The Beeze's Hump Day Hits

LOOK AT THAT ASS!!!!!!!


My buddy Steve asked me to do a special edition of my Hump Day post, dedicated to Ines Sainz...If you don't know, she is a reporter who says she was subjected Sexually Harassing comments from New York Jets players...Well, those guys do like to talk shit...And when you dress the way she does, should we really be surprised?

Personally, I don't care if the Jets get in trouble, because they have been earning a reputation for being big-mouth dolts...I also don't give a shit if she was offended...If you dress the way she does, you want people to look at you...You want guys to want to fuck you...So then a guy says something, and you get offended...GO SCREW!!! Take it as a complement and be happy somebody still want to lay the wood to you, because in a few years, that ass is going to look like a bucket of cottage cheese...

I wonder how Bill Burr feels about this? Let's see what he said on his Monday Morning Podcast...




Well with that said, will close this Hump Day by looking at Ines' lovely hump!

I'd love to be balls deep in that!

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

Perspective...That is going to be the focus of this blog today...Those breasts above look great don't they!?! And that isn't the only way to look at breasts...Hell it's not the most traditional view...These next breasts, from a different perspective, look great too...


Now some may prefer the top breasts...Some may prefer the bottom...It's all how you look at things...You may be asking, 'Beeze what the hell does tits and perspective have to do with anything?' Well, that's why I'm hear...To tell you...

When I was watching the Notre Dame, Michigan game Saturday, I was thinking the Notre Dame defense was playing well and keeping the team in the game, until Dayne Crist could get back from an injury, get some points on the board...Then after the game...After the loss...After the defense folded...I saw the stats...The Irish defense gave up 532 yards of total offense...Once I sat down and looked at the stats, I had a different perspective on how the defense played...To read more about the game, click HERE.

Do you need another example...How about the end of the Lions, Bears game Sunday...The game ended on a controversial call...A bomb to the end zone, caught by Calvin Johnson, in the end zone, both feet came down, with possession of the ball...

Then his body hit the ground...

Then he rolled over, with the ball still firmly in his hand, pushed himself up off the ground, with the ball, and dropped it...The touchdown had already been signaled, and the Lions celebrated...Then it was waved off and called an incomplete pass...

Every replay showed he had the ball in his possession...If a player dives for the goal-line and the ball breaks the plane and then falls out of his hand immediately, it is always called a touchdown...Johnson caught the ball...Both feet landed, the his body hit the ground...The whole time he maintained possession...This was one of the worst calls I've seen in a long time...And it screwed the Lions out of win...Something that hasn't been easy for them to come by...

Clearly the refs and the replay officials perspective was completely fucked...Here's a link to the VIDEO ...Watch it while you can...NFL.com has yanked it down once already...They know they fucked up! At least that's my perspective!

Then watching the Browns game Sunday, I have to wonder what the hell perspective was Mike Holmgren looking at Jake Delhomme from...Holy shit does this guy suck...The passes he tried to throw today were ridiculous...Let's see...He's 10 years older than Derek Anderson...He's getting paid what Anderson would have gotten paid...And he threw 2 interceptions today, just Anderson would have...Anderson actually only threw one Sunday...

My perspective changed today about Peyton Hillis...During the Browns game I was loving how the fullback/halfback was running the ball...Hillis had 9 carries for 41 yards and a touchdown, along with 4 receptions for 24 yards...The problem is, he fumbled the ball twice, and lost one of them...Oh and the Browns lost 17-14 to Tampa Bay...

Apparently Darrelle Revis has a different perspective on what a contract is from many of us...Revis' new deal is a 4 year deal for $46 million...Then Peter King, who I personally think is an ass, and often wrong, asked Revis in an interview, if he planned to hold out again after making almost $32 million in the 2010-2011 season...Revis' response, "That's a great question. If I continue to play ball like I usually do, we'll probably be back at the same position we were this year."

My perspective on Revis...He's an asshole!

It's all about perspective folks...Let me end this with a question...What's your perspective on these pictures...

Are these girls about to workout, or are they just being a couple of cock teases?

How about these two...Are they in love? Are they lesbians? Or are they just being cock teases?

Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.

Irish Fall to Michigan...Okay They Fell To Denard Robinson

In what may have been the most exciting game on Saturday, I had to watch my Fighting Irish lose to rival Michigan...By Michigan I mean the one man wrecking crew that is Denard Robinson...

The Irish defense gave up 532 total yards to Michigan...Robinson threw for 244 of those yards, and 1 touchdown...and he rushed for 258 of their 288 yards on the ground...Oh and added two touchdowns on the ground...

The Notre Dame offense put up 535 yards of total offense, which is a bit surprising since starting Quarterback Dayne Crist was out for most of the first half after losing vision in his right eye on a one yard touchdown run...The lack of depth, talent, and experience at QB showed...But Crist let his team back from a 21-7 deficit in the second half...Late in the 4th quarter Crist connected with Tight End Kyle Rudolph for a 95 yard touchdown strike...The Irish were up 24-21...It was time for the defense to do what they couldn't do under Charlie Weis...It was time to finish...

But Robinson wouldn't be denied...He lead the Wolverines on 72 yard game winning drive...Michigan goes up 28-24 with 27 seconds left...Notre Dame has one last shot...I guess the defense still needs to work on that finishing thing, huh?

Crist quickly moved the Irish into scoring position...With six seconds left he had one shot at the end zone, but didn't give his talented group of big receivers a shot for a jump-ball...Instead he sailed the ball into the Michigan band...

Another bitter loss to Michigan has ruined another weekend for me...That said, watch out Big-Ten...Looks like Rich Rod has his QB and system in place...Everyone in Michigan was ready to shit-can this guy, but I think that has changed after last weeks win over UConn, and now this win over ND...Now the question is how far can Robinson take this team? Another question...Are the teams in the Big-Ten ready to try and stop this guy? Denard Robinson is going to make things a little more interesting...

For the Irish...Watching this game film won't be fun...Something tells me it's going to be a tough week of practice for the defense...

Later, The Beeze.

Virginia Tech F*cks Things Up for Boise State

After all the love I've given to Boise State...After having to defend what they do each year...After their win over Virginia Tech Monday, what do the Hokies do...They f*ck Boise State in the ass...How?

The Virginia Tech Hokies just lost 21-16 to James Madison...James f*cking Madison! The Dukes came back from being down 16-7, and beat the Hokies in Blacksburg, Virginia!

Virginia Tech, you just lost to Division 1-AA James Madison, and in the process, screwed Boise State...What are you going to do next?

I'll tell you what you should do...Eat a dick!

Later, the Beeze.

Joe Montana is a Douche!

Last year I had to call out Joe Montana, and I guess it needs to be done again...Yes, I'm a Notre Dame guy, but I don't have the same love and affection for Montana that many others do...He's a dick! Plain and simple...Fun fact time...Montana grew up in South Western PA...So did my mom...When their high school reunion time came around, and the committee contacted him to see if he would be coming, his response was, "How much are you going to pay me?" That was it for me...Instant douche!

Then today I read that Montana was on the radio/TV, dogging "Rudy" the famous movie about Notre Dame football player Rudy Ruettiger...Montana felt the need to tell everyone that there was no one chanting "RUDY" as the movie depicts...He also talked about the emotional scene when all the players lay their jerseys down on the coach's desk, telling him to give Rudy their spot...Hey Joe, it's Hollywood, people know that they add bullshit to movies...Also, anyone who really likes the movie knows that's bullshit, because we've seen countless interviews with Rudy, and other people involved who said it was added for the emotional boost it gave the story...

Then Montana even called Rudy getting carried off the field by teammates bullshit...In his eyes, it wasn't about the players being excited, or happy for this hard-working nobody...This is his thought... "I won't say as a joke. But, playing around." Joe Montana is working his way into the Skull F*ck Hall of Fame!

Joe sounds, bitter and jealous...Joey, are you sad that nobody wants to make a movie about you? That's just too bad Joe...The porn industry has flooded the market with movies about C*nts and Assholes!

One last thing Joe...Your kid is 3rd string and he sucks!

F*ck Michigan! F*ck Joe Montana! And GO IRISH!

Later, The Beeze.

The Beeze's Hump Day Hits

I'm posting this early...I know some people hate when I post it late in the day...So lets get to it...

I'm actually not sure what I'm going to write about...I blasted off THIS rant about people disrespecting Boise State, and now I'm wondering what's next?

A couple friends like B-Dub and fan82 about some bible thumpers in Florida who want to commemorate 9/11 by burning copies of the Qur'an...Ummm, I would guess that these fuck-tards in Florida are probably intensely religious people, who would shit a brick if some one accidentally burned a Bible, let alone organized a Bible burning event...Maybe some Jews should organize a Bible burning at the site of Auschwitz, since the Catholic Church turned a blind on to that for awhile...How would that feel fuck-stains!?!

I've ranted about the "Ground Zero" Mosque before, I'm sure you know how I feel by now...Comedian Nick DiPaolo has a nice idea...



I heard about Derrelle Revis Sunday night, and threw it in Monday's post...Now the numbers are coming out...Looks like Revis' agents screwed up...They were asking for 10 years and $120 million or more...What did he get? 4 years for $46 million...He had 3 years for $21 million left on his original deal...So he ended getting a one year extension with a slight raise...They tried to play the 'I want to be a life long Jet, and retire here' card...In the end that was crap...The just wanted the guaranteed money...Which looks to be $32 million...There are already rumors of the Jets redoing the deal next year, since Revis will be due $25 million in 2011...So the drama will continue...

But it's Hump Day people...And there's only one thing that should be on our minds...So on this fine Hump Day...Which of these beauties would you most like to run up in?


A. Jenna Renee or 'Cupcake'

B. Valerie Marie


C. Brooklyn Decker

Later, The Beeze.

Defending Boise State

I really shouldn't have to do this, but there seems to be a lot of c*nts out there with their panties all bunched up in their gash over the Boise State Broncos...They didn't like the Broncos being ranked so high to begin with, but after they beat Virginia Tech last night, there were even more rumblings about Boise possibly getting a crack at the BCS Championship Game...

First, it was only week one...Nobody should be talking about the BCS Championship...You sure as hell didn't hear Boise State coach Chris Petersen talking about it last night...He knew they didn't play their best game...

Second, the majority of the Boise State haters are coming from two places...The SEC and The Big-Ten...Both conferences and their fans have huge egos...We often hear or read that the SEC is the best conference in College Football...Really? You have Alabama, Florida, LSU, sometimes Georgia (not this year) and Auburn, or Tennessee(not this year) or Arkansas (I like them this year)...Then the other half of the conference is average, or below average...Awesome!!! Sometimes half your conference is really good! Way to go!

Don't worry Big-Ten, I didn't forget about you...This conference loves to talk about their storied history of hard-nosed, Midwest, football...Christ they love themselves...Funny since only Ohio State has been competitive in the BCS rankings over the last 5 years...Last year 6 of the teams in the Big-Ten had records below
.500...Not much to brag about there gang!

Third, SEC and Big-Ten schools refuse to play Boise State...That's right the people hating on Boise State, are the ones who don't want any part of them...At least the Big-12, Pac-10, and ACC give them shot...Oh, and when the Broncos get that shot, they win! They'll play anyone, anywhere, anytime, and they'll win...Lori SEC, and Johnny Big-Ten won't schedule them, because they know what will happen...They saw it again last night...

Later, The Beeze

Monday Moaning

For those who are use to reading my Monday Moaning post, you're probably use to an opening image like the one above...You also expect some sports coverage...For those new to this blog, or even those who have been here before, you may be wondering what does this picture have to do with sports? If there is anything that should be considered a sport that isn't, what's going on there sure as hell should be!

Over the past few years that I've been blogging, my posts and sometimes my comments on others' blogs, have offended people...Including little things like that picture...So I ask, if it offends you, why do you read it? I'll tell you why...That picture peaked your interest, and you're wondering, will I offend you today, of make you laugh, or make you think...That's one of the two reasons I write...

1. I write to get all the voices out of my head...I'm trying to get my emotions out, so I can go to sleep already...But I'm not that guy that just says I write for me...What good is it if nobody actually reads it? This leads us to number 2. By doing this, I'm trying to draw an emotion from you...If what I write makes you laugh, pisses you off, or makes you think....I win! I have done what I've set out to do...You may not like what I said, but if it affected you in some way, that's a good thing...I hope that clears things up with some of my haters...If not, tough shit I guess!

Now to some sports...

Of course I'm starting off with Notre Dame football! Why the f*ck wouldn't I? The Fighting Irish opened the Brian Kelly era with a 23-12 win...Were they outstanding? No...Were they good? Yes...It was nice to hear Kelly afterwards already thinking about what they need to work on...

The Defense had been questionable the last few years under Fatty Weis...They played okay, including two picks, but they still have plenty of work to do...Especially getting more pressure on the QB...

The Offense played well...Their third series, the O-Line started blowing the Purdue Defense off the ball...Both Armando Allen, and Cierre Wood ran the ball well...I would love to see the Irish be able to pound it down people's throats...

I'm not going to get too excited over this win, but since Kelly was hired, I've felt like he's the right guy for this program...The Irish should win at least 8 games this year, and if the continue to progress under Kelly, 10 games could be possible...That said, I expected them to thump Michigan next week, but after the game the Wolverines played against UConn, the Irish better be ready for a battle...

Nothing comes easy in College Football...Just ask Ole Miss...I know everyone has mentioned it, but screw it...Jacksonville State beat Ole Miss 49-48 in overtime Saturday, and it's worth mentioning again!

The NFL season opens Thursday, which means some important shit had to happen this weekend...Mainly, drafting for my two fantasy football leagues...And as always, I feel confident that I'll beat all your assess! I won't bore you with my rosters, just know I'll be taking some people's money!

Moving along...By now we've all heard about the little scuffle at the U.S. Open...Now the "Situation" looking guy has been taking some shit, and as much as I don't want to stick up for his Italian, "Jersey Shore" ass, dude was in the right...F*ck that bitch, and that old guy, and all the other haters...Knock that old f*cker down "Situation"!




BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!

Derrelle Revis will be signing with the Jets Monday! No terms available right now, but it's rumored to be a 7 year deal, with a shit-load of money!

Before I go, I hope everyone has had, and will continue to have a great Labor Day weekend...The Beeze family checked out our local high school game Friday night...Saturday night the Mrs. and I got out of the House for awhile...A little dinner and a MOVIE...Sunday friends of ours came to town for the Air Show...F*cking Blue Angels are amazing! Monday, I plan on relaxing...It's Labor Day...We all should relax and take a break from the grind...Just like Peter Gibbons...



Later, The Beeze.

I Want My Two Hours Back!

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!! If you want to see this movie...If you want to waste your hard earned money on it...If you want to waste your time seeing this movie...DON'T READ ANYMORE OF THIS POST!

Tonight, after one of my two fantasy football drafts this weekend, our sitter came over and we got the hell out of here! We had dinner at Texas Road House...It may be a chain, but damn, it's great every time. After that we stopped at TJ MAXX, grabbed a couple things for the baby...Found a cool birthday gift for the Little Beeze...(gotta find a good hiding place for that) And we got both the kids new Fall coats...

Then we went over to the movie theater to see "The American"...2 tickets for the George Clooney Sleep Aid please! Okay, I didn't say that...How could I? From all the hype and previews, this movie was suppose to be full of suspense, action, and intrigue...Well, not so much gang! The opening credits should have tipped us off...Watching paint dry brings more to the table then the opening...5 minutes in, I felt like I had invested 20 minutes...There was no suspense or intrigue...Seriously, the story was easy to figure out...You knew exactly where it was going...And by the way, the story sucked!

As for action...Not so much...the most action was during a sex scene Clooney has with a prostitute, and even that got drawn out and boring...Bitch could have at least gone ass to mouth!

One hour in, I w felt like we were 2 hours into it...I wanted to leave, but fuck it...I was riding this out, just so I could come home and bash the shit out of it on this blog...The story had so much dead space, they constantly filled it with these dull, slow, overhead scenes of Clooney's stupid car driving from one place to the next...First to this town were he was staying...Then to the pay phone in that town...Then to his place...Then to the whore house...Then to his place...then to the pay phone...Then to woods...Then to his place...Then to the whore house...All this driving is not helping the environment George!

The only good thing that can come from this movie is sleep...Seriously, this one will knock you right out...The only positive thing that happened in the movie...(Remember, SPOILER ALERT) Clooney dies at the end! Too bad nobody shot the writer and director!

Later, The Beeze.

Axl and Some Guys That Aren't Slash

You remember Axl Rose...Big ego! Douchebag...Killed one of the best rock & roll bands there was...Well, he's kept the Guns & Roses name, and the big ego, and the douchebaggery...People have been waiting and waiting to see this new version of G & R, and it seems Axl was up to the same old tricks...

The folks in Dublin weren't very happy about about having to wait until 10:25PM before the band took the stage...They opened with a douche doing his best impression of Slash, on "Welcome to the Jungle" ...Top hat included...But it ended quickly as the Dubliners bombarded Axl with bottles...Have a look...




Once a douche, always a douche I guess! I always hated that prick...I guess I'm not the only Irishman that does!

Later, The Beeze.

It's Okay to Call a 7 Year Old Girl a C*** ....

...No Really...It's okay to call a 7 year old girl a C_NT, when she acts like this little bitch!




What a CUNextTuseday!

I'll never worry again about my parenting skills...This kids parents should both have a talk with the business end of a shotgun!

Later, The Beeze.

The Beeze's Hump Day Hits

Well here we are again...Time to get our Hump on!

It's the most wonderful time of the year folks...Football season is here...Yes, I'm a huge Hockey fan, and there's nothing better than the Stanley Cup Playoffs...But growing up in North East Ohio, it is all about Football...And here, the season started last Friday...The kids and I followed the High School Band down to the stadium, and watched our team take on their neighborhood rival...The owned us, 26-0...They needed to get payback for the beating we gave them last year...

Tomorrow night the College Football season kicks off with a few games...A little warm up for Saturday...Ahhh, Saturday...Fighting Irish Football returns as they take on Purdue...The first step to the turnaround many of us have been waiting for...I'm ready for it!



I have to fired up for College Football, because living in Cleveland, I don't have much faith in the Browns...Thank God there's Fantasy Football to keep me interested in the NFL...Speaking of Fantasy Football, here's a tip from the Beeze...

DON'T DRAFT THAT HACK MATT LEINART! While you're at it, just avoid drafting any Arizona Cardinals...If Derek Anderson starts, he'll throw just as many to the opposing team as he will to his own guys...Believe me, I saw him do it last year! Cardinals receivers numbers will be down...And don't think Beanie Wells will be the key...teams are gonna put 8 in the box to stop the run, 'cause they don't fear anyone at the QB position...

Back to College Football...Many expected the University of North Carolina Tar Heels to have big season this year...Well, things aren't looking so good anymore...As the 'Heels are getting ready to open their season, they're being investigated by the NCAA for multiple violations...There are rumors of players having contact with an agent...Also there has been even more talk about some inappropriate academic behavior having to do with the teams former tutor...Accusations include, the tutor doing assignments for some of the players...It's also been said the tutor also worked for Coach Butch Davis' family...Well, Butch, you were dolt in Cleveland, why would that change just 'cause you moved back down south?

Now to the important stuff...On this fine Hump Day, which cheerleader tops your preseason rankings...


A. Some Beaver power from Oregon State!



B. How about some practice time with a Sooner?



C. Who wants to see if those Clemson Tigers growl?

D. Is it always Christmas at Arizona State?

E. The Wolfpack seems flexible at NC State!

As Always, read and Respond...

Later, The Beeze.