1. What bill do you hate paying the most? ALL OF THEM IS TOO EASY TO SAY...I'LL GO WITH THE WIFE'S STUDENT LOAN.
2. Do you miss being a child? NO! I ACT LIKE ONE ALL THE TIME! HA!
3. Chore you hate the most? DOING MY DAUGHTER'S HAIR IN THE MORNING...STILL NEED MORE PRACTICE!
4. Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner? TEXAS ROADHOUSE...HA!
5. If you could go back and change one thing what would it be? I WOULDN'T HAVE MAJORED IN BUSINESS...
6. Name of your first grade teacher? SISTER KATHLEEN...NICEST NUN I HAD!
7.What do you really want to be doing right now? HAVING SEX AGAIN...IT WAS REALLY GOOD TONIGHT...RED HAIR...RED STOCKINGS...OH YEAH!
8. What did you want to be when you grew up? 1ST A DENTIST...THEN ONE OF THEM RUINED THAT FOR ME...2ND A STAND UP COMEDIAN...NOW...A WRITER
9. How many colleges did you attend? 2
10.Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now? IT WAS THERE
11. What are your thoughts on gas prices? THEY HAVE BEEN QUIETLY CREEPING BACK UP...EVIL F*CKING OIL COMPANIES!
12. First thought when the alarm went off this morning? I HAVEN'T SET AN ALARM SINCE MY DUGHTER WAS BORN....THESE TWO KIDS ARE UP BEFORE THE ROOSTER!
13. Last thought before going to sleep last night? 'SHOULD I RUB ANOTHER ONE OUT?'
14. What famous person would you like to have dinner with? IF IT'S GOING TO LEAD TO SEX...ISLA FISHER....IF IT'S JUST ABOUT GOOD CONVERSATION...GEORGE CARLIN OR NIKOLA TESLA
15. Have you ever crashed your vehicle? NO!
16. If you didn't have to work, would you volunteer? YES
17. Get up early or sleep in? I GET UP EARLY...BUT I WOULD LIKE TO SLEEP IN
18. What is your favorite cartoon character? STEWIE FROM FAMILY GUY...MAYBE BRIAN...
19. Favorite thing to do at night with a guy/girl? SEX!!!!!!!
20. When did you get married? APRIL 13/14 2001...TWO DATES I KNOW...LONG STORY
21. Favorite lunch meat? ROAST BEEF
22. What do you get every time you go into Wal-Mart? F*CK WAL-MART THOSE EVIL C*NTS!
23. Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual? NO
24. Favorite movie you wouldn't want anyone to find out about? WELL IF I WOULDN'T WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW...WHY WOULD I TELL YOU...OH, WHAT THE HELL...THE NEW GUY...I KINDA DIG COYOTE UGLY...THEM CHICKS ARE HOT!
25. What's your favorite drink? COFFEE...BEER IS A CLOSE SECOND
26. Who[m] from high school would you like to run in to? JUST YOU...YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE...HA!
27. What radio station is your car radio tuned to right now? THE VIRUS
28. Sopranos or Desperate Housewives? SOPRANOS
29. Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back? STAYED TOO LONG WITH SOMEONE I DIDN'T LOVE
30. Do you like the person that sits directly across from you at work? I DON'T SIT AT WORK
31. Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purposes? YES
32. Last book you finished reading? WHY WE SUCK
33. Do you have a teddy bear? NO
34. Strangest place you have ever brushed your teeth? NEVER BRUSHED IN A STRANGE PLACE
35. How old are you? 33
36. Thing you hate about Facebook? WITH A PASSION...THAT'S WHY I HERE EVERY F*CKING DAY!
37. How many cars have you owned (not that your parent's gave to you)? 5
38. Since Graduating College, how many times have you moved? 5
39. What is your college degree and are you using it in your current job? BA IN BUSINESS....NO!
40. What's the best advice to offer children? DON'T BE A DOUCHE! BUT SERIOUSLY...WORK HARD IN SCHOOL...AND STAY AWAY FROM DOUCHE BAGS....YOU DON'T WANT TO BECOME ONE!
Later, The Beeze.
