Sunday, June 21, 2009

Finish this Sh!t (another thing from Facebook)

1. My Uncle was one: (and still is) A SICK PERVERTED A$$HOLE WHO MAKES MY TWISTED ASS LOOK NORMAL...

2. Never in my life : DID I THINK I WOULD WANT A MINI-VAN

3. When I was five : I WAS ALREADY A PRO AT MASTURBATION!

4. High School was : A PAIN IN THE ASS...BUT I LIKED IT

5. I will never forget : THE DAY MY KIDS WERE BORN
6. I once met : K'S CHOICE

7. There’s this girl I know who : WHO'S ASS I'D LIKE TO STRAP ON MY FACE LIKE A GOALIE MASK

8. Once, at a bar : I HAD SEX (gotta do that again)

9. By noon, I’m usually : COOKING

10. Last night : I HAD SEX...THEN STILL LOOKED AT SOME PORN AND SQUEEZED OFF ANOTHER ROUND

11. If only I had : A MILLION DOLLARS...WHAT A PARTY WE WOULD HAVE

12. Next time I go to gym/church : WILL BE THE FIRST IN A LONG TIME

13. Terry Schiavo : DEAD LAST TIME I CHECKED!

14. What worries me most : DYING ALONE (too deep?)

15. When I turn my head left, I see : A WALL

16. When I turn my head right, I see : A WALL

17. You know I’m lying when : I TELL YOU I'M LYING!

18. What I miss most about the eighties : CHICKS WITH HAIR UP TO THE CEILING

19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I’d be : HOW THE F*CK DO I KNOW...I DIDN'T RIGHT IT...ASK HIM

20. By this time next year : I HOPE TO BE RETIRED FROM THE RESTAURANT BUSINESS

21. A better name for me would be : I'M FINE WITH WHAT I GOT

22. I have a hard time understanding : WHY SOME PEOPLE CAN'T SHUT THE F*CK UP!

23. If I ever go back to school, I’ll : GET A DEGREE IN HISTORY AND PROBABLY WON'T USE THAT ONE EITHER

24. You know I like you if : I SAY I LIKE YOU!

25. If I ever won an award, the first person I’d thank would be : THE PERSON WHO GAVE ME THE AWARD

26. Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro : 4 PEOPLE WHO HAVE NEVER BEEN IN MY KITCHEN!

27. Take my advice, never : LET SOMEBODY LICK YOU ASS!

28. My ideal breakfast is : MY WIFE SITTING ON MY FACE!

29. A song I love, but do not own is : IF I "LOVE" IT, I OWN IT.

30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest : GOING TO BOSTON INSTEAD

31. Tulips, character flaws, microchips, & track stars : = NONSENSE

32. Why won’t people : REALIZE...IN THE GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS...THEY AREN'T THAT IMPORTANT

33. If you spend the night at my house : YOU WILL WAKE UP HURTING!

34. I’d stop my wedding for : A BLUMPY!

35. The world could do without : FLIES...i HOPE OBAMA KEEPS KILLING THOSE F*CKERS...F*CK PETA!

36. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than : THEN THE BELLY OF MY CHALUPA BOSS!

37. My favorite blonde is : JENNY McCARTHY


38: Paper clips are more useful than : A SHORT, FAT, LAZY, BROKEN ENGLISH SPEAKING, BOSS!

39. If I do anything well, it’s : BEING A SMART-ASS
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40. And by the way : "KNOCK KNOCK...WHO'S THERE? ...GO F*CK YOURSELF!"

Later, The Beeze.

3 comments:

CK0712™ said...

1. My Uncle was one: Jack Daniels

2. Never in my life : did i give a BLUMPY-LMAO!

3. When I was five : i can't remember, i was in kindergarten and i remember having milk & cookies ALOT

4. High School was : AWESOME, i miss it, i wouldn't change a thing...class cutter award @ the senior dinner, which i got kicked out of, cuz i smuggled in a bottle of Uncle Jack Daniels!

5. I will never forget : grabbing joe perry's ass at hershey stadium & having his security guy just about rip my arm off, i had the clamp of death on his ass !

6. I once met : Joe, Jeff & Angie
Joe Momma
Jeff Father
Angie Brother
LMAO!

7. There’s this girl I know who : is even crazier then me!

8. Once, at a bar : i was pulling a coyote ugly on the bar, my hair got caught in the ceiling fan........

9. By noon, I’m usually : blogging babeeeee

10. Last night : we cooked out, drank some beers, watched ANW & looked for people we knew LOL!


11. If only I had : Brain LMAO!!!!!!

12. Next time I go to gym/church : gym, yoga-church i don't go, i believe in god, just don't feel a church is necessary to show my love.

13. Terry Schiavo : holy crap, that poor woman, what ppl. around her put her through. all those legal battles & shit, sad!


14. What worries me most : someone fucking with my kid......i will do time trust me!

15. When I turn my head left, I see : my hubbies crotch, he's reading as i type & laughing LOL!

16. When I turn my head right, I see : my stereo equipment!

17. You know I’m lying when : i type/talk/say that i am! lying sucks though......

18. What I miss most about the eighties : the HAIR BANDSSSSSSSSS

19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I’d be : Out Damn spot OUT!

20. By this time next year : i'll be answering MORE beeze blogs LOL!

21. A better name for me would be : ?? i really dunno ??

22. I have a hard time understanding : WHY SOME PEOPLE CAN'T SHUT THE F*CK UP!
and i'll leave that, i'll second that!

23. If I ever go back to school, I’ll : become frisbee champ AGAIN!

24. You know I like you if : HA, what i gotta answer this.....ok in real life, i don't surround myself with douches. On the net sometimes they find me & i lose em when i realize they are just suckin off me......

25. If I ever won an award, the first person I’d thank would be : my kiddo!

26. Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro : ew i don't like darwin.....slim's kewl though! 4 people who've never been given a BLUMPY!

27. Take my advice, never : fuck with me........

28. My ideal breakfast is : coffee, bagel, cream cheese......YUMMY!

29. A song I love, but do not own is : nadda , i got all i love

30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest : hitting up the local biker bar, we have the best times there!!

31. Tulips, character flaws, microchips, & track stars : = WTF?

32. Why won’t people : stop the stupidness?

33. If you spend the night at my house : you will drink, drink, drink & then drink some more LMAO!

34. I’d stop my wedding for : NOTHING!

35. The world could do without : ANY fucker that hurts ANYONE for ANY reason.....they all, outta be shot!

36. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than : EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
37. My favorite blonde is : well fuck you very much beeze LMAO!
i dunno, i would say my son!


38: Paper clips are more useful than : staples LOL!

39. If I do anything well, it’s : being ME!!!!!!!
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40. And by the way : Bite me!

The BEEZE said...

LMFAO!

My wife wasn't happy with #37 either...I said "honey your hair is red now." She said ..."yeah because of you asshole!" LOL

I would totally take you over Jenny McCarthy! For real!

I wish I could have seen #8 happen...Holy sh!t.

Thanks for playing!

CK0712™ said...

LMAO!

The ceiling fan incident hurt like hell, specially my pride once i sobered up!!