Is It Spring Yet?

It's official...I'm over this Winter shit...I have been thinking about how great it would be to move...Start a new adventure with my wife and kids...A fresh start, somewhere else...Take a chance...My wife and I have always wanted to go to the Pacific Northwest...Seattle, Portland, shit like that...The Mrs. and I joked about moving to Seattle...Thursday night, she came in from walking the dog...It was 4 degrees out...I had already had my fill earlier in the day shoveling the snow...She gave me a look...I pulled it my phone and looked at Seattle's weather...I said, "Honey, it's 57 degrees with a light rain in Seattle."  She replied, "Let's move!"  Unfortunately, there would be a serious pushback from our kids...Especially our oldest...

So for now, all I can do is look forward to Spring...I've always been a Fall and Winter guy, but as I get older, I can do without Winter...And with Spring comes Baseball...I miss Baseball...Not so much MLB...And not even Fantasy, which after winning two leagues  last year is surprising even to me...

Surprising to me, I miss coaching Baseball...This past Summer was the first time not coaching my son and a team in baseball, after 4 years of doing it...When I took my promotion at work, coaching was taken off the table...And my son decided not to play...I'm not sure how much of that had to do with me not coaching, but it bothered me that he didn't want to play...His attention deficit made it hard for him standing out in the field...But he was really good, without trying very hard...I was hoping to get him into the little details, but he just didn't want to do it...I wasn't going to push too hard...I never want to be the pushy sports dad...

I'll be honest, as I always try to do when I write...I've been finding myself getting depressed lately...Mostly late at night...There is a point that I should go to bed, but instead I stay up...I may watch a movie, or TV...But I slip off  into my head and just get into a funk...

One recent evening I started thinking about my days coaching...When I stopped, I had a feeling of relief, because my last season, there was a lot of bullshit with the rec department and the people running the league...It seemed the only people that gave a damn were about 6 of us coaches and a handful of parents per team...

But as I thought more, I really missed it...I was proud of how I coached...How I treated each kid the same...How they all got to play ever position...How if a kid on  my team made fun of a teammate or a kid on another team struggling, they ran a lap, and were warned not to do it again...And no parents gave me shit about it...They supported it...When I had a tiny girl, playing for the first time in her life, and learning everything from us, her teammates cheered for her when she was close to tears, and parents followed...They didn't bitch that I gave her extra time in the batter's box at practice, over their kid that had no problem hitting...They barked at the umps for calling a strike on a ball over her head...

I thought about a Saturday scrimmage another coach and I setup, because so many games got rained out the one year...We played 3 innings, then some kids had to go...We mixed up the remaining kids, along with some older siblings that were there and played another 3 innings just for fun...After that I had kids wanting to stay and have me throw them batting practice...kids from 8-12 years old, all taking turns, for almost 2 hours...My arm was shot...But we had a blast...

I was proud that parents asked to have their kid put on my team...I was surprised when at a high school football game this year with my oldest, multiple kids that had been on my teams, walked up and said "Hi coach!"

I'm not trying to toot my horn here...I'm not the best coach...I wasn't the best coach in the league...But kids on my teams got better each season, and they had fun...I learned more each year, about baseball, about kids, and myself...I'm proud of my time coaching, and I hope I can find a way back to it some day soon...

I miss practices...I  miss games...I don't miss saying, "Stop playing with the dirt!" (the t-ball days)....I miss a bit of the chaos...I miss getting on the Ump for a bad call...I miss coaching...I miss Baseball...


Now, I'm going to get a drink, and sit in the dark with my friends Kenny Burrell & John Coltrane...





The Beeze