Monday Moaning

Okay, if you're looking for any kind of NCAA Bracket talk, you've come to the wrong place...I've got no tips for ya...I don't have a clue...Basketball and I just don't see eye to eye...I mean c'mon, I'm 5'7"...5'9" with my skates on!

So I'll be starting off with some Cleveland Browns news...Last week the Browns dumped QB Derek Anderson...Good, nobody in their right mind is giving that guy a $2 million bonus...Then $7 million for the season...They made a deal for Seneca Wallace...Then the Browns made a few free agent signings, landing Tony Pashos, Scott Fujita, and Ben Watson...But they weren't finished...Then they signed 35 year old QB Jake Delhomme, who sucked for the Panthers last year...(Sorry about that B-Dub!)...Delhomme's deal is for 2 and the rumor is he'll make around $7 million...Dump a hack sign a hack!

Now Sunday night the news breaks that the Browns have traded QB Brady Quinn ( a former first round pick) to the Denver Broncos for Fullback Peyton Hillis, a 2011 6th round pick, and a conditional pick in 2012...It's also being reported that the Browns moved another former first round pick, outside linebacker Kamerion Wimbley to the Raiders for draft picks...

Well if nothing else Holmgren is making serious changes...I just wonder if they'll work...My God the Browns seem to be in a constant state of rebuilding...

Now onto some HOCKEY...That's right...Not Basketball...HOCKEY!

I was pretty pissed off this week when I found out Matt Cooke wasn't getting a suspension for his hit on Marc Savard last week...(You'll see it in the video in a minute)...Cooke made his reputation as a hard-nosed player, with some skill and excellent speed...In the last couple years his reputation has turned into him being a dirty, cheap-shot, punk bitch...And Saturday night, Don Cherry, said what he thought, as he always does, on Hockey Night in Canada...



God Bless Don Cherry!

The NHL should be embarrassed for not suspending Cooke...They also have to do something about the head shots...Concussions are getting out of hand this year...I can't wait for some one to end Cooke's career , that f**king punk...And Don is right...Crosby better watch himself!

Now, here's a little news from The Fish House...First...If you have a seafood allergy...Why are you being a pain in my ass and eating at a seafood restaurant?

So last week a member of The Fish House staff had an epileptic seizure...Now first off, the guy is an asshole, who's worked there since New Year's Eve...First day he pissed people off...Including me...Go figure...We come to find out he's a bit of a junkie...And a lazy b!tch...But this is how much people don't like the guy...After he had the seizure, a number of people felt he was faking it...He'd been trying to get out of work all day...Had the seizure...An ambulance came...And he refused treatment and went home...Three things...1. If you have a seizure and people think you are faking it...You must be an asshole...2. If you were faking it, which refusing treatment doesn't help your case...You're an asshole! 3. If you have Epilepsy, stop buying crack, and get the proper medication from a doctor, Asshole!

Then Johnny Asshole gets pissed and threatens to sue the company because they want a medical release before he can come back to work...F**k You!

So after a couple of days of bullshit, he shows up with a note saying he' okay to work, and says he'll be in the next morning...Guess who didn't show up? Johnny F**king Asshole! He did manage to come in around 2 in the afternoon for his check, and to give some bullshit song and dance about misreading the schedule...I don't know what the final outcome is going to be...The big guns get nervous when some ass-hat cries lawsuit...But my feeling is we should 86 the Asshole!

Toyota and their accelerator problems have been in the news quite a bit...I thought I'd share this video I found Saturday night with everyone...Just some tips, in case you run into this problem...



That guy is awesome!

Sunday we went to a St. Patrick's Day party at the home of some of my oldest and dearest friends...It was great seeing them all...It's been way too long...We were having a good time catching up, and bullshitting about things...But after a few hours the little Beeze hit his breaking point...He was good for the most part playing with the other kids...But he wakes up too damn early everyday, and when he gets tired he goes into full blown dick mode...you know how there's always one kid at a get together...That one kid that has to make a bit of a seen...Yeah, that's my kid!

Next time guys...Let's do this without the kids!

Good luck with your brackets people...If anyone wants to get into a NCCAA Hockey Bracket Challenge, let me know!

Let's close with some music...Our Lady Peace kicked off their "An Evening with Our Lady Peace" tour last weekend...2 nights in each city...Almost 3 hours of music each night...A bunch of songs they've never done live...It's pretty sweet!

Have a great week...

Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

Here we are again...Another weekend has blown by and another Monday is upon us...Hockey season is getting ready to start and we so I thought I'd start with a little hockey news...I know last week I complained about the NHL season being too long...I still feel that way, and I'm still not in the hockey mode yet...But Some news has to be talked about....

This week "The Great One" Wayne Gretzky resigned from the Phoenix Coyotes...It's about time Wayne...I don't mean to sh!t on Gretzky...He was the man, and I've always been a fan...But he proved something that has been proven many times before...Great players don't always make great coaches...When I say "don't always" I mean most the time!


When you're are so naturally gifted, and things seem to make sense easily to you...It's gotta be hard to translate that to people who don't have the same talent level...I always think of Ted Williams when I think of Gretzky...The science of hitting made so much sense to Williams...It came so much more easily for him then others...It had to make him nuts when he was working with a younger player, and they weren't getting the same results...

I'd like to suggest that Wayne and the Mrs. take it easy...Maybe take a trip to Vegas...We know how she likes to gamble!

Moving on...Saturday, after working a double at The Fish House, I got to enjoy a little Notre Dame football...God Bless DVR! Jimmy Clausen nutted up and the Irish beat Purdue 24-21... http://irishbuzz.blogspot.com/2009/09/irish-top-purdue-24-21.html

On the topic of college football...This weeks games showed us once again that the preseason rankings are crap...And that any team can beat anyone else...As I sat in a little Irish dive bar after work, I enjoyed seeing Iowa beat Penn State in Not So Happy Valley...I know people love JoPa...Well guess what...I don't! He's old...Really f**king old, and often the game looks like it's passed him by...The old guy is a figurehead...It's time to hang those big old stupid glasses up and enjoy the last couple golden years you got left...

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Cal got worked over by Oregon, who was wearing another stupid looking uniform this weekend...

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Tebow got hurt...Erin Andrews cried...I laughed...Tebow is a douche!

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The always overrated Florida State Seminoles lost South Florida...AWESOME! (sorry EK)

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Stanford beat Washington...Way to show up after last week's big win Huskies!

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I love this...The BCS is gonna be all f**ked up this year...I can feel it!

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Then Sunday rolls around...Holy sh!t Batman! the Lions won! I sh!t you not...the Detroit Lions won a football game! The Cleveland Browns on the other hand...Well, they sh!t the bed again...

This guy does a great impression of the Browns....

The Browns Offense sucked again...The Defense sucked again...The Coaches, sucked again...then they lifted Brady Quinn...
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Derek Anderson came into game and made a strong statement by throwing an interception...Ahhh, Cleveland...Let the QB controversy begin!

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You know, this year, I gave up on the Indians...Last year my buddy, B-Dub switched his loyalty from the Eagles to Panthers...I think it's time for me to start looking for a new team...I've been a Browns fan my whole life...I have far too many Browns sweatshirts, and T-shirts, and yes, even jerseys of assholes who never made it...Fans have been the only thing consistently loyal in sports...And what do we get for it...Nothing! Yes there are cities with teams that actually put the time, money, energy, and effort, into giving their fans a winning team...But not enough...And not in Cleveland...So I going free-agent...F**k off Browns...I'm going to a team that has a shot to contend this year!

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Now I have a little advice for all my gambling friends out there...No matter who the Browns are playing...No matter what the line is...Bet against the browns...If it's 11 guys in wheel chairs against the Browns...I'll take the Hot Wheels, and give you 3 points!

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If it's the Browns versus Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs...I'll take the b!tch riding the midget train!
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In Beeze family news this week...My daughter now has short hair...She donated her hair this weekend to Wigs for Kids...There was no coaxing...She brought it up, and said she wanted to do it...She makes it easy to be a proud father...

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This weekend is The little Beeze's birthday...He'll be 5...The only thing he's asked for is Spike the Dinosaur...Spike costs about $130...So I'm probably gonna sell off an organ or some blood this week...I mean with all the material he gives me for this blog, I kinda owe him...Which by the way, I got a e-mail this week from his teacher...She asked if we knew of a reason why he would be grabbing his junk so much...She has asked if he needed to go to the bathroom...He would say no...But would keep grabbing it...She thought maybe it could be a nervous habit...I'm not quite sure how to tell her that 1) He's a Beeze...And 2) He's discovered he gets boners, and is completed enamored by it...

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And lastly...Wednesday I turn the big 34...This has my older wife bothered...She asked me what I wanted for my birthday..."Besides a Blumpy"...I said..."I want ATM!"

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Have a great week...

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Later, The Beeze.

Monday Moaning

How the hell are ya gang...It's time for some Monday Moaning...Sorry if I get a little hostile this week, I just got home from a long weekend of working at the Fish House...I may be feisty...But I am now on vacation for a week...So I may calm down by tomorrow...

This week we're gonna start with Joe Montana...A couple weeks ago he made some comments, and I feel that I should address them...As many of you may know...I'm a Notre Dame guy...You may also know, most Notre Dame people love Joe Montana...Me...Not so much...I say, F**k Joe Montana! I haven't liked him since I was a kid...Let me explain...My mom grew up in a little Pennsyltucky town near Joe...Many years later, it was high school reunion time...The school contacted Joe to see if he would be attending his class reunion...Not asking him to do anything...Just asking if he would be coming...His response..."How much are you going to pay me?" F**K YOU JOE!!!


So on to Joe's more recent comments... "You can't ask any football coach here to be constrained like that on the academic side and to have a consistent team," Montana said. "Unless you try to relax some of that for the athletic programs here, it's hard to consistently compete with the programs that have different standards."

Again I say F**K YOU JOE!!! Why? Because he's f**king wrong...Notre Dame's Women's Soccer team is one of the NCAA powerhouses...The Men's Soccer team is always strong...Jeff Jackson has turned the Fighting Irish Hockey team into a top program...The Lacrosse team, strong...And on and on...Not just at Notre Dame...At plenty of Universities that hold there STUDENT ATHLETES to the same standards as their other STUDENTS...Don't blame the University, and it's education standards for poor performances on the football field...Blame the coaches...and even the players for not executing...

If Joe Montana would have lowered his standards, and expectations...He never would have made into the NFL, and become one of the greats...Hell, he never would have made it on the field at Notre Dame...

I don't want to sound like a d!ck, but f**k it...I think this has more to do with his son not being able to cut it at Notre Dame then anything else...That's right Nate Montana transferred to Pasadena City College...Sorry Joe, But the school shouldn't lower it's standards just cause some whiny parents say so...

This seems to be a problem these days...My kids are 7 and 4...I've had a number of people tell me I expect too much from them...F**k that...You expect too little...The goal of every parent should be to help give their kids a better life then their own...Well unless I start getting paid to write this drivel, or I win the Mega Millions...I'm not gonna be able to afford to send both my kids to Notre Dame, or Boston University, or where-ever, on my Fish House salary...So I have high expectations, and standards for my kids...You go ahead and let you kid be a lump of sh!t...Mine will successful in life...Maybe one day the little Beeze will be the first President to give the State of the Union, and close by pulling out his junk, and saying...'If you don't like it...Suck on this!'

So for the record...Joe Montana= Wrong/Douche....The Beeze= Right/Twisted...

Since I brought up my son...I shared this on facebook, but it needs to be said here too...Wednesday Night, we were all watching Wipeout...He loves that damn show...He was sitting in the chair with my wife...All the sudden he stands up...Pulls his pants down, and says..."Have you seen this guy before Mama!?" WTF! It was hilarious...F**ked up...But hilarious...I swear to God he didn't get that one from me...He's also still on his "boobies" craze...I can't wait until the calls from school start...

Next up...Word is, Patriots Linebacker, Tedy Bruschi is going to announce his retirement Monday... http://www.boston.com/sports/football/patriots/articles/2009/08/30/patriots_lb_bruschi_retiring_after_13_seasons/

Big talk in Cleveland...Who the hell is going to be the Browns starting Quarterback? I'll tell you who it should be...Brady Quinn...And this ain't a Notre Dame thing...He's just better...People love to fall for a guy like Derek Anderson who can throw the deep ball...Coaches included...Problem is, he throws everything like he's throwing a deep ball...The guy struggles with the short stuff...He has no touch, and doesn't see the field as well as Quinn...Plus when an organization spends what the Browns did, to get back up in the first round, to get Quinn...You gotta play him...I know Mangina didn't draft him...So the owner has to say, play this guy, or move him and get something back...It was a big investment...Giving Anderson a contract extension when they were going after Quinn was a bad investment...BTW, the Browns won their preseason game Saturday against the Titans, 23-17...I'm seeing some improvement...

Since we're on Football...It may be August still, but it's Fall in Ohio...High School Football Season started Friday...Yes folks, Ohio can be like mini-Texas when it comes to Football...Don't believe...Check out the documentary called "Go Tigers."

I live in a small community...We're not crazy like the people in Massillon (in Go Tigers) but we support our team...The high School is around the block from us, and the Football Stadium is at the end of our street...Friday at 7:00PM the band marches down to the stadium...The kids dig that...Students and parents, and neighbors follow...It's a great atmosphere...Like I said...We're a small community...One of my favorite things to do every year is count how many band members are also cheerleaders and football players...Nothing like a kid ripping off his shoulder pads and helmet at halftime, and breaking out his trumpet...

This week The Brooklyn (OH) Hurricanes lost to rival Rhodes High School 24-22...

Lastly this week...I wanted to share this link, and say hell yeah to Angelo Cammarata...Best of luck to him... http://www.gnn.com/article/cheers-prohibition-era-bartender-retires/644371

That's it for now...

Later, The Beeze.