Monday, December 31, 2018

Monday Moaning 12/31/18


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Today we are going to talk about football...The NFL to be specific...To be more specific, we are going to talk about a fan base that is overrun by idiots...I'm talking about the Pittsburgh Steelers...Generally I just try to ignore them...I grew up in Cleveland and in my lifetime, the Steelers have dominated the Browns and in general had a better run...Seriously, the last 30 years for the Browns has been fucking awful...

But if you come across one of these idiot Steelers fans, you'll quickly realize they have no clue when it comes to the history of the sport...If you ask them, nothing counted before 1970...They will hang their hats on the fact that their beloved team has more Super Bowl wins then any other team...6...For some reason they don't count NFL Championships...Maybe because they won nothing before 1970!

Steelers fans, you aren't the franchise with the most wins, most titles, or most championships....The Green Bay Packers have 13...The New York Giants have 8...The Chicago Bears have 9...The Patriots, Redskins, 49ers and Cowboys are on your heels with 5...Even the lowly Cleveland Browns have 4 as they were a power in the 1950's and 1960's...

But no one in the media or even in the NFL's ivory tower calls bullshit on the Steelers and their fans...Well, I'm here to say fuck you! Read the history...Stats and records are kept for reasons...One of those is to show the history of the sport...To keep a tally of the winners...To be able to reference the past...To be able to win trivia contests...Like who won the 1945 NFL Championship?

The Cleveland Rams beat the Washington Redskins 15-14 at Cleveland Municipal Stadium.....YES, the Cleveland Rams!

The history is also kept so I can say 'hey Shittsburgh, You aren't the best...As a matter of fact, you got a long way to go!

Suck my ass!

Have a week!

Happy New year!

Monday, December 17, 2018

Monday Moaning 12/17/18


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After quite a long time away, I felt like it was time to bring back the good ole, Monday Moaning....While I was away from the game, there has been no shortage of shit for me to rant and rave about...This weekend I snapped off this little rant on Facebook....

 I have now seen multiple articles along with tweets about people being offended and bitching about a movie from 1999...

1. Grow the fuck up! It’s a movie, in the comedy genre, that made it clear it was geared towards guys...Gen X’s “Porky’s” if you will.

2. Who the fuck cares if the jokes don’t hold up 20 years later...not the first time, won’t be the last.

3. People repeatedly calling it sexist and misogynistic...fuck you! You clearly didn’t watch the whole thing...some characters were, some weren’t....oh, and we just skipped that part of the female (redheaded) being the dominant one and the aggressor.
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4. There was a tweet about the movie crying sexism, saying (paraphrasing) ‘if you have testosterone it’s okay to have sex with any girl?’

WTF!?! Things I’ve learned in my 40 plus years in this earth, females get just as horned up as males, they can get laid easier (anytime) compared to males, and there are plenty of females who will bang any random guy. Your cry of sexism is bullshit.

5. Oh yeah, it’s a fucking movie! A twenty year old comedy movie people are getting offended by! “Mommy Dearest” was on last night...it’s a movie and a true story...you want to be offended, be offended at that Joan Crawford cunt!

For the love of god people, can we stop searching for bullshit to be offended by....there is some real, serious, awful shit going on in this country, in this world you should be upset about, that has real life consequences...if you’re getting upset over a 20 year old movie, you’re part of the problem!

Next up, this bullshit going around that Santa Claus should be a female, or even gender neutral....Seriously? I get it, we're in the #MeToo era so everyone has to hate men...You know what?   #FuckYou!!! This shit is getting real old, real fast...Now before your panties get in a twist, I'm all for you women...I'm against sexual assault...I'm for equal pay...I'm all for equal rights...And yes, I fully support the gay and lesbian rights...I fully support civil right for all...I support human rights....But jumping Jesus on a Pogo stick, you're hurting your case when you start bitching that a mythical character should no longer be male...I and I'm not alone, can not take you seriously...

If you think Santa, mother fucking make believe Claus being a male is where you need to dig your heels in and fight, you're a fucking asshole and you are now part of the problem.

Some may think this attack on Santa (remember he's not real) is part of "The War on Christmas".....Again, I say grow the fuck up! There is no "War on Christmas"...Like the jolly ole fat man himself, it's a myth...

Just a media distraction so the majority of dolts out there don't pay attention to the impending recession that will hit in the next two years...Or the fact that there are still children who were taken from their parents that haven't been returned to their families...Or the fact that everyone with ties to our President is being investigated and/or taking plea deals...Or the wars and the genocide going on.

I have always said Merry Christmas to people, and never once has anyone snapped and been pissed about it...And if it did bother them, I don't care...I was friendly, I didn't say Ho-Ho-Ho, go fuck yourself...So it could always be worse...

In closing, GROW THE FUCK UP!


Have a week.


Friday, June 8, 2018

A Great Loss





Normally, when celebrity dies I may be saddened but it doesn't impact me much...People die...When the great chef Charlie Trotter died, I was greatly saddened...When a celebrity commits suicide, well, for a long time, I shit on them...I understand people have demons, and deal with shit like depression...I do as well, but I have a hard time accepting people who have all the ability and wealth to get the help they need...But this blog isn't about that...It's about the loss of a culinary icon...

Up until 3 years ago, I spent my entire working life in the restaurant business...For a lot of that time, I didn't brag about what I did...I actually felt uncomfortable talking about it...Many people look down on the service industry...Yeah, they want people to wait on them and cook for them and serve them, but they don't really want to know you...Those people are fucking assholes!

I don't even know what my parents thought of my career path...Once they realized I was good at it, I think they were fine with it, but few parents out there are ever saying, 'God I hope my kid grows up to work 70 hour weeks for shit pay, high blood pressure and a drinking problem!'

Then one day I was in a Borders Book Store...Remember those places? I saw Anthony Bourdain's "Kitchen Confidential"....I bought and had read it twice in a week...It's the book I wanted to write but didn't have nearly the experience to do...It was brutally honest and talked about the shit that's never talked about when it comes to the restaurant business...He was one us...Started at the bottom and worked his way up...

The Food Network had been around awhile but it was bullshit...Emeril was a hack that made people think all chefs had or needed a catch phrase...Fuck all That! (that was ours at the Fish House)...Rachel Ray never was and never will be a chef...She was a made for TV salesperson...But Bourdain opened people's eyes to the grind...

Suddenly I felt I could hold my high about what I did for a living...As his popularity grew, it opened many more doors for other real chefs, and opened many more eyes of the public about our industry...His show "No Reservations" took people all over as he taught us about food and cultures so many of us never experienced...and many would be too afraid to try...And when he went to big cities like Boston, he wasn't taking us to big name places and big name chefs...He showed us the underbelly of the culinary scene...Hard working, hard living, chefs taking shit to the next level and not getting the fanfare and not even seeking it...He delved into the underground music scenes, and took us to hidden gems...

Then with his CNN show "Parts Unknown" he took that same format to the next level...Exploring cultures, religions, history and yes, food, from all over the world...He shared the stories of legendary people, that we never knew of...Little tidbits of history they don't teach in school...And the food and drinks...So much we never knew about...so much we want to try now...And one of the greatest things he did.....He championed the little guy...The Hungarian film editor...The no name indie musician...The Detroit chef, in a dead part of town, starting a public garden and making amazing, yet affordable cuisine, hoping to be a small part of turning things around.

Anthony Bourdain was great chef, who started in the dish-pit...If he never wrote great books and did great TV shows, he still would have been a great chef that achieved more than so many of us dream of...But he took his culinary knowledge and his easy way with people, and was able to teach us so much more, about food and culture and humanity...

I don't know what drove him to take his own life and I am greatly saddened by it...I feel he had so much more to tell us and teach us...Maybe I'm just selfish because someone I looked up to is gone...


Friday, May 18, 2018

The Last Year Sucked


It's been a long time since I've done this...Honestly, I may have forgotten how to do it...In my blogging/writing prime, I was posting multiple blogs a day and I was definitely writing every day...Then my life changed drastically and in many ways...I lost time and the drive to write every day...I slipped down to one day a week until I just stopped...Why did I stop...Mainly, because I had written honestly, and was an open book, and I no longer wanted to let everything flow out of me...I didn't want to dig into certain feelings, nor did I want to share much of them...

I think now is time...I think I need to...Because I have become a depressed lump of shit...If you know me, or read the blogs back in the day, you know I've always had a angry streak...The anger is still there, it's not going anywhere...But the depression has built and built...

The Changes 

A few years ago, we moved from Cleveland to Erie, PA...We did it for good reasons...To help my in-laws...Both dealing with dementia...At the time, my Mother was battling cancer...But at that point things were looking positive...She was getting better...She had a brutal battle, but the docs were feeling great with her results...I hated breaking the news to my parents...I felt like I was betraying them...But they understood and supported us...They may have been pissed at us, but they never showed it...

Also, I left my life long career in the restaurant business...That was a plus in the sense that the life is tough for a family...But I loved that evil business...I still have dreams about those days, and one day will find my way into owning my own place...

Then Shit Got Worse

My Mother's cancer came back with a vengeance...It was brutal...Then I quit writing, the day I accepted the fact that my Mom was dying...I played the positive bullshit card as much as I could for the kids, but it was over a good time before she passed...I had fully accepted and mentally prepared myself that she was leaving...There is only one single guarantee about life...It will end...

In a couple days, it will be the one year anniversary of my Mother's death...She was in the hospital, they were managing her pain, and the last week, I was driving into Cleveland every evening and sending the night with her...My brothers and I took shifts along with my dad staying with her...That last morning, I knew she was going that day...I told her we'd be ok...I'll told her it was ok to go...She didn't need to fight for us anymore...When I was getting ready to go, my Dad said, "I'll give you a minute to say goodbye"...He hadn't done that before...He knew too...We all did...So I wasn't surprised when he called a few hours later and told me she was gone...

I got out of bed, and waited for my wife and kids to get home...They had gone to see my mother-in-law...I broke the news to them...The tears flowed, except from me...I'm the dad...At that time, I can't cry...I have to be their rock...I will never forget when my Grandfather (my dad's father) died...I didn't see my father cry...He was a rock for everyone...The day of the funeral, after it was all done, and he had handled what he had to...He went upstairs alone, and for the first time in my young life, I heard my father cry...But I didn't see it...It didn't see him cry until my Mom, his wife of 47 years died....

After I told the kids, and things settled down, I went to take a shower...But first I sat on the bathroom floor crying, and silently telling my Mom I was sorry..."I'm sorry I left you, I'm so sorry"...People tell me I can't beat myself up for moving...People will say they understand, and I didn't do anything wrong...They may be right, but I can't shake the feeling that I betrayed my mom, or that I let her down...

Firsts 

Since that day, every day has been the first something without Mom...And let me tell you, The first Christmas, and first birthday and first this and that (big days) suck an epic sack of balls...But very single day has sucked, because so many of those days are days that I would have called her, or she would have called us...So many things happen and I think, I gotta call Mom and tell her this...FUCK! Kick in the head! I can't call Mom ever again...There is so much we assumed she'd be around for and now life sucks so much more because she's not around for any of it.

I have dreams about my mom and wake up, and the first thought is 'SHIT!' It was a dream...Back to reality...Shitty steaming pile of reality....

I miss Mom every day, if only in the littlest way...A small flower popped up in our yard...My first thought was 'Mom'...I have barely listened to the Beatles in the last year...I hear the Beatles and all I can think of is my Mom...Every Beatles song makes me sad these days...She loved music...Lots of different music, but for me, the Beatles mean Mom...

Where Do I Go From Here

People say when someone you love dies, that it'll get easier...When my grandfathers died, it got easier, but I was young...When my cousin died, I got mad, and found myself questioning every bit of the Catholic religion I was raised in...I was still young and it got easier and kicked my brain into gear when questioning shit...But this is different...This is my Mom...My kids grandmother...A woman I could ask anything, tell anything, and would offer any and all help she could give, and support anything I did...Anything my brothers did...Anything my wife and kids did or needed...I don't know how this gets easier...I don't know how I stop being mad at myself...I don't know how I stop being sad...I'll never stop missing her.


The last year has sucked...There have been good things that have happened...There have been fun times...But it's all overshadowed by the fact that Mom is gone...That I couldn't share it with her...That the kids couldn't tell her about it...

How the fuck does it get better?