Tuesday, April 14, 2009

What the Hell Kinda Game is This?

So twice a week I take the kids to swimming lessons at our local rec center...The place is great...It has two indoor pools, and one outdoor...It has a ice rink...Work out area...Out back there are two little league fields...
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After the lessons are done we get stupid SpongeBob Ice Cream bars, or whatever snack they are in the mood for that day...We'll head upstairs and go checkout hockey practice, or figure skating practice if they actually get a turn that week...


Right before we get to the ice rink's seating area...There are three windows that overlook what at one time was a racket ball, or hand ball court...Now it is being used for some f*cked up form of Volleyball...I say f*cked up because it's not really Volleyball...The kids always want to stop and watch this nonsense...

First, these knuckleheads don't even use a volleyball...They use some silly, old, blue, phys ed ball...Like the ones we use to use for dodge ball...You know...Back in the day, when you could play games where you chucked balls at other kids...Unlike the game Father John tried to play with us...
Second, they pay the ball off the walls...When they serve, it seems they actually try to get the ball hit low on the wall, near a corner to try and get an odd bounce to the floor...Thus scoring a point in a very shitty form of the game...It's so f*cking lame...

Third, is the douche bags that play this game...They are all well over 40...You tell there are a few guys that is the highlight of their week...One of these twats came up with this game one night in his basement while he was shit-faced...He told the boys...One of these jokers said ' we should start a league!' Really?

So these dolts get all geared up for this every week...There's one guy who is rockin' his knee pads and goggles...Then there Johnny Dolt, who has to have his batting gloves on...Seriously? But the worst one is Super Douche...This ass-clown has got 4 wrist bands on...A head band...And he has four fingers taped up...I wouldn't be surprised if his ankles were taped too...

I'm not trying top dog these guys for getting some exercise...But this seems kinda silly...They play 4 on 4...So it's not like they are running around much...It's a pretty small box they're in...(Insert Joke here) They're bouncing a ball off of walls and over a net...Do you really need your batting gloves? Do you really need all the f*cking wrist bands? Do you really need your fingers taped?
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Seriously...If I become that big of a douche when I'm 45 or older...Or hell, younger...Please do me a favor...Punch me in the face!
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Later, The Beeze.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Sounds like a bad sitcom moment! LOL! I promise to backhand you if you ever fall to such a level of idiocracy.

Please do the same for me.

The Beeze (aka: Tim McNeeley) said...

It's a deal!

Anonymous said...

LOL ... love the "came up with this game one night in his basement ...we should start a league!" That could be stuck in my mind all day.

Well done.