Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Passing Out Some More Skull F**ks!

This is a special edition of the Beeze's Skull F**ks...With the exception of one...All those getting blasted in the face tonight are General Managers of sports franchises...
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First up is Neal Huntington of the Pittsburgh Pirates...
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He's the douche on the right...First a few weeks ago he traded young, rising, Pirate star, outfielder, Nate McLouth for a few prospects...Now I've heard these prospects have great potential...But that's all it is...Potential...McLouth had the makings of a franchise player...But the Pirates like to play it cheap...
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Then yesterday the traded Nyjer Morgan...Morgan has become a fan favorite and is another exciting, talented, player the Pirates could have been a core player on a young team...But no such luck...In return Pittsburgh got the most overrated, over hyped prospect baseball has...Lastings Milledge...Milledge has been talked about for a few years now but can't stay healthy and can't stay with a team...Also involved in the deal...The Pirates sent pitcher Sean Burnett to Washington and got Joel Hanrahan in return...
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Hanrahan's record is 0-3 with a 7.71 ERA in 34 games -- he has been demoted from the closer's job...In 115 career games he has a 5.30 ERA...
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Burnett, who was Pittsburgh's top pick in 2000...Has a 1-2 with a 3.06 ERA in 38 games...
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You know why he's got that eye patch? 'Cause the Beeze just went balls deep in him!
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Next is my favorite...Indians GM Mark Shapiro...
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In case you missed Monday Moaning...I'm not happy with the sh!t trade he made this weekend with the Cardinals...Sending Mark DeRosa there for (P) Chris Perez and a player to be named later...Perez in his first outing went .2 innings and gave up 4 runs...Douche bag! Shapiro said there was lots of interest in DeRosa and he got the best value there was...Really?
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Well, you're about to get a hell of a value right up in your face Mark...And while I'm at it...I'll hit that piece of crap Eric Wedge standing next to you...He must give great head...Because any other team would have sh!t canned him by now...
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Now onto Glen Sather....
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The New York Rangers GM made some moves the last couple days...I like the trade of Scott Gomez and getting Chris Higgins in return...Getting rid of Gomez's salary was great...Overrated b!tch...But then he let Colton Orr slip away and sign with the Maple Leafs...What did he do to get some muscle back...He signed first class douche, cheap shot, f**king a$$hole Donald Brashear...I can't root for this guy...I don't know how any Rangers fan could...I'm hoping he is injured in traing camp and done...For good...
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Then with the extra money lying around....He signed Marian Gaborik...The reports are saying 5 years...7.5 million a year...Wow! I say Wow because, while Gaborik is an amazingly talented player...He has also never had a year without injuries...And from everything he has said Gaborik is the only high profile guy they were targeting...Not a trade for Heatley...Not Hossa, who it looks like will sign with Chicago...
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As a Rangers fan, the Brashear move makes me angry...The Gaborik move makes me worry...5 years and lots of money tied up in a guy who can't stay healthy...So tonight Sather is getting a load from the Beeze.
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And lastly tonight...People who smoke, but never have any cigarettes or a lighter...

I'm not a smoker...In my youth I was...But I realized it wasn't gonna help my asthma or my hockey game...And I also realized why should I pay for cancer...But anyway...I work in a place I lovingly refer to as "The Fish House"...There seem to be a lot of smokers in the restaurant business..

That's fine...It's up to them...But I couldn't stand this when I smoked, and it still bugs the sh!t out of me today...If you want to smoke...Buy a pack d!ck head...If you smoke...Why the f**k don't you have a lighter...It's always the same douche bags...Some of the f**k stains ask me for a light, even though they know I don't smoke...If you want to partake in this habit...Stop being a lazy, cheap bastard and buy your own smokes and lighter...You existence is enough of a burden on the world...Don't pester us to help you get cancer...Choke on some of this!

That's it for tonight...

Later, The Beeze.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

AWESOME!

specially the ciggy one........LMAO!

Anonymous said...

Well ... you seemed to go through some GMs. Given the Browns have a new one, he still has slack.

How the Indians have landed so thin on pitching is beyond me. Gotta wonder how long this GM-Mgr combo will last.