Farewell Victor...

We won't be seeing this again....Good luck Cliff...Good luck Victor...


I know that last night I said I was done with the Cleveland Indians and baseball...But I have to get a little more off my chest...

I hate this salary dumping crap the Tribe is doing, and the never-ending rebuild...I didn't like the Betancourt trade...I hated the Garko trade...I hated the Cliff Lee trade...And now today's trade made me sick...Yes, I'm a bit of a Red Sox fan...So if Victor Martinez had to go anywhere...that would be the best place I could think of...

That said...The Indians traded away the heart and soul of this team...Martinez was one of the few players on this team, that they found and developed...Most everyone else the Tribe has acquired by trading away their best players at the prime of their career...Victor did everything that was asked of him...And then some...He took on a leadership role at a younger age then most...Why? Because there was no one else to do it...He worked to improve his defense behind the plate...then he learned to play first...All the time, hitting the sh!t out of the ball...

He has always been a first class guy...And then today we saw a little more of him then we ever expected...We saw just how much he loved the organization that brought him up...We saw how much he loved the fans of Cleveland...As he took questions from the media, just after the news broke that he would be a member of the Boston Red Sox...Victor Martinez fought-back tears as he talked about how this was the toughest day he's had in his baseball career...He talked about he hoped to only play for one team in his career...This team...He spoke about how much his teammates meant to him...How the organization had done so much for him...How great the fans are, and how thankful he is for them...

I've never heard a athlete who was on a sh!tty team...Sound so upset about being traded to one of the top franchises in the sport...He truly sounded crushed by the news...He wanted to see this thing through...Not many players in today game would have reacted like this...That's why he was the heart and soul of the Cleveland Indians....Boston, you are lucky to be getting him...And I know I'm not alone when I say that Cleveland is truly saddened to be losing Victor Martinez...

To add insult to injury...Saturday night is Victor Martinez bobble head giveaway night...WTF!?!

And next week there is a Victor Martinez backpack giveaway for the kids...Unreal...

I personally will not spend another dime on The Cleveland Indians...I've had enough with the bad ownership...Go Screw Mr. Dolan....

I've had enough with GM, Mark 'Never-Ending Rebuild' Shapiro...Go Screw!

I've had enough with hack, manager, Eric Wedge and his p!ss poor coaching staff...Made up of a bunch of below average ex-catchers....Go Screw!

I've had enough of a team that keeps asking fans to be patient...Then turns around and starts rebuilding all over again...

I've had enough of the Cleveland Indians....

GO RED SOX!!!

Later, The Beeze.

Baseball Has Lost a Fan....

Baseball may not give a damn, but I'm done...I'm tapping out...My Father taught me about the game when I was young...My Mom was my Tee-Ball Coach, and we kicked ass...So many of us have so many fond memories of Baseball and are youth....

Of the sports I love...And I love Hockey the most...But Baseball was the first...And you never forget your first...But I can't do it anymore...The bad memories, and bad feelings have finally overtaken the good memories, and those special moments...I'll never forget listening to Len Barker's perfect game on the front porch with my Dad, and neighbors, and people passing bye, stopped and listened with us...

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I'll never forget watching Ryne Sandberg play, and realizing...I want to play like him...

I could go on all day about the good memories...But the more I watch, listen, and read about Baseball...The more I feel like all that was good with the game is gone...Steroids and a juiced ball may have saved Baseball when Sosa, McGwire, and Brady Anderson were hitting everything out of the park...But then when Barry Bonds was hopped up on the 'roids, everyone got up on their high horse...Then people wanted to clean up the sport...Too little, too late douche bags...

Then, asshole, Rafael Palmeiro waves his finger and denies ever using any P E Ds...A couple months later...Positive test for Palmeiro...And there has been a slow, steady, trickle of names of players who have tested positive...

Big Sloppi David Ortiz got outed today...Another guy who has denied it in the past, and sat on his high horse...Screw you Ortiz...Go find you buddy Man Ram and compare who's balls have gotten smaller....

Then there is the business side of Baseball...The game desperately needs a salary cap...The the Palyers Union is stronger then the Teamsters ever were...And they'll fight it until the end...This has smaller market teams like the Pittsburgh Pirates constantly trading off their best players, because they can't afford to keep them around...

The bad economy hasn't helped the smaller market teams either...But this week, my hometown team...The Cleveland Indians not only admitted defeat on this season...Which , they were done a couple months ago...But they also gave up on next season...

For the second year in a row, they traded a Cy Young Award winning pitcher...Cliff Lee was sent to the Phillies yesterday for 4 minor league prospects...Mark Shapiro loves his prospects...Funny thing is...He never drafts "top prospects"...He has to keep trading the teams best players to get "top prospects"....One of these stellar prospects from the Phillies is a 18 year old single-A flame throwing pitcher...Who by the way is on the Disabled List with a sore arm...Nice move douche...I'm willing to bet he doesn't step on a Major League field...

Then there is the "slick fielding" Shortstop Shapiro had to have...He's coming off of a knee surgery...

The Indians did get a highly rated catcher...Which is good, because Kelly Shoppach sucks ass, and the buzz going around town, and everywhere else is...That teh Tribe will be trading Victor Martinez next...One of the best hitters in the game, with another year left on his contract...'But let's dump that salary and get some more prospect, because we'd rather continuesly rebuild, instead of actually competing.'

Good luck selling tickets assholes...You're gonna dump all these salaries and still lose money...Why? Because people aren't gonna support a shitty team...And they really aren't gonna come out to watch crap when they're struggling to pay their bills...I'm willing to bet that this franchise will be up for sale within five years....

Hey Shapiro...Do me a favor...While your trading all your best palyers away...Why don't you trade that overrated douche Grady Sizemore...Then I want have to see those stupid twats with their "Grady's Ladies" shirts anymore...

I gave up on the Indians when they traded Ryan Garko...Now the more that I look at things...I'm done with Major League Baseball...

With everything that's gone on...This is the only baseball player I want to see for awhile...

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Later, The Beeze.

Goodbye Garko

The Cleveland Indians traded 1st baseman Ryan Garko tonight...He was dealt to the The Giants for single-A left-handed pitcher Scott Barnes...The never-ending rebuilding process continues...

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Now the Tribe is going to bring Andy Marte up...The often traded...Often sent down to the minors...Often cleared waivers, can't miss prospect, who has done nothing but miss...But now he's finally putting it together in Triple-A this year...So lets move the guy that lead the team in RBI the last two seasons....

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That's right, Garko lead the Indians in RBI the last two seasons...Pretty surprising since it seems manager Eric Wedge is always looking for a reason not to play him...

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Garko was drafted as a catcher...But the brass felt solid with Victor Martinez about to take that role...They had Garko learn third base in the minors....Then first base...And while his bat got him on the big-league roster...He continued to work on his defense, becoming a solid 1st baseman...Then this year they said 'Go learn the outfield, so we can get you more time.' Which was just stupid...But stupid seems to be a serious problem in the Indians organization....

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The Tribe has talent...Yet they keep rebuilding...What needs to be rebuilt is the front office, and the coaching staff...

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I hope Garko does well, and I hope the Indians regret trading him away...

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I'm done with the Tribe...At least until they get rid of Shapiro and Wedge....

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Good Luck Garko!

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Later, the Beeze

Monday Moaning

It's been some time since I posted those words...Well at least it feels that way...The vacation to Boston was great...It always is...And it's always hard to leave...I've posted a couple chapters on the trip, and I'll be posting the third tomorrow...But now we have to get back in the moaning back on track...

I'm gonna start with The Baseball Hall of Fame...Congratulations to Jim Rice (it's taken too long for him to get his just due) and to Rickey Henderson...Rickey always seemed like an asshole, maybe that's why I liked him, and he was a no-brainer to get in...

That said...F**k the Hall of Fame! I said it...I don't care if you don't like it...I'll continue to say that until Bert Blyleven and Ron Santo get in...And ya know what...Pete Rose is a douche...But he should be in there too...

How the hell can you not have this guy in there? Look at Blyleven's stats and explain to me why he isn't in....http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/b/blylebe01.shtml


Now here's Santo's stats...
http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/santoro01.shtml?redir
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Yeah, I've always been a bit of a Cubs fan, but that doesn't matter...During his career, Santo was compared to Brooks Robinson, who is in the Hall of Fame, and rightfully so...Compare the numbers...http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/r/robinbr01.shtml

That's what the baseball purists love so much, and always bring up when it comes to the Hall...

And since I'm ranting about baseball...Things haven't changed here in Cleveland...The Indians still suck...Now there are rumbling that the Tribe may trade Ryan Garko...Garko has always seemed to not fit in with dummy manager Eric Edge's brilliant plan...Even though he lead the team in RBI that past two seasons...Here's GM mark Shapiro's thought process...'He's good. Trade him!' Sorry Pirates fans...Shapiro trained your dolt of a GM Neil Huntington...

Red Sox fans are happy...Julio Lugo is gone...What a hack he is...

Everyone wants Roy Halladay...But who's gonna pay the hefty price? There's a lot of talk about him going to Philly...I'm going to say he's gonna end up with the Angels...Hey if I'm gonna make predictions, why the hell should i make them predictable?

While I was away, footage of sultry ESPN vixen Erin Andrews, NAKED, were posted on the Internet...I'm pissed I missed that...I tried a link I got from Tosh.0, which is f**king hilarious...But a virus tried to f**k with me...My shit caught it...Beat it down...There's no doubt in m y mind that it was some horny dude she works with, who just wanted to know if she looks as good naked as she does with clothes on...
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Yeah, I'd do her!
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What else...Big Ben Roethlisberger is being accused of rape...I guess he got tired of stickin' it to the Browns...But seriously, this story seems fishy...No, I'm not talking about Ben's finger...No criminal complaint filed...No police investigation...She comes out a year later with this story...I hate to sound cold...But it sounds like she may be lying b!tch...
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That said...I want you to checkout this link, because anytime somebody calls out "The World Wide Leader in Sports" for their bull$h!t...I love it!

http://www.mediaite.com/tv/espn-roethlisberger/
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Moving along...Wasn't there some bike race going on lately...What happened there...Does anyone care about any part of it, other then where Lance Armstrong finished...He finished 3rd, which is pretty damn amazing since he was retired for 4 years...
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On a very sad note...Boxer Vernon Forrest was murdered Saturday night, in what appears to be an attempted robbery...To manyForrest was simply known for be a talented fighter...But what was more important was the charity work he did...He helped to create and establish Destiny's Child, Inc. which is a number of group homes that provide housing and assistance to mentally challenged adults...
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Forrest was 38 years old.
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That's it for now...I'll be posting more on the Boston trip this week, and some other nonsense...
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Later, The Beeze.

Boston Trip (volume two)

So the day after we arrived in the great state of Massachusetts...We went into Boston...Every time we do this I am wowed...When you live in Cleveland and then go to a BIG city...A real city...It blows you away...My town is a joke for a reason, and it's made clear to me every time I roll into Boston...

This time we went to check out the USS Constitution, also known as "Old Ironsides"...For those who don't know the Constitution is the country's oldest commissioned ship... Here's a shot of it's back end...

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Then we went over to the Constitution Museum....http://www.ussconstitutionmuseum.org/ I was surprised at how much the kids enjoyed it...If your kids like climbing on stuff they'll have some fun there...

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Then we went over and checkout the USS Cassin Young...Walking around this ship, you get a greater respect for what our sailors do...When I went into the galley...WOW! I've worked in some small kitchens, but Damn! This little sweat box is designed to pump out food for the whole ship...But my God it must get hot in there...

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The sleeping quarters were pretty tight and stuffy too...It can't be easy living on ship like that...So to all the men and women in the Navy...God Bless You!

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I can't forget my thought while standing next to some of the weapons on this destroyer...They can really f**k some shit up! And this is just a destroyer...I can't imagine the fire power on a battleship...

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And While we were down there...I had to snap a shot of the TD Banknorth Garden...
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After that we headed to Quincy Market for lunch...We ate a place called Quincy's Place...They're a Ice Cream, Candy, and Sandwich place...I had a great bacon cheeseburger with fries...Then everyone started mooching around...I hit a LIDS kiosk and scored another Sox cap...This one is a blueish gray...Except for the two front panels...they're tan...It's sweet!

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Then the little Beeze and I went back into Quincy's Place...He wanted ice cream...Chocolate...I ordered a shake for myself...Which the lovely young lady behind the counter politely corrected me...What I wanted, is called "Frappe" in Boston...I apologized, having been taught that by my wife, I said..."I'm sorry, I forgot...I'm from Cleveland." That got her chatting about Trot Nixon with me, since he played a season here...Everyone loves Trot...How can ya not! (I'm sorry...That rhymed, and sounds gay!)

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Then little Beeze and I went to meet up with the rest of the group, which was my wife and daughter...My sister-in-law, brother-in-law, niece, and nephew...They were all out front, watching the "Yo-Yo guy." Dude could do some wicked yo-yo tricks!

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He said that normally his wife performs with him, but she was at home with their newborn baby...We were thinking he was full of sh!t...But then i checked out his website... http://www.yoyoshow.com/

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The kids loved it...The highlight was when he dragged my brother-in-law up to be an assistant...First he had him hold a match...Dude swung his yo-yo out there and lit the match...Then he stuck a quarter behind my b-i-l's ear, and knocked it out...It was funny...Funny, because it wasn't me!

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After that....You'll have to wait for tomorrow...I gotta go now...The wife is on me to get something productive done...

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Later, The Beeze

The A B C's of The Beeze (another facebook thing)

I've been on a bit of a vacation hangover...I'll get back to sharing details of the trip to Boston tomorrow...

But for tonight I'll post this nonsense...

You've been tagged; you are supposed to write a note with the ABC's of YOU. At the end, choose 26 people to be tagged. You have to tag me so really you just need 25 more people. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you - but not in a creepy stalker kind of way....

A - Age: 33 FOR NOW

B - Bed size: KING

C - Chore you hate: ANY AND ALL YARD WORK

D - Dog's name: NO DOG

E - Essential start your day item: EMPTY BLADDER, DRINK COFFEE, DROP A DEUCE...AND IT JUST GETS WORSE FROM THERE.

F - Favorite color(s): BLUE

G - Gold or Silver: SILVER

H - Height: 5'7"....5'9" WITH MY SKATES ON

I - Instruments you play: GUITAR

J - Job title: "I'm a thief, a liar, an angel in the fire...I'm a king, a drug, the push that comes to shove...I'm a freak, a star, I'm everything you are...I'm your Jesus, I'm your pride" Or Cook!

K - Kids- GIRL(7) BOY(4)

L - Living arrangements- WIFE, TWO KIDS, AND ME.

M - Mom's name: MOM (if we called her anything else my dad would beat our ass)

N - Nicknames: THE BEEZE...SOMETIMES HONEY...SOMETIMES ASSHOLE

O - Overnight hospital stay other than your birth: BIRTH OF MY KIDS

P - Pet Peeve: WINDOWS OPEN WHEN THE AC IS ON....PEOPLE WHO WON'T SHUT UP...(POT MEET KETTLE)

Q - Quote from a movie: FROM WAITING...(IT'S A LITTLE LONG...TOO BAD)

Monty: [Standing in bathroom stall with his bare torso exposed] I know what you're thinking now. You think we're all gay, don't you? Think we're all just a bunch of deviant lifestyle-living same-sex having motherfuckers, am I right?

Mitch: Yeah.

Monty: Well, listen. You can put that faggoty baby to bed right now. None of the guys that work here are gay.
[gets dressed]

Monty: I mean, I'll stick my finger up my ass every now and again when I'm feeling squirrely, but that's about the extent of it.

Dean: [meeting new trainee Mitch] Listen, man. You got nothing to worry about.
[pats Mitch on shoulder]

Dean: It's just a game.

Monty: Exactly.

Dean: And besides, you know, if heterosexual men can't show their cocks to each other, then what the hell are we doing here?

Monty: Amen, brother.

Dean: [tweaking Mitch's nipple] You're adorable.


R -right or left handed: RIGHT

S - Siblings: KEVIN (OLDER) PAT (OLDER)

T - Time you wake up: WHENEVER THE KIDS ATTACK ME...6:30-7:00 AM

U - Underwear: BOXER-BRIEFS

V - Vegetable you dislike: CALIFLOWER

W - Workout style: DOES SEX COUNT?

X - X-rays you've had: LEFT HAND, RIGHT HAND, MIDDLE FINGER ON LEFT HAND, RIGHT SHOULDER, LEFT SHOULDER, RIGHT ANKLE, RIGHT FOOT,HEAD, FACE, CHEST.

Y - Yesterday's best moment: UNLOADING ALL OVER FLOOR NEXT TO MY PC!

Z - Zoo favorite: I HATE THE ZOO!

Later, The Beeze.

Back So Soon!?!?

Well, I'm back...The family is too...We had a great time and spent too much money...I plan on sharing all the details in multiple posts...So here's #1...

We got in a few hours ago...The drive is a b!tch...But the way home wasn't as bad as the trip there...

Little Beeze suddenly became care sick just before we got to Buffalo...He kept looking worse and worse...So we stopped somewhere between Buffalo and Rochester...We went to a Red Roof Inn...It was full...Full on a Wednesday night, in nowhere New York! WTF!?! So then we went to a Motel 6, because they left the light on...Except for the one in our room...Seriously...The light when you first walk in and flip the switch...Not working...Nice...1/4 of a roll of toilet paper in the room...Awesome! F**k Motel 6!!!

20 minutes later little guy is feeling okay...What the hell? So we all get some sleep and we'll hit the road early...A couple hours in...He's feeling sick again...just as we're getting to a rest stop...He Pukes all over himself, the seat, the floor...Wow did that suck...We clean him up...Get him changed...Clean up the van the best we can...What does he say? "Can get an ice cream cone?" "NO!" I say...My wife chimes in with a "Honey you just threw up. You gotta wait until you're better." Little did we know...he was...That is until we got back on the road...

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Hour later, he's not looking so good... Stop...Puke...Drive...Stop...Puke...Drive...Stop...Puke...Oh this vacation is gonna be awesome! Each time after he puked...He was asking for something to eat...Everytime he was out of the car...he was fine...So the 10 hour drive took a little longer then expected...

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Once we arrived at my Sister-in-law's house...He was fine, and having a blast with his cousins and their dog...The four adults all put our heads together and decided that it had to be car sickness...This was cured for the trip home today with drugs...

Thank God for Chewable Dramamine...We told him it was candy...He took it, and he slept for almost 6 of the 10 hours...And he's sleeping now...See people...Sometimes drugs are good!

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That's all for now...Came home to find out the Central Air unit is p!ssing all over the basement floor...Like We've got the money to fix that now!

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Later, The Beeze.

Going on Vacation

Well gang...The Beeeze Family leaves tomorrow evening, after I get done at the Fish House...Getting away to see family and friends in Boston, and Cape Cod...The Beeze will be off the grid for a week...No twitter...No facebook...No Beezewax...No You Gab Sports...Just drinking, spending quality time with the family, and enjoying a great city....

I can't wait to get there...Just gotta get through that 10 hour drive...Take it easy..."I'm shipping up to Boston!"




Later, The Beeze.

15 Books

It's been awhile since I posted one of those Facebook notes here...Last night I got hit with one, so what the hell...This was is quick and simple...Here we go...

Don’t take too long to think about it. Fifteen books you’ve read that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes. Copy the instructions into your own note, tag 15 friends, and be sure to tag the person who tagged you.

This is in no certain order...

1. Twilight of Innocnce -Badal

2. They Don't Play Hockey in Heaven -Baker

3. Death Be Not Proud -Gunther

4. Siddhartha -Hess

5. To Kill a Mockingbird -Lee

6. Happy Endings -Norton

7. Why My Wife Thinks I'm an Idiot -Greenberg

8. Choke -Palahniuk

9. Ethan Frome -Wharton...I hated it, but I could never shake it.

10. To Kill the Irishman -Porrello

11. In the Wake of the Butcher -Badal

12. The Rest of the Iceberg -Smith

13. They Died Crawling -Bellamy...He's got a whole set of great Cleveland crime books.

14. Holy Blood, Holy Grail...(The book that inspired Dan Brown) - Baigent, Leigh, and Lincoln

15. Why We Suck - Leary

Later, The Beeze

Monday Moaning

So here we are again...Every Monday I post my "Moaning." Sometimes there isn't much, sometimes there's a lot...But there is always Sports involved...I've been sitting here for an hour, wondering what am I gonna write about...Hell the thought crossed my mind a few times today...What's going on in sports? Football training camps haven't started yet...Hockey season just ended...Yeah, there's been some free agent signings...But that's all boring sh!t...You can find that plenty of places...So I'm shootin' from the hip tonight...

What about Baseball? I'll be honest...I've kinda stopped paying attention...The "All-Star" break is here, and I'm just happy that the Indians season is half way over...I blame them...They have broken my spirit...I would watch 90% of their games, or at least listen to them on the radio...This year, that's just not happening...Until Mr. Paul Dolan steps up and takes control of his team, and fires his GM and Manager...I'm done...Seriously! How can you call yourself a business man, and watch your product being run into the ground...(I guess I found something to moan about)

I also think all the steroid blah blah blah beat me down...I'm just sick of all the baggage that seems to come along with Major League Baseball these days...Including the slack ass players who don't take infield and outfield practice anymore...I always loved the skill and beauty that came with playing great defense...Now there's a bunch of hacks out there...And while I'm bashing millionaires...Base running has become a joke too...There are only a handful of players who are great base runners...It may be along time before we see another true "5 tool player."

Time for a little self promotion...If you want to read me trashing a place called The Melting Pot...Click here the following link... http://thebeezestalesfromthefishhouse.blogspot.com/2009/07/beeze-reviews-melting-pot.html

Now some non-sports moaning...I'm going on vacation as of Wednesday night...We're heading to Boston to see family and friends...And already...Before we have even hit the road...Mrs. Beeze's sisters have me stressed out...Apparently there has been some tension between her sisters and things blew up this weekend...Now,my hyper-sensitive wife is upset because all she wanted was a nice, restful, fun, family vacation, with her sisters and all the cousins together...And I'm suppose to bite my tongue if the sh!t hits the fan...Ha! I think we all know the Beeze can snap at anytime...I can see it happening...Sister 1 & 2 are playing nice...Then sister 2 is gonna say something sh!tty about sister 1...Then hyper-sensitive Mrs. Beeze will get upset...So sister 2 says something else shitty to her...Then I go f**king bat shit all over her...Then Mrs. Beeze is pissed at me too...Can't f**king wait!

Okay, just had to get that off my chest...Moving along...Saturday I found out Our Lady Peace will be playing The House of Blues here in Cleveland, Aug.20th...When I got home...Mrs. Beeze showed me again, why she is the sh!t, and why I have to put up with the hyper sensitive stuff...She ordered 2 tickets for us...And later that night she gave me some good lovin' after we watched an okay movie...Eagle Eye...Lots of times you could call bullsh!t, but wtf...It's a movie...

Now if you know the Beeze...You know I love music...And some of my favorites singers ever are female singers...Seriously, nothing better then a great female voice...Well, last week I tweeted something about Richard Cheese...1) Dude is funny as hell, if you don't know him, google that sh!t...2) Yes I'm on twitter...I'm a blogging whore, and it's another way to pimp myself out...Maybe one day I'll get paid to write this drivel...Anywho...After that tweet a lovely young woman who just happened to be opening for Richard Cheese started following me on twitter...And after going to her website and hearing her amazing soulful voice, I started following her...

Checkout Natalie Gelman...





And here is her website>>> http://www.nataliegelman.com/?mpf=frame&

The last thing I want to touch on is this...A friend of mine mentioned this last week, and I feel it needs to be brought up again...Incase you didn't know...Oscar Mayer died last week...Dude showed the world how wonderful and tasty scraps could be...Hot dogs, cold cuts and bacon...I'm sorry, but I would think he deserves more magazine covers, and TV time then Jacko...

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And if you live in California...Just how pissed are you that tax payer money was used for that memorial service...Your state is already broke...WTF!?!

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That's it for now...Have a great week...

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Later, The Beeze.

The Beeze Reviews The Melting Pot

About a week ago, Mrs. Beeze and a couple co-workers made plans for a group of us to go to dinner at The Melting Pot...A fondue place... http://www.meltingpot.com/

It was 6 of us...To protect the not so innocent I'll slightly change their names...Except our server...MIKE...But we'll get to him in a bit...

The sitter showed up and the Mrs. and I went to meet the others...We planned on meeting in the bar first for a couple drinks...When we got there one of the other couples were already into their second drink...Bryan and May...(if you know who I'm talking about, I wasn't very creative with the name change)...These two crazy kids seem to like to drink, so I knew with my personality we'd have fun...May was drinking a Dirty Martini..."But not too dirty, just a little naughty." Bryan was drinking Great Lakes Brewing Company's Grassroots Ale...

What was I drinking? Nothing...At least not for 8 minutes...That's how long it took for the bartender to acknowledge my wife and my existence...When he finally did, she had a Stoli Orange with a splash of tonic...I first asked for a Heineken...He said they didn't have that...WTF!?! kinda place doesn't have Heineken...I could understand if I ordered a PBR...Instead I got a Great Lakes Dortmunder Gold Lager...A few minutes later the hostess took us to our table...

A few minutes later the other couple showed...We'll call them Todd and Laura...About 5 minutes later our server Mike greeted us...(5 minutes is too long...At least where I come from)...Mike with white boy, almost afro, partially in a pony tail...He was quickly dubbed Crazy Hair Mike, by yours truly...Mike asks "who's been here before?"...Only Bryan and May have...So he says he's going to go over things with us...Which we think is good, because the menu can throw you off...He proceeds to go on and on about drinks, and drink specials...Todd orders a Coke, and Laura just wants water...Don't worry Mike we'll make up for it...Bryan and I will have another couple beers...The Mrs. sees Caymus on the menu and she's thinking about a glass...May thinks that sounds good...Before Mike can go into his bottle selling bit...I say, "What the hell bring a bottle!"

Note to servers...This is a sign to treat this table well...Work it...These people are here to spend money...Don't f**k up!

So now we are waiting for our drinks, and trying to figure out what to order...What cheeses...What entrees...What salads...Our drinks take at least 5 minutes...Then Mike finally comes back...We order...Each couple got an entree for two...Ours had a $56 dollar tag on it...It had duck breast, chicken breast, teriyaki steak, pork tenderloin, chicken and veggie pot stickers...You also have to pick you broths to cook you food in...We got the Coq au vin and the Mojo...Each a extra 5 dollars...The wife got a Cesar salad ($5) and I got the Caprese Salad ($5)...

The cheeses for the table were cheddar, and the Wisconsin trio...You better like blue cheese if you get the Wisconsin Trio...But we wouldn't find this out for 30 minutes...You see your cheese is suppose to come out with bread, and veggies, and apples for an appetizer...We continued to drink...Well us drinkers...And waited...and waited...Bryan need to use the rest room...As he went to the front desk for directions...The hostess was taking a call...The call was from May...Asking to have Mike bring us our cheese...After repeating this a couple times the hostess hung up...As she walked Bryan past our table to point him in the right direction...I'm sure she heard boozy May laughing and repeating what happened on the phone...The hostess came back and checked on us...and in about 2 minutes Mike arrived to mix our cheese...

Note to servers...If you work in a place where you are at tables preparing items...It's a good idea to seem friendly and engage in conversation with the table...I mean you are working for tips right?

We also learned from Bryan's recon mission to the Men's Room...There were only 5 tables in the whole place...So what the hell was taking so long...After our cheese and stuff...We waited, and waited, and waited, for our salads...It had gotten to the point where we didn't even want them anymore...When Mike finally brought them out Bryan said...'Oh we don't really want those anymore.' But Mike must have thought we we joking, based on the booze and phone calls...

It was also at this point that a table of jail bait sat right near us, and Mike was giving them plenty of attention...Smart move douche bag...The table ordering diet Coke and apps is gonna get quality service...While the table ordering bottles of wine, $6 beers, and over $200 dollars in food is getting slow sh!tty service...Way to go dummy!

The salads were good...To be honest, my Caprese salad was outstanding...Then we waited a little longer to get our entrees...This is where this company is getting over on people big time...You get your plate full of raw nuggets that you will cook yourself in $5 broths...The Melting Pot doesn't have to pay chefs...Or really anyone with any cooking skill...Just some prep cooks who chop up raw meat, poultry, and sea food...

Was the food good? Yes...Was it great? No...Did we have fun? Yes...We got out of the house, away from the kids for a few hours...Drank plenty...Made fun of our server...Found out the name of May's Vibrator...(She is a funny drunk) And then when we got home I overpaid the sitter, and Mrs. Beeze and I had some sloppy drunk sex!

That said...The bill for The Beezes after tip was $150...For that kinda money, we could have had a really nice meal, with great service, and I would have had to cook my own food...But if you do try The Melting Pot...Get the Caprese salad...The only thing better was the Dortmunder!

Later, The Beeze.

The Beeeze in 2012

Let me first start by saying...If any of this post offends you...Stop taking yourself and life so seriously, and learn to f**king laugh!

I don't often blog my political views because it can cause people to get crazy and angry and silly...But the more I watch these dolts in DC, let alone my local politicians, screw things up the more I think...A) We need a third party...B) We need a real leader with stong convictions and won't back down to all the special interests...and C) I'm that f**king guy!

So I'm now launching my campaign for to be President of the United States, come 2012...

You may be thinking...'Really Beeze? What are you gonna do to fix things?'

1. Legalize Weed...That's right...Lets all stop being so afraid of it...Many people smoke pot...Including some of those bullsh!t artist politicians...Don't give me that it's a gateway drug crap...No it isn't...If people want to try more and different drugs, it wasn't the weed that got them there...It was their own free will to try some different sh!t...It's no worse then drinking alcohol...And it's not even close to being as bad for you as tobacco...So we legalize it...And just as we tax booze and smokes...We tax the weed...I can smell the economy getting better already!

2. Legalize Prostitution...Many of us provide services in our jobs...So do whores...People should stop looking down on them just because the perform acts for money, that most self respecting people wouldn't...I mean seriously...There are very few women out there who are gonna let you bang the hell out of them and then take a sh!t on their face....

The benefits to this...Now we can regulate these b!tches...Have them tested regularly, so there isn't a fear of disease...And most importantly...These gashes are finally paying taxes on all that cash they've been making eating c*ck!

3. Legalize Gay Marriage....Why the f**k not! This has been a stupid battle for too long...If you want to battle me on this or any topic, leave your religion at the door...I spent 12 years getting a Catholic education...So if you try to throw a passage of scripture at me to argue your point...I bet I can come back with one that contradicts yours...Also one of the founding principles of this country was and is....THE SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND STATE...It's about time we get back to that...

Yes marriage is a religious sacrament...But not for everyone...That's why they have a judge do their ceremony...Oh, and lets not forget the LEGAL DOCUMENTATION you need before you can get hitched...Marriage is a CIVIL RIGHT...Have we not learned it's wrong to withhold civil rights from people yet?

And the argument that some gay marriages would just be scams to get benefits for each other is weak...If you don't think Bill and Hilary Clinton's marriage is a scam, then I'm sure I have your support on legalizing weed...There ain't no love or faith in that marriage...That's a high powered business deal...

Why should straight people be the only ones to suffer through marriage?

4. Kill the Old People....Now befor you go ape sh!t, hear me out...Once some one gets to the age where they...A) retire...and/or...B) Start collecting Social Security...They will have to take a test every year...Maybe two...We have to make sure these people are still contributing to society...I mean if they are just there...In the way...Not helping the economy, or providing something useful...They gotta go...

Here's an example...Where I work...The Fish House...There is this old f**ker who comes in and sits at the bar, at least 5 days a week...He annoys the bartenders...He annoys guests...He doesn't shut up...He thinks he knows it all...After a couple drinks he starts rubbing on any and every women he sees...He's a total pain in the ass...But you know what...He's spending money...He's buying drinks and sometimes even food...Yeah he may be drooling all over the ladies, but at least he's not living off the tax payers drooling all over himself...He's doing his part for the economy....

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Alright people...That's just the begining of my platform...Hell, if a half African American man, with the middle name Hussein can be president...Why the hell shouldn't I take my crack at it...Seriously...I got better sh!t to say then that dolt Joe the plumber...

And if you have any questions on any other issues...I'll answer them...None of that political side stepping...Just the Beeze tellin' it Like I see I see it!

The Beeze 2012...RED, WHITE, and F**K YOU!

Later, The Beeze.

Words

Today...Maybe yesterday...Whatever it may be...I lost some one I considered a friend...I never actually had the chance to meet this person...It was a blogging friend I guess...(don't get me wrong, I have blogging friends that I truly consider friends, but then there are some you hardly know) I thought I knew this person...Our only communication was through our blogs and comments and sometimes an email...

Why did I lose this friend? Because of my blog...Because of words...I guess we disagreed on something...And I wrote things that weren't liked...I've always felt that disagreeing could make for a good conversation...I don't even think that we were that far off from each other...

Some would say, 'they're only words.' Some would say that 'there's nothing more powerful then words.' Some would say 'silence speaks louder then words.' Maybe all three points are right, or at least true at sometime...

I will always apologize if my words hurt people...And I did...But from day one, not just on this blog, but in life...I always say what I feel or think, at any given time...That's me...That's how I deal with my thoughts, my anger, my sadness, my stress, my goofiness, or whatever is going on in my head, and yes even my heart...

That's what this has always been about...This blog is for me...If you want to come along for the ride...Great...If not, That's cool too...

So to any and all readers...If I offend you...If I upset you...If I piss you off...If I make you laugh...If I make you think...If I do anything at all...Good! Haha! Too bad! I'm sorry!

But they're only f**king words...My words at that.

Later, The Beeze.

Maybe I'm Cold But....

I posted the following last night about 2:00 AM at Sporting News...I had read a post from dude I never heard of or read before...And I thought, This guy is a f**king idiot...I also think that my point behind my reserved commets yesterday were missed by some...so here it is for everyone else...

I'm sick of the idiots in the media...You know, Like most those dolts at ESPN...Hell there are some bloggers I've read since Saturday, that make me want to puke in my soup....

Listen, Steve McNair was shot and killed by a 20 year old girl he was banging on the side...He had a wife, and 4 kids...Even though I was a fan of the guy...Him cheating on his wife makes him a first class douche in my book...I don't give a crap what he did on the field...I don't care anymore about the great things he did off the field...Were they good? YES. But I don't want to hear the guy being praised for it right now...I don't wan t to hear these idiots talking about his "Legacy" as a player...F**k that!

4 kids no longer have their father...Why? Because he was an idiot who couldn't keep his dick in his pants...Now a mother has to deal with explaining it...and cope with it...and has to raise those kids on her own...So to me, Steve McNair's "legacy" is that he was an a$$hole!

One blogger here at SN wrote this whole thing I didn't agree with...I've never read his blog before...but I can imagine that we wouldn't see eye to eye often...He wrote about us as people and the media tarnishing McNair's name...NOPE! He did that all on his own...He wrote about undeserved attacks...Nope! they aren't...I'm tired of society's love-fest with "celebrities"...especially the ones that are douche bags....Here's what I posted on his blog...I believe his name is Naptown Ref....

"To me, what somebody does as a professional athlete doesn't really matter...It's just sports...What matters is what kind of person you are, and McNair clearly fooled people...The attacks are not undeserved...He was a piece of crap...He tarnished his name...Not me and not anyone else...He stuck his dick where he shouldn't have...

What I find offensive is the people going on about this douche and his legacy as a football player...4 kids no longer have a father, and their mother is left alone to try and explain this and deal with it and raise those kids...Those are the people who we should be concerned about...not some dead idiot athlete!"

Am I wrong...Maybe...But I never think so.

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

Happy 4th of July if you missed me saying it here, or at You Gab Sports, or at Sporting News, or on Twitter, or on Facebook...

Was there any sports going on to talk about? I gotta tell ya, I spent hardly any time paying attention to sports this weekend...I've watched about 2 innings of baseball...That's it...I think it was the red hats...Hey I like red...and I like hats...Just ask the guys at LIDS! And I'm all about being patriotic...But MLB, could we maybe have had one team where red caps and the other wear blue?

For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about...Major League Baseball had every team wearing red hats this weekend with the team logo filled in with an American flag design...I think they did for Memorial day also...But it was too much red, and the Oakland A's look silly enough with there white shoes...Then you add a red cap with their green and yellow gear, and they are gay guy's nightmare! (don't be offended, gay guys love me...But I ain't gonna be a bottom...it's a joke)

The finals were held at Wimbledon and the match Federer and Roddick put on was amazing...Well, okay, I only watched the last set, but Christ it was as long as 3 sets...I was pulling for Roddick...Always go with the Underdog...Especially if he is an American who could sh!t all over some Swiss dudes record! unfortunately Roddick lost, but it was a hell of a match....

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Now to the sad sports news...Former NFL quarterback Steve McNair was found shot to death on Saturday...I'm not going to speculate on what all happened between McNair and the young woman who's body was found with his...I just feel sorrow for his wife and children...

I heard some of the talking heads on TV and radio discussing what this would do to his legacy as football player and as somebody who has always been well respected for his good deeds...Who the f**k cares!?! Kids lost their father...And a mother is left to try and explain it and raise them on her own...There are seriously times when the media are total f**king idiots...And based on the last week or so, they really show off how stupid they are when celebrities die...

In a little hockey news...The free agency madness has started...My Rangers signed the often injured Marian Gaborik to 5 year, 7.5 million dollar contract...The Chicago Blackhawks signed Marian Hossa to a 12 year deal...WTF!?! I guess the 'Hawks don't want to win the Cup for another 12 years! (and what's with all these dudes named Marian?) Martin Havlat left Chicago and jumped into Gaborik's spot in Minnesota...And a move that made me happy...The Columbus Blue Jackets signed Captain Rick Nash to a 8 year extension... http://www.yougabsports.com/?cmd=blog&nid=358041&ptitle=Columbus-Blue-Jackets-Make-a-Great-Move

But seriously...I'm tired from all the drinking I've done since Thursday night...So for any and all NHL moves stop over here.... http://www.nhl.com/

Thursday night Mrs. Beeze and I went out for dinner with two other couples, at this fondue place called The Melting Pot...Fondon't! I put down some notes that night and I'll be posting a review in the next day or two...But let's just say, if you are in the restaurant, and you have to call the restaurant to get your server to bring something...anything, to your table...The review isn't gonna be good! But we did get a nice buzz on, and had fun...And of course, some sloppy drunk sex!

Friday, I wanted to call off work and drive up to Buffalo to see Our Lady Peace...But I didn't...(There are videos from that show at the bottom of the sidebar) I went to work...Which was stupid and slow as hell...We were suppose to go to a party at an old friend's house that night...As we were getting ready...We had put some cream on the little Beeze, for his eczema...It was a new cream we were trying...He broke out with an allergic reaction in seconds....Off to the hospital...No party...It took a couple hours for it to settle down...After we got home, everyone went to bed...Except me...I drank...

Saturday, we had a birthday party to go to...Friends of ours son was turning the BIG 01...That's right 1 year old party...Which means...Excuse for adults to drink! BTW...I got little dude a sweet, green, Notre Dame #3 Jersey...It was on sale at LIDS...

I spent some quality time with our one friends baby...Which was giving me that it wouldn't be so bad to have another one feeling...Mind you I was buzzed...But this little peanut was cute, and kept drinking my beer...She's just like her mom!

The kids had a blast...My wife sucks at corn hole...I'm alright...But she sucks...And when the hell did corn hole go from sticking things in somebody's ass to tossing little sacks of corn at a wood board with a little hole cut out!?!

After we got home we watched some fireworks in the neighborhood, and watched Neil Diamond rock out with the Boston Pops...

Sunday was a lazy day...Thank God...And we got the big news...We took a pregnancy test a couple days before, and it was negative...But I don't trust those...Just like birth control, they're not 1000%...When I woke up, I was given the news that Aunt Flo had arrived...."And there was much rejoicing!"

That's it for now...Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.

Jackets Make a Great Move

The Columbus Blue Jackets signed captain Rick Nash to a eight year contract extension...The extension starts in 2010 and goes through 2018...

This is a great move for the team and the fan base...But they still need to get Nash some more help...

GM Scott Howson said..."Rick is a Blue Jacket. He is our captain, the foundation of our team and one of the elite players in the National Hockey League and we are very happy that he will continue to call Columbus home for many years to come."

Nash's (25 years old) career numbers are...194 goals...161 assists for 355 points in 441 games.

In other Blue Jacket news...Columbus signed goalie Mathieu Garon to a 2 year deal, giving the team a solid backup for Calder winner Steve Mason...

Speaking of Mason...He, along with Nash have been invited to Canada's National Men's Team orientation camp, as candidates for upcoming international events including the 2010 Winter Olympics and 2010 IIHF World Championship...

Some good news coming out of Columbus this week...

Have a great 4th of July gang...Don't blow your fingers off!

Later, The Beeze.

Passing Out Some More Skull F**ks!

This is a special edition of the Beeze's Skull F**ks...With the exception of one...All those getting blasted in the face tonight are General Managers of sports franchises...
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First up is Neal Huntington of the Pittsburgh Pirates...

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He's the douche on the right...First a few weeks ago he traded young, rising, Pirate star, outfielder, Nate McLouth for a few prospects...Now I've heard these prospects have great potential...But that's all it is...Potential...McLouth had the makings of a franchise player...But the Pirates like to play it cheap...

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Then yesterday the traded Nyjer Morgan...Morgan has become a fan favorite and is another exciting, talented, player the Pirates could have been a core player on a young team...But no such luck...In return Pittsburgh got the most overrated, over hyped prospect baseball has...Lastings Milledge...Milledge has been talked about for a few years now but can't stay healthy and can't stay with a team...Also involved in the deal...The Pirates sent pitcher Sean Burnett to Washington and got Joel Hanrahan in return...

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Hanrahan's record is 0-3 with a 7.71 ERA in 34 games -- he has been demoted from the closer's job...In 115 career games he has a 5.30 ERA...

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Burnett, who was Pittsburgh's top pick in 2000...Has a 1-2 with a 3.06 ERA in 38 games...

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You know why he's got that eye patch? 'Cause the Beeze just went balls deep in him!

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Next is my favorite...Indians GM Mark Shapiro...

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In case you missed Monday Moaning...I'm not happy with the sh!t trade he made this weekend with the Cardinals...Sending Mark DeRosa there for (P) Chris Perez and a player to be named later...Perez in his first outing went .2 innings and gave up 4 runs...Douche bag! Shapiro said there was lots of interest in DeRosa and he got the best value there was...Really?

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Well, you're about to get a hell of a value right up in your face Mark...And while I'm at it...I'll hit that piece of crap Eric Wedge standing next to you...He must give great head...Because any other team would have sh!t canned him by now...

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Now onto Glen Sather....

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The New York Rangers GM made some moves the last couple days...I like the trade of Scott Gomez and getting Chris Higgins in return...Getting rid of Gomez's salary was great...Overrated b!tch...But then he let Colton Orr slip away and sign with the Maple Leafs...What did he do to get some muscle back...He signed first class douche, cheap shot, f**king a$$hole Donald Brashear...I can't root for this guy...I don't know how any Rangers fan could...I'm hoping he is injured in traing camp and done...For good...

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Then with the extra money lying around....He signed Marian Gaborik...The reports are saying 5 years...7.5 million a year...Wow! I say Wow because, while Gaborik is an amazingly talented player...He has also never had a year without injuries...And from everything he has said Gaborik is the only high profile guy they were targeting...Not a trade for Heatley...Not Hossa, who it looks like will sign with Chicago...

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As a Rangers fan, the Brashear move makes me angry...The Gaborik move makes me worry...5 years and lots of money tied up in a guy who can't stay healthy...So tonight Sather is getting a load from the Beeze.

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And lastly tonight...People who smoke, but never have any cigarettes or a lighter...

I'm not a smoker...In my youth I was...But I realized it wasn't gonna help my asthma or my hockey game...And I also realized why should I pay for cancer...But anyway...I work in a place I lovingly refer to as "The Fish House"...There seem to be a lot of smokers in the restaurant business..

That's fine...It's up to them...But I couldn't stand this when I smoked, and it still bugs the sh!t out of me today...If you want to smoke...Buy a pack d!ck head...If you smoke...Why the f**k don't you have a lighter...It's always the same douche bags...Some of the f**k stains ask me for a light, even though they know I don't smoke...If you want to partake in this habit...Stop being a lazy, cheap bastard and buy your own smokes and lighter...You existence is enough of a burden on the world...Don't pester us to help you get cancer...Choke on some of this!

That's it for tonight...

Later, The Beeze.