It appears Louis wasn't afraid to poke fun at three hot-button issues, as well as himself....Racism, the Middle East (Israel included) and Child Molesters...Here's the clip if you want to watch...




I have two problems with those getting upset about Louis CK's jokes...

1. He's a comedian telling jokes...You may not laugh at the same things as everyone or anyone...Just as we all don't like the same movies, music, politics, food, you name it...Everyone has their own tastes...It's comedy, not Maw and Order where every fucking episode is the same!

2. It's SNL...This use to be the place that did ground breaking comedy...The place where the envelope was pushed...Where it made you laugh, cringe, and think...I was happy to see them pushing again, because to be honest, with the exception of a skit here and there, the show has sucked for a number of years...

The Child Molestation shit really got people touchy...(pun intended)...Maybe you twats should go back through the archives and look up SNL in the early years, when they had a character named "Uncle Roy"...He was a babysitting pervert, who not only did creepy shit with young girls, but in the end, he won...He didn't get busted...Finding video is hard because SNL has gotten so soft...But here is a clip of the Opie and Jimmy show...Early in the show they are talking about SNL, and then some characters Jimmy does, which lead to discussion of "Uncle Roy...At 14 minutes and 20 seconds they play the sketch and give you play-by-play...It was a whole lot worse then what Louis CK said...





Uncle Roy is a fucking creep...But no matter how cringing something is, I'm not going to complain about it being on TV or radio, or whatever...I believe in freedom of speech, even speech I don't agree with...I also believe in something just as powerful...

The remote control! You don't like it, turn it the fuck off cunts!

And one last thing to all those bitching and tweeting about what a monster Louis CK is...Guess what, you're talking and writing about him...He won!

- Next, the stupid Patriots underinflated balls story kept getting air-time all week...And looking at it all closely, I have to say, When the fuck is Robert Kraft going to sue the NFL?  Their idiot report clears the Patriots organization of wrongdoing, yet Goodell fined the team a million dollars, and ripped them of two draft picks...Doesn't really make sense...And the main reason they say Brady is guilty is because he didn't give them his phone for them to look at texts...A phone they had no legal ground to ask for....I do remember another investigation (with no legal standing) that asked Roger Goodell to give his phone and he refused....So why the fuck is this guy still the commissioner!?!

If Brady just would have punched a women, beat a kid, raped a girl, and covered up a murder, he'd be fine....

Fuck them all...I'm done with this topic now, and I'm done with the fucking asshole NFL!

- Okay, on a much more important topic...Sunday Cleveland had it's annual Marathon...Yes, we have a marathon...As long as I've been a live...It doesn't get the hype or the fanfare of some of the other marathons...We're a smaller city, and we aren't always mugging for the camera....Don't give me your shit New York and Boston, we all know you love the spotlight, and you know you're a little fucking annoying sometimes...

Honestly I don't really pay attention to any marathon...they're kind of boring to watch...But a friend of mine Brendan Goers was working down there and snapped a pic and posted it on facebook...


Yep, those are Firefighters running in full gear...26.2 miles...a high of 82 degrees with 64% humidity...I was blown away by how, as my friend described them, "Badass" these guys are...I had to dig into it a bit...


They had the full gear, including the 40 pound pack on their backs...The only exception they made was running shoes...Why did they do this? to raise awareness and money for ALS...One of these guys dad has the awful disease...The Parma Heights Firefighters raised over $15,000 for ALS...That's fucking awesome!

Screw your ice water challenge...Run a marathon in full firefighter gear....That's a fucking challenge...I shit on things in Cleveland area often...But I was proud as hell Sunday seeing this.

That's it for now...But more to come this week...

Have a week.


Monday, May 9, 2011

Ignorance Was Bliss (part 4: The N-word)

Let me start by saying, the term, "The N-Word" is stupid...I will be using the words nigger, and nigga in this post...If you can't handle that, get out...People say using "the N-word" takes the power/sting out of the word...That's bullshit!

Now, today I chaperoned my son's class trip to the Cleveland Metro-parks Zoo...Monday the Zoo is free with your ID showing you live in the county...So we knew going in that it would be crowded...We got there right at opening so we had an early start before it got busy...After lunch the crowd picked up...Us chaperones had to be on our toes...

At one point a group black men pushed through our group of kids while chatting with each other...Every other word out of their mouths was nigger or nigga...Some say there is a difference...I say they're full of shit...So first off, fuck you for pushing through a group of 5 and 6 year olds, you fucking assholes...Second, fuck you for spitting out the word nigger, rapid fire, like a fucking machine gun...

At this moment I'm in a no win situation...If I stop them and ask them to watch it with that word around the kids, I'm willing to bet they get pissed at me, for being offended by them using a word that would offend them if I used it...

If one of these kids stops and asks me what is a nigger, I'm willing to bet these black men get pissed off about a kid under my supervision using that word...A word they just heard come out of his mouth...(our group was mixed with white, blacks, Hispanics and Arabs, but mostly white)

I'm also willing to bet, that no matter how I answer that question, this group of men will not be happy with what I say...(before you accuse me of being racist, fuck you...I've seen shit like this happen before...I have known, work, and like plenty of black people...And to be honest, I hate plenty of people from any and every race...I'm a dick like that...)

So I kept my eyes on the kids, and rounded them up...and we went on our way...And then to make things worse, one of the other chaperones leaned towards me and said, "fuckin' niggers"...And all I was thinking was, 'okay white trash.'

What am I getting at...I'm sick of the n-word debate...People say that the over-use of nigga/nigger in rap music, and Tarantino movies have taken the power out of the word...They're all fucking liars...Because if those black guys would have heard that white trash guy say "fuckin' niggers" they would have beaten the living shit out of him in front of a bunch of little kids...

Here, you want to take the sting and power out of the word, first lead...Lead by not saying it all the time...Stop using it the same way I use fuck...Second, ignore it when a backwards-ass dolt says it...I know these sound like shocking ideas...Shocking ideas that have been suggested by people wiser than I...But what the fuck did Martin Luther King know?

I know this may be an uncomfortable topic, so let's get a awkward laugh in here before I go...




Later, The Beeze.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Monday Moaning (things I love)


Well, as I write this, my wife and daughter are watching The Oscars, and I figured I'd come down to the man-cave/playroom and knock out my blog...The only reason in my opinion to tune into the Oscars would be to look at Anne Hathaway...By why do that when I can just pull up the hot and dirty parts of her career online!?!



So a couple weeks for Valentine's Day, instead of being lovey-dovey, I filled my post with hate...You know, shit that pisses me off...There may have been some people who didn't like that sentiment...Now anyone who reads my blog regularly should know what to expect, but some people are just silly sometimes...

So this week's post is going to be a bunch of things I love...Besides Myself and my family, cause I guess I made that clear already! And since I couldn't tell you what's going on in the world of sports other than the shit you already know, why not just do a nice fluff piece...Oh, and Rex Ryan, can you stop making stupid statements about winning the "Super Bowl" every off-season...Go suck a toe fatty!


Okay, first I clearly love Anne Hathaway, and other such sexy woman, like ROSIE_JONES!

I love Hockey...Playing it, watching it...I'll watch any level...It's the greatest sport out there...

I love blogging...I love getting my true thoughts and feeling out there...even if those thoughts and feelings are filled with hate at times...At least it's honest!

I love great comedians like Bill Burr, Patrice O'Neal, Jim Norton, the late, great George Carlin, and Louis CK...All are funny, and smart...This past week, on the O & A show Louis CK not only asked Donald Rumsfeld if he was a flesh eating lizard...But before that he made some amazing points about Corporate America...Yes, it's a long clip that has two others that follow it, but if you have time, take a listen....






I love my XM Satellite Radio...Not just for Opie and Anthony...I not hearing the same shitty play lists that every shitty radio station beat into your head...


I love Notre Dame...Not just the sports...The whole damn campus...I love it in the Fall...


And I love it in the Winter...



The Spring is nice too!

I love Macho Salad...




I love the word fuck...It's the best word going...Really, there's nothing you can't do with it...






I also love to fuck!

I love music...All kinds of music...I love Jazz...Real jazz...None of that Kenny G shit...I'm talking John Coltrane and Thelonious Monk Jazz...




Yes, and anyone who reads me knows, I love Our Lady Peace...



And I love it when they take a song by some one else, that I don't like, and make me like it...




I love Great Lakes Beers...Conway's Irish Ale was my friend Saturday night!

I Love Irish Car Bombs!

I love porn! Find that on your own creeps!

I love Twitter...I get so much news and bullshit from people's link on there it's great...It makes things even easier for our lazy ass society...

I love technology, but is shit like this going to kill off people playing real musical instruments one day?




I and my son, we love Drinking out of Cups...



I'm sure I could go on for days, but I want to have a drink, watch some porn, and keep watching NORM_MACDONALD'S twitter feed, as he trashes The Oscars!


Have a week...

Later, The Beeze.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Monday Moaning


I don't know how you feel, but Katy Perry's pictures in "Rolling Stone" may be my highlight of the week! I mean, I took two weeks of vacation, then worked a double on Saturday, and worked Sunday...So after vacation, Katy Perry's deliciousness has to be the next best thing!

In case you missed my first post back from vacation,
here_it_is...Then there was Volume_2...Volume 3 will be coming tomorrow...Lots of good stuff in thoughs about the Little Beeze...

In the Sports world, which I haven't paid much attention to in the last few weeks, the NFL Football Hall of Fame inducted one hell of a class this weekend...
Russ Grimm ...Rickey Jackson... Dick LeBeau...Floyd Little...John Randle...Jerry Rice...Emmitt Smith...Seriously, that is some serious talent...That said, I have to wonder, is the honor of being inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame watered down...These guys were all great players, but look at the Baseball Hall of Fame...They're real pricks about letting guys in...Guys who have the numbers, but they make them wait...Just ask Bert Blyleven!

In the world of Golf, Tiger Woods has completely fallen apart...It didn't watch any of it this weekend, but I've seen and heard the updates...Dude has lost it...I've got a bit of advice for Tiger and the PGA...Get some strange for that man...When he was banging every skank that walked by, he was killing it...The PGA needs to set him up in a hotel with 5-10 of these gashes for a week or so...I'm sure he'll get his swing back then!

In Hockey news, after much talk about it happening, the deal is done...Mike Modano,40years old, signed a one-year deal with the Detroit Red Wings worth $1.25 million, with a possibility of earning $500,000 more through performance based bonuses...The Wings always seem to manage to get one more year out of guys, and I think they'll do it again with Modano...Even at 40, that's a pretty good third line center...

LeBron James returned to Akron for the first time since he made his "Decision" to "take his talents to South Beach" this weekend for his charity bike-athon...It seems that finally, one of his handlers got in his ear and told him to say something nice to the fans in Cleveland..."The King" finally thanks his fans in Cleveland and North East Ohio...Based on the mood here, it may be too little, too late...



I'm glad the guy does some good charity work for kids, but he's still a tool!

Time for the Tweets of the week...

First two from
Shoosh0126
"Didn't have the $$ for UFC pay per view tonight, so I spent the evening in a fistfight with my cock. Poor lil' feller didn't have a chance."

Shoosh0126
"I'm excited!! I think there's a cute & single girl moving in next door. At least that's what I gather from the Dora the Explorer Big Wheel."

Okay, that was a little wrong, but still funny...

Now from one of my favorites,
sarkastickunt
"Once you have kids you get to have lots of surprise sex and by that I mean if you actually get any it would be a complete surprise. "

Lastly,
adamcarolla
"Sad realization you know your an asshole if every time your wife hands you the phone she puts her palm over the receiver and says 'be nice'"

I know exactly what he's talking about!

Now many of you know, I'm a big Notre Dame fan...(Get the booing out of your system) I had been thinking about writing a blog about certain Fighting Irish Football players who need to step up big time this year...Sadly, the guys at
uhnd.com beat me to it, and they were spot on.

I know this isn't my typical, long-winded, ranting and raving, Monday post...I guess the vacation did some good, but I do see some rage coming down the road...That said, I'll close with some
Louis_CK...Seriously, click the link, (they won't let me embed it) he takes this bitch apart...It's great!

That's it for now...

Later, The Beeze.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Monday Moaning




As I said on facebook and twitter....

THANK YOU GHANA! Now maybe we have to hear about Soccer anymore! My God am I sick of these suddenly soccer fans out there... Other then that Donovan guy...Name me the U.S. starting 11...You probably didn't even realize it was 11 guys out there...Why don't you tell me again, "There great athletes!" Are they douche bag!?! 'Cause I don't think we'd be seeing any of them playing Football, Hockey, Basketball, or Baseball...But I bet Bo Jackson could have played some f**king soccer...They aren't great athletes...They're great joggers...That's what they do...They jog around the field for 2 hours, with an occasional burst of steam, for a brief scoring chance, that fails...Game over, you wasted 2 hours!

As you can see, I don't like Soccer, and I give ESPN some of the blame...They've made me think about Soccer, the same way I would think about a dick...I don't like it, and I don't want it forced down my throat!

Hell we should just throw in the tweet of the week right here...

JimNorton "While I am bummed we won't win the world cup, at least Americans can go back to hating soccer for the boring sport it is."

Here's another one from Jim Norton, poking fun at himself...

JimNorton "Speaking of unfuckable disasters; a screen cap of me from Red Eye on Fox.
http://moby.to/7kmo5b "


Moving on...I've been critical of Baseball, and Cleveland over the past year, or two...Well why stop now?

First I want to touch on the Indians...I've been going through the moves GM mark Shapiro has made...He's moving into the President position, and one of the tools below him, has by hand picked to fill the GM role...So things aren't going to get better anytime soon...Here are some of the moves...And hey, I found a couple good ones...Let's start there...They traded Casey Blake for Catcher Carlos Santana...He's an average catcher, with a hell of a switch-hitting bat...Sounds just like Victor Martinez...Santana is part of the reason they felt they could move Martinez for some young pitching...Sadly the young pitching the Indians got for Martinez was Justin Masterson, who is below average in every sense of the word...My tee-ball team fields better then this dope...He's an awesome 3-14, with an ERA of just under 5.00 since joining the Tribe!

Then there was Cliff Lee to Philly for 2 pitchers who have struggled in the minors...One has now had 2 arm surgeries...Lou Marson, who is an awful catcher, and can't hit his weight...And average, infielder, Jason Donald, who ruined a perfect game by being called safe when he was clearly out! The biggest problems with these two trades were...They were bad trades...You got shit! And, both Lee and Martinez still had another year on their contracts...They didn't need to rush on these deals...Even though Shapiro had what teams wanted, and was in the drivers seat, he let them push him around...He's an ass! Oh, and don't forget C.C.Sabathia for 3 average minor leaguers!

And people wonder why I've given up hope in this team...Sit down and watch an entire Indians game...It physically hurts...That's how bad they are...

Also in Cleveland...There are so many people just dying for July 1st...They can't wait for free agency in the NBA...These dolts all think LeBron James, and every other free agent are going to sign on that very day...WAKE UP DUMMIES! Not gonna happen...He's making you f**kers wait...And yes, many people feel LeBron is going to stay in the Cleve...I honestly have no idea how people can live in this town, and still think positively...Good luck with that!

Since I'm just beating on Cleveland, let's talk about my trip to the grocery store Sunday...I do most of the shopping...Why not, I gotta cook the shit...She'll just burn it...So I'm there, and I start noticing fat people...Believe me, I've got plenty of extra pounds on me right now, but these people were seriously fat f**kers...The first one I really noticed was this old broad in a wheel chair...She was in it because she was so f**king fat, she couldn't walk...What was she doing...Stuffing her face with about 20 free samples that were sitting outside the deli...Next up for fatty was the bakery...

The last fatty I saw was in one of those motorized carts, and you could just smell the diabetes coming of this guy...Then you look in his cart...I shit you not people...16 six-packs of 20 oz. Pepsi Bottles, a pack of hot dogs, a pound of Ham, and pack of American cheese...Way to fast-track death Chubs!

Now, we come to the point where I talk about my son...The Little Beeze...First, Tee-Ball...The Seawolves are doing well...By my standards we won our first two games...Since they don't keep score, and the whole lineup bats, no matter how many outs are made, and all the other silly rules, I go by how many outs are recorded...In the first game we recorded 4 outs, the other team 1...The second game we recorded 4 again, and they got 2...So in my book, we're 2-0!

Second part about the boy...He can wipe his own ass...BUT...We don't always trust him, so sometimes we check...Sunday he was going a lot...So I told him to call me when he was done, and I'd wipe him, just to make sure he wasn't leaving anything in there...Or on the floor...Or God knows where...So I'm wiping his ass, and he says, "Use a wet one!" (meaning baby wipes) It was a bit messy, so it made sense...Then as I'm wiping his ass, he says, "That feels so good! So good!" So now we know why he was in there so much...The boy is a freak...He must have heard us that time the wife finger popped me in the ass! (Not in a gay way guys!...Not that there's anything wrong with that!)

Now with that, I leave you with an ad for Louis CK's new show that starts Tuesday on FX, right after "Rescue Me"...It's gonna be good!




Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Monday Moaning (Fathers Day Edition)


So Sunday was Father's Day...A classic "holiday" they say is for us, but really, it's all about them...When I say them, I'm talking about the kids...It's odd how different Mother's Day is from Father's Day...Yet so much the same...You see here at the Beeze house, on Mother's Day we let my wife sleep in...Sleeping in means sleeping past 8:00AM...9 if you're really lucky...Then we make her a nice breakfast...Then I give her the card and presents I got for her...The kids give their very specially made gifts...Then It is my job to keep them out of her hair all day...I take them out and spend some real good quality Dad time with them, letting my do whatever she wishes...

Now here's how Father's Day went...I got to sleep in...Past 10:00AM...Nice start...The wife made me breakfast...There's a reason why she never cooks besides the fact that I'm a trained professional...She stinks at it...She can burn water...The food was bad...Luckily she said it first and threw hers away...But at least she didn't f**k up the coffee! Then I got a card from the kids...It was an old Valentines Day card I gave my wife...They scratched out what I wrote, and threw their names on it...Then my wife said, "Order yourself cap from LIDS, 'cause I didn't get you anything." But the promise of sex later in the evening was offered up...Then I spent some quality Dad time with the kids...We went to see "Toy Story 3"...It was okay, but then the water works started...They really pulled the heart strings in this one, and both my kids were crying...These two are a couple of emotional nightmares!

After that we went to a Greek Festival I mentioned in
THIS_BLOG last week...The kids jumped around in one of those giant inflatable castles...I bought my daughter a bracelet she liked...And when I got in line for some delicious lamb shank, these two start complaining about being tired, and hot, and wanting to go home...I couldn't take the sound of their voices, and gave up on the grub...When we got home they fought over who was going to watch what on TV and about which of their favorite dishes I was gonna make for dinner...I can't believe I'm adding another one of these to my life...

This is how Father's Day should be...Just like the good ole days.....



Just drop and gobble ladies!


Now normally I find a way to mix some sports in to this post, but I'll be honest, I haven't paid any attention to sports this past week...Yeah, the Lakers beat the Celtics for the NBA Championship, but that's old news...Some guys were playing golf this weekend...Haven't a clue what happened...World Cup...Again, haven't a clue...I heard on the radio, that the Pirates drew almost a 100,000 fans to their weekend series with the Indians...I have to laugh...It took the Indians going to Pittsburgh to get some fans in that beautiful park...From what I heard there was a good number of Tribe fans there...Can't get them go to downtown Cleveland, but they'll go to Pittsburgh! I've been watching the Red Sox and Dodgers...Not that we have much of a choice...Can we hype Manny going back to Boston anymore? Let's get back to that lack of choice topic there...

I've brought this up before, but hell, it needs to be talked about more...Every week on the MLB Network, ESPN, and FOX, there a very select few teams that get games shown...1. The Yankees 2. The Red Sox 3. The Mets 4. The Phillies 5. The Cubs 6. The Cardinals...Sometimes the Twins, Angels and Dodgers get mixed in...If the Red Sox are playing the Yankees, the whole series gets on the air...If the Cubs and Cardinals are playing, they get a couple on...Then it comes down to who are the Yankees, Red Sox, and Mets playing...This week, the Yankees are on ESPN Monday night...The Mets are slated in on both ESPN and MLB...The Red Sox also are slated for a couple on MLB...I understand they are major markets, and that they have huge fan bases...But how the hell is baseball going to get more viewers, more people excited, and interested, if they never see their team...Now in the last couple weeks we've seen The Nationals, and whoever they were playing, only because of Strasburg...I have to say, it's nice to see some of the smaller markets on TV...These are major leaguers...There are good players on every team...

Baseball die hard fans everywhere...But I think there are fewer and fewer of those people around every year...If baseball wants to keep selling their product, with it's overpriced tickets, and apparel, they need to stop selling just a handful of teams...Sell us the whole damn league...

Now let's get to this weeks, tweets of the week...

First from a blogging friend...

nutballgazette “I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it”

I feel the same way!

Now my best tweet of the week...This was brought on by a friend asking about my weight loss challenge...

TheBeeze34 "Weight loss not going so well. Pregnancy has killed the mood for the wife, so here I sit at the PC with a bag of Oreos watching porn!"

Guess who didn't get any for Father's Day?

And if you're on twitter, and looking for some good laughs, I get a kick out of this gal...
SARKASTICKUNT


Now a Father's Day message from Louis CK...


Watch CBS News Videos Online


And now, I'll close this thing out with Bill Burr...After the Father's Day I've had, I agree with Bill...




That's it for now, have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Monday Moaning



OH NO! This is not what Patriots fans want to see...Even worse then the pictures...Boston.com is reporting that wide receiver Wes Welker tore his ACL and MCL in today's loss to the Houston Texans...Not good at all!

Other NFL news, the Cowboys handed the Eagles a whoopin'...Baltimore made it in...And it looks like Chad Ochocinco won't be doing any dancing, as the Jets are thumping the Bengals right now...And he's in the locker room...The Jets win will put them in the playoffs...

In amazing NFL news, The Browns won their 4th straight game...They started 1-12, then they started to play some hard-nosed ball and win their last 4...WTF!?! I look at Mangini and don't know if I want to high-five him, or punch him in the throat!

Now I have to be honest...I haven't watched many of the College Bowl games...To be honest, since they put TCU and Boise State against each other...I just don't really care...I think 'Bama is gonna pound on Texas...I did watch a bit of Florida's thrashing of Cincinnati...Wow did that hurt...But once they started talking about their "Tebow Cam" I just wanted to see him break every bone in his body...But that wasn't going to happen against Cincy"s piss-poor defense..."F**king "Tebow Cam." Are you kidding me? Ya know, one day some evil shit is gonna come out about that guy...Some Tiger Woods shit...And I'm gonna laugh my ass off...
Oh, and good luck in the NFL Tebow...I can't wait to see the pros take you apart...I can't wait for everyone to see that you can't make all the throws...You'll be begging for some snaps in the stupid "Wildcat" formation...Douche!

Since I'm talking college football...I had to get this in...Another ESPN dolt, showing what a total and complete C*nt she is....




New Year's Day I was all about the Winter Classic..."Old Time Hockey" at it's best...
-

Something that Gary Bettman hasn't screw up yet...Please just keep your idiotic hands off of it...It's a good thing...Don't get greedy...Leave it alone!

Moving on to the life and times of the Beeze...The boy hasn't done anything crazy...I mean he's always a little wired and shit, but he's been alright...There's snow on the ground and he can play outside in that shit all day long...Gets it from the Norwegian side of the family. (Mrs. Beeze...Funny since she's always complaining about being cold)...So we spent some time playing in the snow...He threw a snowball at me...Oh shit! It was on...He kept saying, "You can't hit me!" Oh yeah...This is no bullshit here people...I put that kid on the ground about twenty times...No head shots! but I was unleashing it on his ass...5 years of all the headaches he's given me were coming out in snowballs...And he just kept laughing and asking for more...

Cut to a couple hours later...I'm alternating ice and a heating pad on my once torn rotator cuff...And this kid is running around like a maniac completely unscathed...Unreal!

The girl...All of 8 years old, started wearing a training bra...WHAT! That was pretty much my reaction about it...My wife is telling me not to freak out...My mother is telling me not to freak out about it...Ad my father of course says the only logical thing..."Let's go to the pub for a drink."

My feeling is kids are developing too fast due to the growth hormones and God knows what else they put in the food these days...All I know is, I'm going to be gun shopping soon!

I was looking for more advice about dealing with kids...So I turned to one of my Christmas presents...Louis CK, "Chewed Up."


This next bit made me think about some of the dumb young girls that work at the Fish House...As opposed to Woman, like my wife...





I think that's a good place to end this week...

Later, The Beeze.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

How Much Would Life Suck Without You Tube

That's right...I said it...Technology has it's good points and it's bad points...I have to say that You Tube and other sites like it, are awesome...You can find almost any type of video you want...But if you're looking for porn, I suggest Pornhub, or XNXX...

I waste at least a hour a day checking out stuff on You Tube...Hell, I've watched whole movies there...So today, I thought I'd share some of that great stuff you can find...

Let's start with my favorite bartender...




This guy is awesome!






There's a sh!t load of these videos, and they all make me laugh...

Then you can get some quality Radio, and put it to some cheap animation...And have a good laugh...




Then you can always find some good stand up comedy...




Then there's the stupid people...God bless them!




Then there's this totally disgusting stuff...




Of course you can can always find some music...




Including cool moments from your favorite band last time they were in town...




I mentioned stupid people right...God I love watching people f**k themselves up....




My son thinks I should close with some Family Guy...




The little Beeze really wants to close strong with some Peanut Butter Jelly...




Later, The Beeze.