Monday Moaning

Welcome to another installment of Monday Moaning...You will read nothing about Soccer here...Sorry folks, but I can admit what so few people seem to be able to lately...I'm American...I don't give a fuck about soccer...Don't watch it, don't act like I have  a clue about it...don't waste my time, money or energy bothering to pretend to give a shit...It's soccer...Let's be honest, in a couple weeks 90% of you will be back to not giving a shit...

So what should be the big topic this week...Is it the rumors that LeBron James kids have been enrolled in a Northeast Ohio school...No...DON'T FUCKING CARE!

How about this...Friday night I attended what will be my last Major League Baseball game...Unless by some freak way I become rich....My wife's company got tickets for the staff and their families for the Indians and Tigers game...And good seats...The Club seats...You know a "higher class of fans" until they put us there! Supposedly the food is better...There's a full blown bar and dinning room...With the seats food and soda (pop for Ohioans) were free...Well thank you, because if I paid for that crap, I would have puked it back up into their faces...

Yes, I cook for a living, and I know quality food...But I love a good burger...I like greasy fries, and all kinds of unhealthy regular Joe shit...That's what I eat, because cooking in a fine dinning restaurant doesn't make you rich!

Seriously, I had a burger and fries that were nauseating...Then some one pointed out a buffet line with "the good food"..."pesto alfredo with fettuccini"...except there was no pesto in it...Hell, there was no alfredo in it...It was buttered noodles with a splash of cream and parsley...Au Gratin potatoes, that were disgusting...One bite and you could taste the powdered cheese and milk mixture on the under cooked potatoes..."Braised Beef"....NOPE...barely boiled meat is what it was...I bet I've taken shits that would taste better!

I was physically ill...And I hardly ate...Later my wife got an old school pretzel...Best thing she ate all night...And beers...Beers at a ballgame are as American as a teenage loser fucking an apple pie...Ummm, or something like that....Beer prices ranged from $7.50 to $9.00... I stuck to free Dr. Pepper...Hell, this was the wife's outing, I was driving, she handled the drinking duties...She had a couple beers then her and her friend went to the bar for cocktails...Which were around $10...So we dropped about $50 on just getting her primed up for postgame fun...

Oh, I mentioned I was driving...We live 10 minutes from downtown Cleveland...We left a hour before the game...We sat in traffic for at least 40 minutes because there's so much road construction not getting done, that half the city is shutdown...BLOW ME!

Then after parking, which I went budget and found a $10 lot, which means a little more walking, but fuck paying $35 to park...We get to the Stadium...The game has started, and we stand in line for 10 minutes, waiting to get through the metal detectors...I remember a time when this didn't happen at stadiums...And yes, we are a more scared, and frightened nation these days, mainly because there are just so many worthless, fucking, nut-case assholes out there...

So here is the choice...Should I be inconvenienced by waiting in a long ass line and missing an inning or two because there is a chance some  fuck-tard wants to shoot up a stadium?  Or should save the $67 per ticket, stay in the safety of my own home, watch the game on my HD-TV, drink my 6-pack that cost as much as one beer at the stadium, and eat fucking awesome food that I made myself?

I think that's an easy question...MLB, and the Cleveland Indians, you won't be getting anymore of my money...

As for the game...The Tribe lost 6-4, but my fantasy team scored HR's from Victor Martinez, JD Martinez, Carlos Santana, and Asdrubal Cabrera, plus hits from Kinsler and Brantley, so I felt like a winner...

Have a week...

The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

The Rangers lost the Stanley Cup Finals Friday night...There's only one real way to get over it...Yep, sexy women and drinking!

Now I haven't been full of confidence in this team all year, but when they've gone this far, it's hard to not buy into what they've been doing...They got to the finals for god's sake...They must have done something right...Well shit, they do have one of the best goalies in the world...He alone will steal you some games...But it was clear, against the Kings the Rangers would need more...As I pointed out last week...The lack of production from Rick Nash was a killer, and if they were going to come back, they needed him to start lighting the lamp...Well, it didn't happen...

That right there really sums up "the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat."

Lundqvist made 48 saves in Friday's double OT game 5...I'm not sure what else they guy could have done...The winning goal, he had no chance at, and still was close to getting it...Rewatching the play, the winger racing back, along with the two defensemen all went towards the shooter breaking in...Lundqvist made the save and the rebound went off to his right...Right onto the stick of the wide open defensemen Martinez...Martinez who also got the game 7, winning OT goal against Chicago in the conference finals...Nice playoff for him...

Lundqvist has always been an intense competitor, but I've never seen him look the way he did after this defeat....

It took some time before he got out of his pads...

My hope is that the Rangers who will stay in New York with Lundqvist, will remember tis feeling, and use it to drive them next year...

That said...Now is the part were I call some players out...As I mentioned, I took care of Nash last week...First...The three guys wearing "A" on their chests...Since trading Callahan no one has worn the "C"...

1. Brad Richards with his grossly high priced contract...Last year he sucked so bad in the playoffs Torts put him on the 4th line, and then scratched him for a couple games...That couldn't happen again right...Wrong...new coach Alain Vigneault put Richards on the 4th line during the Finals...Richards had 1 assist in the Finals...That's it...Big-money playmaker, one assist...Luckily, reports are now out that the Rangers will use their buyout and unload Richards after 3 disappointing seasons...

2. Marc Staal...At least 1000 of my tweets are bitching about how much Marc Staal sucks and is overpaid...Staal is suppose to be a top-notch defensive defenseman...BULLSHIT! He often looks slow...Often gets caught out of position...Often is too weak with his passes, or clearing attempts, leading to turnovers...I would be thrilled if the Rangers could trade this overrated prick...Please Carolina, try to reunite all the overrated Staal brothers!

3. Dan Girardi...This one hurts because I like Girardi...And when he shit the bed in game one and coughed up the puck in his own end, leading to a Justin Williams OT winning goal, I was pissed, but it's rare that he fucks up like that...But as I watched more, I noticed he was not playing like himself...His passes started looking like Staal's...He was getting physically manhandled...Not what you want to see from your defensive stalwart...I'm honestly expecting to hear about an injury with Girardi soon...His whole game looked off, and I wouldn't be surprised if an injury was the root of that...

So he's getting a bit of a pass, for now...But the other two can eat my ass...

The Rangers leading scorer  in the playoffs was defenseman Ryan McDonagh...While I'm glad the kid had a great run, that says something about your teams offense....But there are positives...Along with McDonagh, the Rangers showed there is a core of young, scrappy, talented players...Krieder, Stepan, Hagelin, Brassard, Zuccarello, all played well, and consistently through the playoffs, and all ahead of Richards and Nash in scoring...

The Rangers have some good talented players in the minors...Getting a few of them in the mix next year could add speed and grit...Two thing LA showed they had more of...LA rolled four strong lines...All had speed...All had at least one guy who will do the dirty work...They also rolled 6 strong blueliners...Not many teams can say that...

The fact of the matter is, The Rangers getting to the Finals was a helluva feat...But whatever team they were going to face was gonna be a bitch for them...Right now, the west is a better conference...LA, Chicago, Minnesota, St. Louis, San Jose, Anaheim, are all strong...Colorado is on a big upswing...Dallas is showing signs of life...The East has the Rangers, The Bruins, Montreal...The Penguins get hype but have show a knack of blowing up in the playoffs...Philly can't find a goalie worth a shit...Detroit is a mix of old and young, and was hammered with injuries...

The only team in the East that could hang with LA and Chicago this year would have been a healthy Boston team...And they weren't close to healthy come the playoffs...

Enough hockey...It's making want to drink more...

I hope all you dads out there enjoyed your Father's Day...Doing what I do...I had to work...So this is how I celebrated...

Have a week...

The Beeze.

The Curious Case of Rick Nash

 

Rick Nash walked into the NHL as a first overall pick, and a superstar...He instantly became the face of the Columbus Bluejackets and a fan favorite...For most of his time there, he was the only bright spot on a struggling expansion franchise...He was a prolific goal scorer...A great passer...While not the fastest skater, his skating ability and strength overmatched many...And his stickhandling was amazing....He was a Rocket Richard Trophy winner, and an All-Star Game MVP...He also holds two Olympic Gold medals...One of those, working on the third line, and filling the role superbly...Often having the announcers talk about him being one of the best players on the ice, even though he wasn't on a scoring line...

In his first couple years, league tough guys tested the young, big, strong Nash...He held his own, to the point were he didn't get tested to drop the gloves much more...And playing under a coach like Ken Hitchcock, Nash improved his defensive game, stick checking, blocking shots, and becoming a quality penalty killer...He had become an elite, all-around power forward...




Then in 2012, a year after signing a long-term contract extension with Columbus, rumors started swirling about what moves the Jackets would need to make to get competitive...Nash's name started coming up...Nash never asked for a trade...Nash never demanded to go to a certain team...He was a team guy, and loyal to Columbus...He went to the brass and told them, "if trading me is the best thing for the organization's future, get the best deal you can."

Nash was traded to the New York Rangers along with a 3rd round pick and a minor league defenseman...The Rangers gave up fan favorite, Brandon Dubinsky, Artem Anisimov, top prospect, Tim Erixon, and a first round pick...Dubinsky and Anisimov were two players under contract for a few years, who would fill immediate holes...Erixon was a year or two away...And it freed up the money going to Nash for the next 8 years...It was a good move for Columbus, even though fans didn't want to see their star go...

As a Rangers fan and a Nash fan...I was thrilled...This would bring a surge to the Rangers offense, and he was able to play their defensive style as well....In New York, Nash hasn't always looked comfortable...His offensive production had become very streaky...Then he took a series of concussions...Late in the 2013 season he was knocked out with a concussion which hindered the Rangers playoff run...Then at the start of this season, Nash took another hit to the head...An illegal shot to his head, then bashing his head into the boards...This lead to Nash doing something we rarely see in sports...Nash spoke out against the union for not working with the NHL to take these hits out of the game...He called out all players for a lack of respect for each other and their livelihood...

He came back, and was streaky...But the most noticeable thing was that his drive didn't seem there...The aggressiveness in his game is gone...In so many of those highlights you see him get to another gear...He's taking the game to another level...He's putting everyone on his back, and beating two d-men and a goalie on his own...Now he's not driving to the net...He's not getting in front and mixing it up, and waiting for a rebound to roof over the goalies shoulder...

What has happened to Nash? Have the concussions taken the edge away?  Has fear of another taken it away?  Has playing in New York shaken his confidence, going from big fish in a small pound, to little fish in the big apple?  He has never looked very comfortable in New York...Has a combination of things changed his game?

In this year's playoffs, Nash is at the top of the board with shots on goal...But he's not putting them in...The Rangers are down 2 games to none to the LA Kings in the Stanley Cup Finals....This is the moment that Rick Nash has waited for, languishing in Columbus for so long...This is the moment where Nash needs to put the team on his back...The playmaking goal scorer needs to return...

The Rangers have squeaked through the playoffs on the back of Henrik Lundqvist's great goaltending, and some timely goals coming from seemingly everyone but Nash...But I don't see them getting past this Kings team without a standout performance that superstar players are made for...Blueshirt fans everywhere are calling Rick Nash...We need you to come back if the Rangers are going to win this thing.


Oh yeah....Eye candy...

Have a week...

The Beeze.

Jonah Hill = Full of Shit

This week, actor Jonah Hill was being annoyed by a typical asshole paparazzo...Eventually he had enough and told the douchebag, "Suck my dick faggot."  

Boom...I was done with it... Nice job Hill...Although you told a dude to suck YOUR dick, so would you also be a faggot!?!

Who cares! Was to stand your ground...Oh, wait...This is America...You can stand your ground with a gun, but not with words...Some where along the way, words started hurting more then bullets...Yep, America, Land of the Free and home of the overly sensitive...

Hill, knowing the climate of this once proud nation, that is now under the impression that no one should ever be offended, and everyone is hyper sensitive about words, and their immense power to injure, started doing the power apology circuit...Including this one on The Tonight Show...





I'm sorry...I know many people are proud of him, but I'm calling bullshit!  He is doing this for one reason and one reason only...His career...He wants to keep making movies, and money...Yeah, he may actually support gay rights...I do...But he says faggot...He does...Just like I do, and many people do...With that grade school mentality, where you say shit is gay, or call a buddy a fag, just to bust balls...That's reality people, but no one wants to say it...

And another reason I'm calling bullshit...Have you seen Hill's movies...He calls people faggot in them...He relentlessly used multiple slurs to call McLovin a fag in "Superbad"..."Money Ball" is the only Hill movie I've seen where gay slurs weren't used...Any movie his buddy Seth Rogen puts him in has homophobic slurs in them...Oh, wait...Hill was in "Django Unchained"...He didn't say anything like that in Django...He just played a Klan member, in a movie where the word nigger was used at least 200 times...

So what Jonah, it's okay to say this stuff and portray pieces of shit in the movies, but it's not okay in real life when some prick is annoying you? 

Listen, when you're pissed enough, you try to say something mean...You want to upset the asshole...That's reality...I would have respected Hill more if he didn't do the apology tour...If he would have ignored it...The women of San Antonio were pissed Charles Barkley said they were ugly...When asked if he wanted apologize, Barkley said "no" and repeated how ugly they are...Not nice?  Maybe...Funny?  Yes...Honest? Yes...

Pay attention closely people...I've been...For the last two months there hasn't been a week without some one in the media, or sports, or TV/movies who hasn't apologized for something because some one may be offended by it...Honestly, the longest stretch has been about two days...

What happened America?  When did we get so fucking soft?

Fat guy actor called douchebag paparazzo a faggot...#SoFuckingWhat!

The Beeze.

Twenty Years

Twenty years sounds like a long time ago.....Yet it went by in a flash...Twenty years ago Forrest Gump came out...Along with Ace Ventura, Reality Bites, Dumb & Dumber, Pulp Fiction, and The Santa Clause...

Portishead's album Dummy came out 20 years ago...So did Weezer, by Weezer, Dookie by Green Day, Under the Table and Dreaming by DMB, Pearl Jam's Vitalogy, and Jeff Buckley's Grace...

Twenty years ago O.J. Simpson was arrested for double murder...

Twenty years ago, Major League Baseball had a lockout/strike that killed any chance of an amazing Cleveland Indians versus Montreal Expos World Series...

Twenty years ago, I graduated from high school...

And the highlight of 1994...The New York Rangers won the Stanley Cup!

After suffering my first 18 years of life as a Rangers fan, I saw a winner...And lets be honest, I was seeing any winning growing up in Cleveland for a long time...It had been 54 years since the Rangers had won the Cup, so as for being a long suffering Rangers fan...I had some catching up to do...But since 1994, the Rangers haven't been back to the Stanley Cup Finals...Hell, they've barely even sniffed the Finals since then...But here we are, twenty years later, and the Rangers are going back to the Stanley Cup Finals...

The Rangers will face the LA Kings...The LA Kings and the NY Rangers...The Marketing department's dicks are so hard right now...The Kings are good...Their Goalie, Jonathan Quick can go toe-toe with Lundqvist...They skate well...They're fast...Plenty of talent all over the ice...I'll be honest...I'm nervous...I have doubts...But that's nothing new....

 I didn't have a lot of faith in this team for much of the season...Early on, they seemed to struggle with adjusting to a new coaching staff, and system...They didn't seem as tough, physically, even though it was mostly the same team as the year before...But Henrik Lundqvist can always carry the team through a rough patch...Oh, wait...The he started out slow...His game even seemed off...But it came around...Slowly other pieces came around...But the offense was often lacking...

At the trade deadline, the Rangers traded their captain, Ryan Callahan to Tampa Bay for their Captain, Martin St. Louis...I hated this trade...St. Louis was 8 years older...Not a physical presence...And seemed like a bitch demanding trade after not getting selected by his GM to be on Team Canada's Olympic hockey team...And demanding to only go to the Rangers...Yet, the Rangers overpaid, giving up a 1st and 2nd rounder, plus Callahan...

Then St. Louis went 11 games without scoring a goal...While Callahan continued to play his steady, two-way game in Tampa Bay...I HATED this trade...Then came the playoffs...St. Louis' mother suddenly passes away...He seems to be playing on another level...Multiple, huge Game changing/winning goals...The rest of the team is feeding off of it...Now we sit here, heading into the finals...Looks like a good trade now...

I still HATE it!

Yes, I'm thrilled the Rangers are playing for the Stanley Cup...But there is a part of me that feels like it's screwed up that Callahan isn't there...Along with Lundqvist, he was the face of the Rangers...He was home grown...He played Ranger hockey, the way it's suppose to be played...But sports is a business right...Yes, yes it is...And the Rangers decided to make a move for business now, and risk some of the future...2 high draft picks and the captain, for an aging scorer who has one last push left in him...

Big picture, I still think its a bad trade...

But do I really want to wait another year or twenty?

The Beeze.