Thursday, March 4, 2010

My Trip to the Oral Surgeon


The above picture shows what it felt like had happened to me Monday morning...

Let me start by saying I've never been to a dentist and not left feeling worse...I have had nothing but bad experiences ever since I was a kid...It's sad because when I was little I always said I wanted to be a comedian or a dentist...Then some prick got a hols of my teeth and f**ked the dentist idea up...

The first biggie was when I was having a root canal on one of my front teeth and the the dentist said "Oh shit!" A couple weeks later I had to go back so he could "Clean things up." Whatever the hell that meant...

Then there were a couple cavities that needed fixed...except these ass-hats never seem to be able to numb me enough...They informed me I seem to have some extra nerve activity in my lower jaw...

Then I needed my Wisdom Teeth out...Some how in my big mouth there wasn't enough room for them, and they had crashed into my back molars and busted a couple of those up...For that they put me to sleep, they took out 3 Wisdom Teeth and 2 molars...But they were having trouble and couldn't keep me out any longer, so I woke up with 4 hands in my mouth with these bastards picking out shards of my teeth...The roots were wrapped around the nerves so they couldn't just yank...It was a mess...

After that I was done...I hadn't seen a dentist since...Jump to a few weeks ago when some dental pain got to be too much...It had been 10-12 years since I was in a dentists office...What it came down to was this...I needed 4 molars taken out...One was broken and couldn't be fixed...One was filled twice and the filling came out again, and I wasn't going through that again...So I let it go...Two others were just weak and chipping away...They said all my other teeth were as strong as could be...But these ones were just weak...

So the appointment was set for Monday...Get them yanked...I will be getting at least one bridge after this mess in my mouth heals...This Oral Surgeon was set on doing bone grafts and possibly talking me into implants...Implants aren't covered by insurance, and cost about $4000...NO thanks...I said no to the grafts...(Grafts are about $600 per spot filled)...They can lead to infections sometimes...BTW grafts are made out of a cadaver bone paste...It's creepy if you ask me...

So they sedated me...Then started numbing me up...I drifted off during this...Late in the process I was coming out of the sedation, and I clearly wasn't numb enough...One tooth was being a real son of a bitch...They were battling to get it out and I could feel it all...I was kicking my feet and tried to raise my left arm...I was sedated enough not to punch the f**ker...The nurse held my shoulders, and they kept having to tell me to open my mouth...I thought I was yelling so I assumed it was open...

I dozed out again...When I was awake and it was all done, they wheeled me into another room...My wife was there...I was loopy but could tell she had been crying...They had told her the bill was some f**king insane amount, and she had asked, "To pull 4 teeth? We don't have that." Mind you we paid $1000 in advance and our insurance will cover $1500...They informed her that it included the bone grafts...She said, "I told you no bone grafts when I put the $1000 down to schedule the appointment." She also told them how I had said no bone grafts...

So we all got together in this room and I asked "What's wrong?" My wife told me about the grafts...Well folks...The Beeze lost his shit...My mouth was swollen...I was drooling blood...And I was mother f**king everyone but my wife...The douche dentist said well in case you get an implant it's good that it's done..."I'm not getting a f**king implant!" They showed me the teeth and how large the roots were, and told me tat it was a lot of bone loss in my jaw..."I told you no bone grafts! I told her no bone grafts! My wife told her no bone grafts! Take the shit out!"

It was at this point they closed the door...Probably not good for the entire waiting room and office to hear a high insane bloodied mouth guy going bat shit on everyone...The douche then was informed by his scheduler that we had said no grafts...He said, "Don't worry, you don't have to pay for. We'll take care of it!" My response, "I said no grafts! Everyone gets infections from grafts! If I get an infection I'm gonna sue!" At this point my wife says I was crying...I blame the drugs...Then I puked blood all over the place...Even got some on douche bag!

Since then I've felt like shit...I'm on antibiotics which make my stomach feel like shit...I can't eat much of anything...Had lots of scrambled eggs, and soup so far...Oh I did kill a few snack packs...Today was the first day were the pain seemed to ease up...I've only put ice packs on my face once today...They did hook me up with some Vicodin...I've taken a few...But I'll probably be selling most of them to this one junkie at the Fish House!

Maybe it's just me who has bad luck with this stuff...But I wonder, Why do we need to water-board anyone...Why not just let c*ck sucker Oral Surgeons like this guy loose on terrorists?

That's what I've been up to...Time to pop some pills...

Later, The Beeze.

6 comments:

"McSpazz" said...

Dude, what in the sam hell is going on? Now dentist are freaking retards too!

What is it with this freaking country and our education system? Is it really that easy to get a degree in dentistry? What was so difficult about NO BONE GRAFTS!

Beeze I hope for your sake that you and your wife have secured a good mal-practice lawyer in case your grafts become infected. I hope for the dentist's sake that you don't have a follow-up appointment with him, because I have a feeling the wrath he feels from you will be even worse than the first time.

Hope for a full, fast and healthy recovery.

-A said...

First - I'm sorry for your pain but still you made me laugh (mostly due to the cussing)

Second - when you're pregnant it screws up your teeth. I had to get a root canal and that cost $800 I didn't have. I went it, the pain was just stupid, and I get there to find my doc has a migrain - they sent me to some russian dude (who was great) but $800?? And the I go back to my Doc for the "clean up" and that's another $400 and they want me to come back for the crown... another $750. But I cay be on a "payment" plan. Just need to give them $375 up front.

That was last April.

I still haven't gone back.
People shouldn't have to pay to be healthy. It's lame.

Hope you feel better.

The BEEZE said...

Thanks guys...I'm feeling a bit better today...Less pain at least...Still can't eat any good stuff!

Dentists suck!

afrankangle said...

Dang ... sounds you were a hurtin' ... but at least getting better.

One thing for sure, health care can sock it to us, insured or not!

Hoping for a quick heal.

bwsmith25 said...

Sucks you went through so much hell, Beeze - sounds like there are a few dentists out there who need a good skull f**king.

I hope you feel better soon.

The BEEZE said...

B-Dub, are you hinting at something!?!