My Favorite Kid

This will not be the normal Monday post....The Moaning is taking a week off...Father's Day weekend has come and gone...It was  busy week/weekend for me, and I barely saw any sports...Topped off, by having to work Father's Day...The restaurant business rests for few things...

This post is something I planned on doing on Molly's birthday...But that was the day of the Sandy Hook shootings...Writing about anything didn't feel right...I just wanted to be with my kids....I have taken some heat from friends, because of how I feature Molls in blogs, and photos in Instagram/Facebook...(One album actually says "totally My Favorite Kid")  I love all three of my kids dearly, and saying one is your favorite over the others is a "No No" in the parenting world...But there's a story to it all...

I have always talked about Little Beeze, not using his name...And my oldest daughter gets little coverage...But my real name is out there now with Twitter/Facebook/Blogspot...It's Tim...I hide my oldest daughter because of the creeps out there, and feel I will have to do the same with Molls soon...Her name is Emma....The boy is Tomas...No silent H's in this house...I hate silent letters! The news of Molly broke in a blog early after I found out she was on the way...I needed to get it off my chest...It was a bit of surprise...We even took name suggestions, even though Molly was the front runner right out of the gate...So, why has she been dubbed the favorite?

When my wife woke me up after a night of heavy drinking with old friends, who I told we were not having anymore kids, by saying "When was my last period?" I became instantly sober...We took a test, and Boom! We had gotten rid of almost everything in the way of baby stuff...I really wasn't happy about the news...Really unhappy...

Just a year or so earlier I was pushing my wife to have another kid...She was done...No way...Tomas had broken her...His terrible two's went on for two years and she was done...And the first year of his life the only way he would sleep was with me holding him as I sat on the couch...He had medical issues with his digestive system where laying down, he was in misery, and discomfort...And the special formula almost bankrupted us...So That's how I slept for over a year...very little sleep and a stiff neck all the time...All that made him attached, where when he was finally in a bed, I had to lay with him until he fell asleep...That lasted for a awhile...So a year or so before I was pushing for another kid, she kept bringing it up, and at that point I was saying no way...

So we had finally agreed to it...No more kids...2 was fine...Then the news broke...At first my wife wasn't happy either...But right away, she was saying how she always told me we were suppose to have three...She just always felt that...She got positive right away...The alternative was out for her...No way she could ever go the abortion route...And while I lean pro-choice, I couldn't do it or ask her to do it...So she powered...I stayed unhappy for awhile...When we found out it was a girl, I had the name talk to get me upbeat a bit...Further along I put on my positive face for my wife and kids, holding down the worry that always comes with childbirth...As the day approached I kept thinking of the mistakes I made the first two times around, and how I'll breeze through on this one...

Then she decided to come...We headed to the hospital early in the morning...But then she decided to take her time...12 hours later she finally showed up...She was perfect and amazing...She laid on  my wife's chest and held her finger immediately...She had a tough grip right away...They say babies can't smile right away, but they're wrong...She did...Right then, I fell in love...I hated myself for being mad the last 9 months...I was being selfish...I was being an asshole...And I knew that night, because of Molly, that my reason for being here, was to be a father...The best thing I will ever do in my life, will be a dad....And that night my wife rested, while my Molls slept on my chest....

I have special connection to each of my kids...They are all special, and unique in their own ways, with their own talents, and I love them all so much...But Molls and I have a special bond...It's because of her, that I feel like I've become a better father to Emma and Tomas...She opened my eyes to who I am...

I'm their Dad....

Have a week...

The Beeze